Chapter 81 - An Epiphany

Fuck. 

He regretted it. 

Why did he have to let his mouth run head first without thinking it through? 

Jian Yu felt his heart constricted, like it was tied in thin silk thread and dangled in midair after asking so many questions. His blood thrumped in his veins and his heart's nerves were tightly clamped, unable to beat. 

He was terrified of the answers he might hear, but there was no way he could back out. There was no way he could not ask. 

Unknown to Jian Yu, there was another reason why he was feeling this way. 

The air he was inhaling was nauseous and poisonous as the pheromones exuded by Zeke were also playing a role in trying to surpass the Beta. The thickness and heaviness of the Alpha's scent was coiling and choking the Beta without him realizing as Jian Yu was too caught up with the moment to notice that he had to get away from the Alpha. 

If Jian Yu ever felt small and crushed, all of it was also ȧssisted by the pressure of Zeke's Alpha pheromones. They were trying to control and make the other submit if not for Zeke's effort in trying to hold himself back. 

"That-- That's not…" Zeke actually heaved out a heavy sigh and Jian Yu deflated instantly. He felt his whole world plummeted down. 

Jian Yu, for as long as he had lived, had never once wanted to hope for something. He was afraid of the outcomes, he dreaded it. Everything was much better if he thought of the worst case scenario instead of hoping. 

When confessed, Jian Yu was flattered that someone outstanding like Zeke would fall for such a monotonous person like him. It was like he was in a dream. 

Jian Yu was like any other person, he too had held delusions like other youths, be it Omega or Beta. He often comforted himself, reminding himself that an Alpha like them liked a Beta like him. 

He wanted to believe he was a lucky exception. 

"Look, I'm sorry," Zeke seemed to be struggling to get any words out. "I don't think now is the right time--" 

"What the hell do you mean by that?" The younger man gritted out. He had moved his trembling hands to clutch the collar of Zeke's shirt. 

He needed a clear answer, he was desperate for one. At least, speak clearly and crush that hope implanted in him! 

"You don't understand--" This time, a growl seeped out of Zeke's lips. The Alpha inside him was unhappy, furious that someone inferior was challenging him. He wanted to dominate, wanted the person in front of him to submit. 

He could feel his fangs lengthening, forming its shape made to mate. The last thing he wanted was not to mark Jian Yu without his consent, even though, he knew a Beta couldn't hold a permanent mark, but still, marking without consent was just the same as forcible violation, a sėxuȧŀ ȧssault! 

It was no different than forcing himself on someone unwilling! 

Zeke struggled to keep his Alpha in check, chaining him down. But the situation wasn't helping at all when the Beta across from him kept coming onto him like this. 

"Now is not the time!" The sentence burst out of his mouth, louder than he had expected and Zeke felt a tinge of guilt when he saw Jian Yu flinched back at his tone. "Back away! You are triggering m--!!!"

"How selfish of you…!" The silverette choked out. His heart was crumbling and his world shattered but he preserved to listen to the end.

Those confessions. Those words had become shackles. And just like that, they followed him like a curse without the intention of disappearing. And Jian Yu wished-- he hoped that Zeke would at least have the heart to destroy and throw it away. 

"Grrr…" 

Everything was too fast for the silver-haired Beta to catch up with everything. In such a short expanse of time, he picked up the scent of rage and chocolate and something else like some sort of forest fire before an arm pushed across his shoulder and slammed him into the wall. 

Searing hot pain shot down his spine and his eyelids fluttered trying to make sense of his suddenly blurred vision. 

Two bright jade eyes glared at him. 

"Zeke?" Jian Yu's voice cracked. He remained frozen and the rational corner of his mind told him that he had fuċkėd something up. Was it fear he was feeling? The Beta wasn't sure anymore. 

When a hand curled around his throat, that was the moment Jian Yu was positive that he was terrified. Terrified of the slit in Zeke's eyes and the glimpse of fangs peeking out from his bottom lips. 

The normally distinguished gentleman across from him looked like a feral beast. 

When the feral Alpha leant towards him, Jian Yu closed his eyes instinctively. He missed the split second how those eyes softened at the sight of him being afraid. 

The crazy animal inside Zeke purred at how the Beta submitted, feeling much superior for finally being able to put the other in his place which made Zeke feel a little nauseous at this sight. 

And when he looked at those plump lips, he really wanted to know what it felt like. 

His hand went from the Beta's throat to the back of his head and took a fistful of the white hair. The back of Jian Yu's skull was already aching from where it had hit the wall and the hard grip on his hair made him gasp. 

He popped his closed eyes and started to see two slits of jade colored eyes stared back at him. They were so close that Jian Yu could feel the harsh breath coming from Zeke.

Ba-dump. Ba-dump. 

His heart thumped frantically that he could hear it inside his ears. With them locking gazes, Jian Yu noticed how Zeke was slowly leaning in. His eyes flickered towards the fangs jutting out of the bottom lips had Jian Yu trembling. 

But he made absolutely no action to move. 

'Is Zeke going to kiss me?'