280 Dam. Comebacks

Teacher- Did you do your homework?

Student - Did you grade my test?

Teacher - I have other students' tests to grade.

Student - I have other teachers' homework to do.

Mom: Go clean your room!

Me: But its MY room.

Mom: And this is MY house.

Me: Then you go clean it.

Girl: *stares at me for 30 sec*

Me: "What you looking at?"

Girl: " Idk, something ugly!"

Me: " BITCH, I ain't no mirror!"

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Bully - "Hey fat ass. Why you so fat?"

Fat kid - "Because every time I f*ck ya mother she give me a cookie."

Teacher: Where the hell is your math homework?!

Me: it committed suicide, had too many problems.