13 Jessica Song

The look on Jessica's face was priceless. She started jumping up and down like a giddy school girl when I pulled up to her house in the three-oh-two. Before I could put the thing in neutral she was across her yard and in the passenger seat.

"Oh my God just go! My parents would never let me get in this thing"

And like that she and I were in the wind. Jess was in awe running her hands over the dash and examining every inch of the cabin. I gave her the slyest grin in my repertoire trying to play it off cool.

"This is amazing! How did you get it moving while I was gone?"

"Little elbow grease, little time, little money"

Before she could say anything, I dropped a gear and tore off down the street showing off. Tony and I had worked over the original motor getting back to as good as new from the factory. The thing definitely had no shortage of torque.

Jessica was laughing beside me hysterically holding onto the door. For a second my problems where lost in that laugh. Her voice had a habit of doing that. We came to a stop in front of the ice cream shop. After I pulled the hand break I noticed Jess was unusually quiet.

Her hand suddenly reached up and wrapped around my chin. I was forced to face her. She had already unbuckled herself and was leaning over the center console. Her eyes shimmered dimly in her serious frown.

"What happened to your nose?"

"I fell"

"Great lie Jack"

I swore under my breath. I hadn't thought up a good lie for her. I was just winging it at this point and her question caught me off guard.

"Listen it's true. I really did fall. Slipped on ice working my new job"

Her eyebrows drew up questioningly. She had yet to let go of my face holding me entirely to close.

"New job?"

"Yes. I am a driver for a car parts company. I run parts where ever they need them"

She looked deep into my eyes searching for hints of a lie. I had recited that one enough to know she wouldn't see through it. It was however, getting very hard for me to think now. She was way too close to me.

"You actually got a job?"

I pulled away quickly making my exit from the car.

"You don't believe I could get one? That really hurts Jess"

"No, it's not that..."

She stumbled over her words as she exited the car. Now she was lingering on the car. Her hands traced the door's outline and down the hood. She paused for a moment letting her finger linger on some chipping paint.

"Where's the fox body?"

"At home. I wanted to surprise you with the three-oh-two"

"Can we go see it after this? I'd also like to say hello to your parents"

It was in that moment I realized the hole I had dug. I lied right to Jessica's face because I knew she wouldn't believe I just crashed the fox body just as Tony hadn't believed. Still I had a plan. I nodded to her and gave a confident little wink.

"I'm sure the fox body has missed you as much as I did"

She nodded clearly not amused. She still lingered on the three-oh-two as if something didn't feel right. I motioned for her to continue in.

"Go right on in Jessica. I'll pay for whatever you want today"

"I'll hold you to that"

She said with a smile turning to go in. As soon as her back was turned I dialed up Johnny.

"Favor time Johnny."

"What is it?"

"Call me in about fifteen minutes and pretend you're asking to borrow the fox body, and it has to be an emergency. I'm going to try to talk you out of it but you need to insist"

"Did you talk yourself into a hole or something?"

"Wow it's like everyone is Sherlock Holmes now"

"You lost me."

"Listen I've just being having a weird morning. Call me in fifteen"

"Got it Fox"

He clicked off. I paused for a moment in my stride. He had called me fox. Casually. Just off handedly. It felt odd to be called that outside of work. Shaking off the feeling I pushed right into the shop.

Jessica was sitting pretty at one of the booths. Not that she had the ability to not be pretty. I tossed my jacket on the table in front of her then crashed into the other side of the booth. Jess stretched out in her seat really relaxing.

"It feels good to be back. For as much as I hate this little town"

I smiled across the table at her and placed my phone down in front of me. Strategically ready for Johnny's call.

"If you hate it so much why do you like being back?"

"I don't know. I can't really place it"

"Maybe it's because you don't have me over there in the big city"

Jessica half laughed and half snorted at that one. A crooked little smile crossed her face before she grabbed my jacket and tossed it at my face.

"What's this confidence? You get a job and suddenly you're mister alpha male?"

"Would you rather the alternative?"

She shook her head still holding that smile. It didn't seem to want to leave. She reached over the table and took my jacket off me. She pulled it over her black long sleeve oddly slowly. As if she was putting thought and care into her movements.

"I think I like this better. Confidence makes everyone sexy. Even you"

"Wow I think that was the most backhanded compliment I've ever had, but I'll take it."

The waiter came to us finally. It was the same teen that took our orders when Jess cut class and hopped a greyhound to get here. She ordered a banana split and I took just a root beer float. I handed the kid a fifty without much thought and said keep the change. His eyes lit up as a real smile replaced the fake one. I felt for the kid.

Jessica hadn't noticed my charity thankfully. She probably would have had more questions. It was starting to seem like every move I made aroused some one's suspicion. Across from me Jess was fiddling with the sleeves of my leather jacket that where to long for her.

It looked like she was about to say something but the buzzing of my phone cut her off. I lifted it to my ear answering.

"One rescue call as ordered"

"Hold on Johnny let me put you on speaker"

I sat the phone down between Jess and myself. She raised her eye brow questioningly.

"Say hi to Jessica"

I announced to the phone.

"Hey Jessica. Jack won't stop talking about you"

She shot me a look.

"Is that so?"

"Oh yeah. Guy never shuts up about you"

I cleared my throat loudly and coughed.

"Anyways, Johnny what did you need?"

"I need to borrow your car if you don't mind"

I made a groaning sound and leaned back in the booth.

"I don't know man Jessica wanted to see the fox body while she was here"

"It's an emergency I promise. My mom is in the hospital over in Des Moines"

Jessica gasped and leaned over to the phone.

"You can take it Johnny I don't mind missing the fox body"

I gave Jessica a raised eyebrow.

"I'm glad you can just loan out my car for me"

She reached over and hit my arm with a fierce look.

"Let him take it. You have the three-oh-two"

"Fine. It's all yours Johnny. My keys are in my room"

"Thanks man I promise I'll bring it back in one piece"

He clicked off. Jessica sat back in her seat with a sad look. Her empathy dial was turned way too far up for her own good.

"I hope his mom is ok"

"I'm sure it'll work out. Things usually do for Johnny"

Jessica paused for a moment frowning.

"Was that Johnny Daniels? The one we went to school with"

"The one and only"

Our food came as I finished my sentence. I dove head long into that float trying to kill the cotton mouth sneaking up on me. Jess took a few spoon fulls of her split before continuing.

"Since when were you and the local burn out friends?"

"Since you and everyone else I knew left me alone in this town"

Jessica frowned and crossed her arms.

"It was hardly my call to leave. You know I didn't want to go"

"I do better than most. Don't worry I'm just joking. Johnny isn't so bad though."

"How long have you guys been hanging out?"

"Well since near graduation. We've been pretty close ever since."

I drank the float greedily. I wasn't even really a big fan of root beer but Jessica had turned me onto the soda.

"You really trust him with your car?"

"As a matter of fact Jess I trust him with my life"

She laughed heartily and rolled her eyes.

"Ok mister dramatic."

The two of us finished off our food. It seemed like a slow day for the shop. No one really came in the whole time we were there. That gave Jessica and I plenty of time to catch up. It was pretty one sided. She told me about how all her classes are going great and that she's on the fast track to be a doctor just like her parents wanted. Even if it wasn't her choice.

I wasn't blind to the irony. After all the trouble I had got myself into over the last month all I could say to Jessica was that it had been quiet around town. It was just casual lie after casual lie. It wasn't even really lying to me. Whenever someone asked me what was going on I just instantly told them everything was fine.

On the outside you would never understand the trouble I was in. Jessica was no exception. Tony only had insight because he knew about my mysterious money.

Jess and I laughed, talked, and cracked jokes for nearly an hour. She marveled at how I stayed sane here in this boring town constantly. I just said it comes easy after a while. We finally left the ice cream shop after that.

I drove her back to my house after that. I pulled up in the yard just as my mom was getting the mail. She was just as stunned as Jess was when I rolled up in the three-oh-two. It had just occurred to me that neither my mom or my dad had seen the car yet. I just told them it was getting worked on by Tony.

Her two-tone eyes caught the cloudy light in shocked amazement. When I parked the mustang, she came over running her hand across the hood. Jessica and I both exited, joining her at the front.

"I haven't seen this thing move since dad had it towed down here, and even then, it didn't run."

"Since I was getting some money in my pocket I thought it might do grandpa's memory some justice to get it back on the road"

Mom gave me a little side hug then gave a full-on hug to Jessica.

"Jessica Song! I haven't seen you since graduation"

"Well I haven't been in town since graduation Mrs. Krynn"

"I guess you're back for thanksgiving then aren't you?"

Jess nodded happily and leaned against the mustang's hood.

"Had to come see you guys since I'm back."

"Well you're welcome to come over whenever you like. You can stop by for dinner if you like tonight"

Jessica's eyes lit up as she clasped her hands together.

"That sounds great. I'll tell my parents"

Mom hugged me again and gave the car a once over again before going off to the house.

"Why do you have your mom's maiden name Jack?"

"Because my dad isn't my real dad. The only people there when I was born were my grandparents and my mom of course. That's why I got my grandpa's last name. Mom took dad's last name when they married and the rest is history"

Jess stood there for a moment thinking to herself. She crossed her arms and shivered as a cold wind passed us.

"I never knew that"

"All you had to do was ask"

Distant thunder rumbled overhead. The clouds where rushing in blocking what little sun light we had.

"I think that's rain. I've got enough rust on this car as it is so let's put it in the barn"

Jessica called up her parents and told them she would be staying at my place for a while and eating dinner. It was on the later side of the afternoon now. It started to sprinkle so Jess and I killed time in the barn. Out of curiosity she asked me about what Tony and I had done on the mustang.

I went over the upgrades and fixes. Explained some things about cars here and there. It clicked with me now that for once I felt safe; Despite a target being on my head from Ricky.

I was calm and safe, and I forgot the feeling. With Jessica so close and my parents a shout away I felt like I didn't have to be scared. I didn't have to call shots. I didn't have to save Johnny and myself. I didn't have to take a life. I just had to be me.

For the first time I considered maybe I should quit running with Adal. I knew he would let me go. After Chicago Johnny might even agree with me. Something in me was so obsessed with the rush however that I knew it would be hard to stop. Maybe it was at this moment that I stopped being a good person. When I clearly had a chance to quit, but faltered on it because the rush was a drug to me now.

Before I knew it, my mom was calling us for dinner. Somewhere between my horrible thoughts of staying with Adal and the explanation of combustion engines I lost track of time. Jess, myself, and my parents gathered around the kitchen table for homemade pork chops, and mashed potatoes.

The closest I had been to normal in months. Mom and Dad wasted no time diving into every embarrassing story they could remember just to make me squirm in front of Jessica. The joke was on them because I happily took the embarrassment over the fear I had been feeling.

When dinner was done Jess excused herself to the bathroom to wash up. She caught me on the way to my room. She followed me pulling my jacket off herself as she went.

"It's been years since I've been in here" she remarked

I was going to comment something back when the glimmer of something in my closet caught my eye. My gun. I yanked my jacket from her hands and tossed it over the object before she could see. It was rude, but nothing else I could really do. She plopped down on my bed with a sigh then stretched out on it.

I pulled the chair from my desk over to the side so I could sit. Jessica gave a little yawn and curled up.

"That's my bed"

"Not anymore it's not"

"I'm pretty sure both our parents would have problems with you sleeping here"

Jessica pouted. It was cute. Something in that innocence was just unreal.

"Sorry Jess. Besides people might talk if you start sleeping here"

"Funny Jack. Who's going to talk? Everyone we knew has moved"

"Sara and her new guy are still here"

She paused. Sara's name was taboo around her. I didn't know why truth be told. I couldn't recall a time Sara ever slighted her. It was never my business so I just kept the questions to myself.

"Jack do you really want to stay here?"

"What do you mean?"

Jessica sat up quickly and leaned in close. She dropped her voice to a whisper.

"You hate this town. I know you do. You hate this town, you hate Sara, and you hate her new boyfriend. This place is nothing but bad memories for you."

I leaned back trying to get a little bit of breathing room from Jess.

"I mean yeah. You aren't wrong. I hate this place but what am I supposed to do about it?"

Jess shook her head with a little groan before leaning in closer.

"Listen Jack. Just hear me out. With your grades you can go nearly anywhere you want. I know you don't know what you want to do but you feel different now. I don't know what it is but you feel a lot more confident. You can come with me to college next semester. Maybe I'm overstepping my bounds but I think you're ready to leave this town"

That was the closest I ever got to leaving. Something in Jess's eyes. Something in her voice. Something about the way she asked me to leave with her. It was so compelling. If she asked me to leave that night I would have.

"Why do you want me to come with you?"

She shook her head and sighed softly. I hadn't noticed it but as I asked my question I was leaning closer. To close. Dangerously close. I could feel warmth radiating from her. My lighthouse in the insanity just like Johnny.

"You're pretty dense you know that? All those book smarts and you can't figure it out?"

Jessica kissed me then. A bomb went off in my head shooting electricity through my veins. In that moment all my senses were lit on fire with the most blissful warmth I had ever felt. It wasn't a very long or deep kiss. Just a soft peck on my lips. It was enough. Enough to change something in me.

I didn't want to run anymore. Or rather metaphorically I wanted to run one more time. This time away from this town. Away from Adal. Away from Ricky. Away from the drugs and money. I wanted to bring Johnny with me somehow and get him away too, but the details could be worked out later. All I knew for sure was I wanted out now.

"You know how long I've been waiting to do that?"

I couldn't speak. I could barely breathe. I simply shook my head. I felt her hand place softly on my cheek and I couldn't help but lean my head into it.

"Ever since freshman year. When Sara let you go I thought I had a chance but you were so closed off after that"

She sighed softly and pressed her forehead to mine. She asked me one more time.

"Start college with me next semester?"

Jessica didn't understand fully what that meant to me. She was actively throwing me a line and pulling me back from the insanity I had got myself stuck in. I felt tears sting my eyes so I closed them tight and nodded. She couldn't fully understand what she had just done to me.

I had to leave before the tears spilled over. I went right to the bathroom and tried to compose myself. Over and over what happened in Chicago played out in my head. The horrible things I had done ran across my brain over and over again. The last thing I deserved was happiness. The last thing I deserved was freedom. What I did deserve was death, but somehow, I had made it this far. It could have been Johnny's luck, but something got me this far. I wanted out so bad it hurt, and I was going to get out one way or another.