Chapter 35

Translator: Yonnee

I opened my eyes in cold sweat. The surroundings were quiet. Suddenly, I realized that I was lying in bed, and I slowly sat up. Sweat was running down my forehead and back.

Dazed and bewildered, I looked around my surroundings little by little. I just sat there blankly as I pressed on my lower abdomen hard. Whenever I lacked essence, this part reacted so sensitively and quickly with even the slightest touch, but right now, it flinched only a little and had very little response.

So.

So…!

“I did it? With Regulus…?”

Yesterday was already a terrible day as it was so I thought nothing worse would happen, but something did.

There’s a pond behind the maids’ quarters. Would the water be very cold if I jumped in it?

With my head buried between my knees, I swallowed my gasps as I thought about why the hell Regulus was there and why the hell I had been so impatient. Still… at the very least Regulus would think that it was all a ‘dream’. Right, he had to think that way.

It’s clear that God truly did not exist.

Thinking of Regulus, I was on the verge of crying, but I barely held my sobs. I stumbled into the bathroom and doused myself with cold water.

·

“Hi, Lily! Are you going to work at the knights’ library starting today?”

I reluctantly dressed up and came down to the dining hall. I was just about to take a small bite out of the bread I had on my plate, along with a salad, but then Maria arrived and sat in front of me. She put down a full plate of food, and as soon as I heard her question, I grew depressed once more.

“…Hi, Maria. How did you find out?”

I still don’t want to accept this as reality. Whether it was last night’s affairs or what’s in store for me in the near future… But really, I haven’t met Maria lately, so I haven’t talked about it with her yet. How did she find out?

“I was with the head maid when she got the notice that you’re being moved.”

“I see. I was going to tell you anyway, but it’s difficult to meet you these days.”

“Uh… It’s because I got a little busy lately. I’m following the head maid around without even a day off. She’s secretly handing over her work to me little by little, but I can’t even say no because she herself has no time to rest. I feel like I’m going to die.”

“It must be hard. But think of it positively, at least this means that the head maid thinks highly of you.”

“That’s true… I really can’t whine in front of you, gosh. You’re not leaving of your own volition, huh?”

Maria said this with a knowing expression. I crushed the salad under my fork wordlessly, then I sighed.

Perhaps because my despair was all over my face, but Maria told me to cheer up. Then, she clapped her hands once as a smile hung on her lips, as if she had remembered something. She took out something from her pocket.

“I was going to give this to you before, but I couldn’t find the time to meet you because I’ve been busy. This is the hair tie I promised you before.”

“…You really bought one for me?”

“Of course I did. But does the man who tied your hair up know that you’re moving to a different place? Not just anyone can enter the Knights’ Complex.”

Maria handed me a small, light pink box. I avoided looking at her for a moment and just said, ‘Yes’. Maria didn’t pry as much as Lucy did, so she wouldn’t say anything mischievous if I told her something. But still, it was awkward to say that the person who tied my hair that day was Sir Endymion.

When I opened the box, there was a red ribbon made out of velvet inside. It was the first time I’ve received a gift from a friend, so my cheeks heated up a little.

“Pretty, right?”

“Yes, but wasn’t it expensive?”

“It’s not that expensive when it’s bought at the night market. There’s many merchants from other regions there, so everyone’s going crazy trying to sell as many things as they can.”

“Thank you, Maria. Really. I’m honestly really happy.”

There were many moments in my life when I was filled with despair and I had no one beside me, but now that my friends were taking care of me like this, I felt both grateful and sorry to them.

I undid my hair, which I had just roughly tied up earlier this morning, then tied it again with the ribbon. It was loose because I didn’t have a brush with me, but I secured it tightly so it wouldn’t come off easily.

“How is it?”

“Mm-hmm. Really pretty. The night market was really fun. We should go together next time.”

“Okay.”

I didn’t know when that next time would be. I nodded anyway, responding with a small voice. Then, after putting away the ribbon’s box into my pocket, I finished my meal while talking to Maria. After our meal, Maria went back again to the second floor because she was in charge of assisting the head maid again today.

I left the maid’s quarters and inhaled the cold outside air. I had vowed to myself that I was going home as soon as I got my ring back, but today, I made another promise.

What do I do with my friends? After I became a succubus when I was younger, I just always stayed at home. Even before that, I was a homebody, so of course I didn’t have any friends. I don’t know what to do now.

My heart fluttered for some reason. Humans were so fickle. Just a while ago, I was so depressed because I slept with Regulus last night, but now, I was feeling light-hearted again.

But really, who was I kidding. When I saw the main building of the knights’ complex, I couldn’t help but feel all twisted up again.

When I had my newly received pass checked at the main entrance, I went inside and heard some shouts not that far away. I knew that they started training early in the morning behind the main building, so I looked around calmly without being taken aback.

Sir Odil asked me to come to the conference room on my first day. I took a deep breath and walked further inside. I tried to calm down before I saw either Sir Odil or Regulus, but because I just felt so overbearingly nervous, I felt my expression growing stiff.

The bright interior of the main building was unfamiliar. After all, I’ve only visited this place at night. To get to the conference room, I needed to pass by the storage room Regulus and I were in last night, but I just deliberately walked straight ahead without looking to the side.

The conference room was on the first floor. As I got closer, I began to hear some voices through my sensitive ears. Walking around the corner where I could hear those voices, my heart started to beat rapidly.

And now as I stood before the exceptionally intricate door, which was the only barrier between me and those voices, I let out a long sigh. I didn’t hide my presence, so it became quiet inside as though they knew I was already here. I couldn’t even run away.

After hesitating a bit, I knocked on the door and soon opened it. I went inside, my stiff face slightly turned down to the floor.

“Excuse me…”

“Hello, Miss Lily. Good morning,” Sir Endymion greeted.

“You’re here?” Damian asked.

“Hello, Milady. Do come in,” Sir Ares said.

I don’t know why—and I really don’t want to know why—but these people were somehow in such a good mood. Of course, it wasn’t the same for me.

As I looked up, I made eye contact with Sir Odil. I got startled, but when I saw him nod his head casually, I felt a bit of relief and walked into the room. Regulus wasn’t here.

“Sit down anywhere you’re comfortable. Regulus is late again today, so he’ll probably be here a little later.”

“Ah, yes.”

“Sit here, sit here. Hyung, go sit somewhere else.”

“No, but Damian. You’re being too much. Milady, just sit here…”

Damian kicked the chair where Sir Ares was sitting, and the latter pointed to the other side of him with a tearful expression. The two of them kept patting the seats at either side of them, and I just stared at them for a moment before I went to the other side of the table where Sir Endymion and Sir Odil were sitting.

“Miss Lily, you must have been put into a difficult situation. You were surprised by the sudden department change, right? Are you doing alright?”

“Huh? Um… I’m fine.”

Even dying was better than this, but I couldn’t really say that.

Because I was so nervous, I licked my slightly dry lower lip and bit it slightly, then I nodded. The men around me looked at me with an unreadable expression for some reason.

Come to think of it, Sir Ares said that I was really bad at lying, so it might have been obvious how much I didn’t want to be here.

“…Actually I’m not all that fine, but I’m really fine.”

“What the.”

Damian smirked. No, I’m still mad at you. I gave him the stink eye and then looked away. I’m not totally fine, but I guess I’m fine. I’ve already half-resigned myself to this.

Sir Odil just silently looked at me and didn’t seem to care about my strange answer.

“Here’s the key to the library.”

What he gave me was a silver key with a red gem on it that was the size of a fingernail.

“There’s only one key, so be careful not to lose it.”

Wasn’t it inconvenient to have only one key? What if I lose it? As I thought about going back to my room and putting a spell on it, I slipped the key into my pocket.

“As I’ve said before, you don’t have to do the cleaning. Just make sure to lock the door properly. It doesn’t matter if you need to rest throughout the day, and there’s no special work that you have to do. For your days off, you can have two to three days off per week, so feel free to decide on them and report it to me or Endymion. I’ve made a separate log for the books you’ll be managing…”

The working conditions were much more lax than I thought they’d be, so I spaced out for a moment as I received the documents that Sir Odil handed to me. But you know, something’s odd. There were much fewer books that I’ll be managing than I originally heard. There were only about a hundred books written in the log.

Besides that, there’s practically nothing for me to do, even though the supposed books here were… for the sake of educating the imperial knights, so there were some books that were all difficult to read.

But when I checked, there was a swordsmanship for dummies textbook, then there were also some fairy tales for children on the topic of dreaming to become a warrior.

No matter how much I thought about it, there’s just something wrong here.