022 : Yan JinLong And His Vinegar Tendencies

The life of Lin Mian Mian as a concubine is really very melodramatic.

He had counted all the things that could be considered as pretty stupid and illogical that highly resembles the dramas he saw from free TV. The characters that are too smart to know the ending are as good as dead because they are often acting as cannon fodders. While the stupid characters could survive the cruel world, which is, according to Lin Mian Mian's perspective is really very out of physics.

Like, take this current scene for example.

Lin Mian Mian, acting as the kind and all fragile character, is sitting in a wooden chair decorated with carved flower designs. The work is done very carefully that one could always see the detail written in every shave. The petals that shyly bloomed while the leaves are vigorous - who would have thought that such realistic view could be portrayed in a simple carved chair.

Lin Mian Mian thought that this piece of decoration is good enough to be sold in an auction, or might be in the modern future will be displayed as one of the best ancient works of history in a national museum. As a modern man who did not understand any shit about carvings, he could tell its hundred-dollar value. Just knowing its worth makes his fly-breeding wallet drool.

But that is not the topic. The mind is really good at diverting topics ah.

Going back, Lin Mian Mian is acting as a kind and fragile china that will break once pushed from the edge of the table (by a cat). Everyone, aside from the servants who were always beside him, could not help but to stare at the ethereal beauty with wide eyes, printing such image to the back on their minds that will never be forgotten in their whole life. A goddess like this can never be compared to the ladies inside the harem, even Yin Mei Mei's beauty is a hundredfold steps behind.

However, hidden under this facade is a person who could flip the world by his sarcastic thoughts and joke-instilled ideas. Lin Mian Mian is not some delicate porcelain vase that is only made to become a decoration for people to watch. He is someone far greater, much stronger, which even on this kind of appearance the beautiful one could kill. He is dangerous...

Dangerous to the point of shifting the entire history of this world to a new unknown light.

This is the reason why he thought that living in a life like this is very dramatic. Like the drama in TV, one should set the main character on fire in order to catch the audience (on fire too). This thought is already illogical, topped with a special cream of brain stupidity that made it worst. I mean, why should these main characters act as if the world revolves around them?

If it were Lin Mian Mian, he would use everything to avoid any accidents if possible. He thought of the earlier ideas about the CEO and the assistant scene where the poor is being beaten up by the rich. This is pretty common to those cliché stories that teenagers like to read. Lin Mian Mian liked reading them too but not to the extent of addiction that his standards would start to deviate from the norm.

He thought, if meeting the CEO of the company will bring him misfortune, then, he would just resign and ask the bank for a loan. In this way, he could pay all the debts on a clean way while he could pay the money back to the bank through installments. Of course, through his qualifications, there's no way that he will not be accepted. After all, the assistant will not arrive on his position if he is not smart.

He would use the knowledge that he earned from those four years on an excellent university. His degree will pave way to success. Even though the steps are little and slow, at least, he is doing his job without sacrificing his dignity. He can be accepted to any establishment because he has the ability to attract fortune. He only needed to work hard.

If meeting the CEO of a company will bring him misfortune, then he will just work somewhere away. Maybe he can work as a secretary in some small company or an accountant in a firm, he need not to do any seduction contract before the CEO. That seduction idea... it is as if telling him that there are no ways to earn money but to sell his body.

However, if the CEO would come to that firm, or if they still meet despite working in another city or country, or he would constantly see that person flipping some magazine whenever he goes to the convenience store, one could tell that this is not some bullshit coincidence at all. Of all the places on the world, how large is the probability that these two people will meet in a single place on that exact time?

If it wasn't planned, should we blame destiny?

But man, the main character of the story that was gifted with all intelligence that Einstein will feel ashamed would come into the conclusion that the CEO is secretly in love with them. They will thought that the reason why the CEO follows them everywhere around is because he is too shy to confess and would want to watch the main character from far away.

Shy? Shy? If it were Lin Mian Mian, he would quickly dial the emergency number and call for the police. This is a severe case of stalking! Who cares if he is some CEO of a multibillion company? Who cares if he could buy the whole world? Who cares about that good-looking face? Lin Mian Mian will really damn destiny for giving him such a headache.

This is not love. This is just mere obsession.

Lin Mian Mian never understands this logic. Why would you place any possible mistake to a perfectly logical scene just to start a romance that would end up sweet and cuddly but really very impossible to happen in real life? What makes it so good that the old aunties would fight for the remote every afternoon just to watch the comical skit?

Before, Lin Mian Mian will never understand this notion. But now? He can tell why these scenes are popular.

Lights! Camera! ACTION!

It was a fine day in the palace. The birds are chirping happily while the sky is blue. The afternoon sun has come to shine the world a plenty of orange, yet, today the world seems to be so still. The country is currently at peace and nobody would ever think that the coming months of doom would come. It's just a simple day, fine and good.

However, in a place where most of the scheming can be found, in a place next to the quarters of the empire's leader, a group of three people is having a tea party. To say that it is peaceful would be a lie. After all, only the mad tea party of Mad Hatter will make sense on this scenario.

The three characters can be named as A, B, and C. But the people prefer to call them as Emperor Yan JinLong, General Kong Wen, and the thirteenth concubine, Lin Mian Mian. The three of them are occupying the sides of the stone table with Yan JinLong getting the upper position.

Lin Mian Mian should be occupying the space on his side but somehow the concubine did the otherwise. He sat on one side of the table, sitting opposite to Yan JinLong. They look like a doctor and patient having a heart to heart talk. It's just that the emperor is really mourning by the awkward position while Lin Mian Mian is enjoying the thing thoroughly.

Ah, the feeling is almost bittersweet.

However, the one who is on the most dangerous position is the General Kong Wen. He is the light bulb in this situation ba!

[A/N: Light Bulb means the third party. Poor Kong Wen, even though you only appeared in two chapters, we will never forget you.]

The general checked the square table a hundred times and wondered why it didn't have a fifth corner. Since the emperor and the thirteenth concubine is sitting face to face, where would be the third dog Kong Wen sit? Whatever side he would choose, he will always have the two people on each side. His position in the empire let him have the right to sit side by side by the emperor so he has no worries.

But the thing is, no matter what, he is the one sitting side by side to Lin Mian Mian not the emperor. Even if he sits on the left, or on the right, Kong Wen will always have that one side to the thirteenth concubine. And this position is enough to ignite the vinegar drinking emperor into flames. Just seeing that stiff smile on Yan JinLong's face is enough for Kong Wen to sweat a lot.

[A/N: Lights candle for the poor soul of Kong Wen]

This set-up would be good and okay if it was just a normal situation. However, Kong Wen's personal relationship with Lin Mian Mian made it very difficult. Even though that these two people knows that they are only siblings at heart and nothing more else, nobody can still erase the fact that Kong Wen is once assumed as Lin Mian Mian's engaged pair.

Actually, if ever General Lin did not die in the war, the possibility of the two to get married is high. Rumors are just rumors, but smoke will always appear before the fire. Rumors will not suddenly appear without some sightings. The whole empire knows that Kong Wen is General Lin's direct disciple and also shared the same house as the master. He grew up with Lin Mian Mian.

This history made things very muddled.

Kong Wen tried to ask help. He turned around to call the Minister but Chang Jie only stared at him. It seems that the minister will not care whatever affair these three have, but watching them fight suddenly made him feel good. But the best mood of all is Yan JinLong's plan of making Kong Wen to get jealous by bringing him before Lin Mian Mian to boast.

It backfired instead.

So the situation went like this: Yan JinLong drinking more vinegar, Kong Wen sweating the seventy percent water of his body, and Lin Mian Mian rejoicing the fucked up fuccboi. Now, who is the winner?

Lin Mian Mian's mind is as clear as a crystal and knows the tension hanging in the air. His brotherly connecting with Kong Wen explains that the stoic and hard appearance is only a facade of a dog trembling in the back with fear. On normal times, Lin Mian Mian would just ignore the man because avoiding accidents is a priority. But seeing how things would spice up if he complicate things by flirting to the scared general...

It's to be killed or kill right?

"Ah, what a good weather. It seems that the season has started to change," Yan JinLong said as he placed the cup down with a smile. "Mian-err, what do you think about continuing our honeymoon on the Lotus Pavilion. I heard the scenery is good there."

Lin Mian Mian, who just finished munching a dumpling made a deep smile. "Your Highness, wherever His highness pleases, this concubine will go."

"Then that settles it," Yan JinLong leaned closer to the table with his arms up to the edge of the table. "And Mian-err, didn't I say that you should call me Jin? If you keep me calling as 'His Highness', people would assume that we are not intimate."

"His Highness-"

"Just call me Jin." Yan JinLong never made an order twice, thrice before. But for Lin Mian Mian, he would always remind it to show his deep affection.

"But it's a bit embarrassing~~" Lin Mian Mian whispered, though he made sure that the two men would hear the words. He tried covering his mouth with his sleeves but that did not block the voice. This also made the upper part of his cheeks to be highlighted together with the pink cinnabar that was glowing very beautifully.

"Sure, you would feel shy from the start," Yan JinLong said smoothly. "But as long as we practice saying it, I am sure Mian-err will get used to it."

"But his highne-"

"JIN," Yan JinLong emphasized the term with a forced note on his voice. Both husband and wife are smiling but everyone could tell that they were just acting. The two are fighting for dominance and none of them wanted to step down. Kong Wen tried to erase his presence as little as possible so that people will not notice him.

But how could he escape? With his huge build, far greater than Lin Mian Mian, who will ignore him?

"Jin," Lin Mian Mian grinned. He wanted to roll his eyes and flip his hair like a bitch but he composed his self and faced the general. Kong Wen who felt the eyes of Lin Mian Mian subconsciously shivered.

Kong Wen: Why... why are you looking at me?

Yan JinLong: I wanted to know too. Why are you not looking at me?

"Brother Wen," Lin Mian Mian called out. "It has been a long time since the last time we met."

"Un," Kong Wen replied. Just 'un' in fear that the emperor would suddenly slice his head in half if he says something unwanted.

"I am really grateful to brother Wen. Without you, I would not know what to do," Lin Mian Mian made a tear-drying motion by his one hand, even though there were no tears on his eyes. Kong Wen's eyes widened.

Kong Wen: Oi! Don't phrase it like that!

"Ahe-he he," Kong Won dry-laughed. "Well, we are friends after all. Friends should help each other."

"I know. And I like to give you a hundred thanks for that," Lin Mian Mian made a very compassionate expression you could even see heralds singing above his head. He shifted his attention to the sour emperor and smiled.

"But you know Jin? I treated Brother Wen as more than friends," Lin Mian Mian added.

Yan JinLong's eyes suddenly darkened. Kong Wen who just took a sip on the tea on that time spurted the contents of the drink on the side. After throwing the water out, he coughed out his throat after being chocked. He tried to be silent but the wheezing of his pained tonsils blocked him.

"Brother Wen, are you all right?" Lin Mian Mian found the coughing general amusing, though he still showed a rather concerned expression.

He reached out to pat the man's back when suddenly a flash appeared before them. The hand that was hanging in the air ready to land unto the back of the general was caught by the emperor who suddenly appeared between them. He is holding the wrist of Lin Mian Mian with a grip.

"Would this concubine want to tell me what he meant by 'more than friends'?" Yan JinLong asked while tightening the grip of his hold.

Lin Mian Mian can feel the pain on his wrist and looked up to see the emperor. Yan JinLong is already enduring the mistake he brought his self but he is now totally pissed. The glint on his eyes showed an aggressive shine that if only looks could kill, Lin Mian Mian would be dead right now...

Kong Wen is silent but he can see Lin Mian Mian hurting. As the big brother, he is always concerned to the weak-bodied child. He wanted to have the emperor to loosen the grip when Yan JinLong looked at him fiercely. Kong Wen had seen the eyes of enemies, and the eyes of death. However, the thing that he could see on his eyes is an endless loop of rage and jealousy.

One look is enough to warn him.

"Mian-err, what do you mean by 'more than friends'?" Yan JinLong asked once again.

But the stubborn Lin Mian Mian only shut his mouth. He is just obviously joking and would adhere to such command quickly but his pride did not allow him. Yan JinLong never hurt him like this before. Even though those humping hurts his chrysanthemum, it is only part of the process. It was unintentional.

Yet, now, Yan JinLong showed his dominance through strength.

Did he not promise to not hurt Lin Mian Mian no matter what happens?

Receiving no answer, Yan JinLong shook his head. This wife of his is really hard to please. He had given everything that he could give. He is gentle and romantic; his creativity in courting had reached to a master level. Yet, this person that should be reciprocating the love did not even bat an eye to him. He liked him. He loved him.

Why is this person constantly hurting him?

It is painful. He did not want to have his dominance through strength but Yan JinLong had reached the limit. After all, he is the emperor. Even though Lin Mian Mian weighted the ninety percent on his heart (with ten percent divided to his mother and to the empire), he is still a leader that should be respected. He isn't a joke that Lin Mian Mian could just trample on.

And this is what Lin Mian Mian forget to realize.

The emperor will never give things up. But for now, with a stubborn wife who refused to answer, all he could do is to take command. He removed the grip from Lin Mian Mian's wrist; however, he crouched down to carry the wife up. Lin Mian Mian was scared witless when his body was lifted up. He quickly clung to the emperor's neck.

"This wife deserved a punishment," Yan JinLong looked at Lin Mian Mian with a smirk before looking at the little servant. "Do not disturb."

The emperor left with the main character on his arms. Now, Lin Mian Mian realized that like those stupid protagonists, he his self also had fallen to the trap.

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