CH 43

Violet’s eyes, whenever she looked at Roen, Aileen, Mikhail, the servants of the residence.

That look in her eyes that contained so much hatred, as though covered with poison and thorns.

The poison and thorns served to protect herself, but in the end, they would only hurt herself.

“…You were never a bad person.”

“That’s easy for you to say, huh. How is it possible for you to say such a thing? That my actions were not evil… That I’m not a bad person?”

“……”

Laughable, really.

Even if she was a victim, it did not change the fact that she did malicious things to others.

The sea of people who lost their normal lives due to Violet’s whims would most definitely snort if they ever heard Roen’s words.

Yeon Ha-yoon, too, was well aware that Violet was a bad person.

“…It’s not easy to say.”

“Then the whole thing must just be a joke to you. Well, there was a time when everything was…”

…hell for me, yet it meant nothing to you.

Violet thought that Roen’s apology was much too light.

There’s no way in my hell that I’d let you be rewarded for such an apology. The time spent being hurt by others and hurting others is considered a bygone time in the past only by you.

This whole thing that pushed me into the abyss…

It was a terribly selfish feeling. But she knew that such selfishness was the essence of her being.

Laughter spilled through Violet’s lips. It was so difficult to deal with a burst of many emotions.

“Why are you apologizing to me? Why now?”

“……”

“I wasn’t, I wasn’t a bad person, you say… Hah, hahaha. I’m not bad, I didn’t do anything wrong…”

Said this person, who was the very person who mocked and ridiculed her during the time that she wanted someone—anyone—to be on her side. This person, here and now, who only looked at another person’s wounds from afar.

“…I’m sorry.”

Forcing the mouth that would not open, Roen once again apologized.

Plik, plik.

The overwhelming emotions that could no longer be contained came out in the form of tears.

With a vicious look on her face before, Violet never once cried. She had just cursed at everyone with poison in her eyes.

She had built a more solid wall around her.

“Why? You always said that before, right? That I just need to be good. Because I’m bad, not good. I’m bad for not being able to treat that girl kindly, I’m bad for tearing her clothes to pieces, I’m bad for throwing her things out and for harming the people she cherishes.”

“……”

“Because I didn’t try, I’ve amounted to only this much. She worked hard to produce the most brilliant results, yet I…”

“……”

“I’m a villainess, so it’s natural that I’m bad. That’s what I was told.”

The exasperated voice stopped speaking.

Don’t say anything more. Don’t feel any more pity for me. I should not show my emotions. I still have not changed…

Violet bit her lower lip. Her mouth kept moving on its own even though she had tried to suppress herself over and over again.

“Is it only… Is it not such a huge deal that it’ll end in only a few mere apologies?”

“……”

“Many times, I wished for you all to die. I prayed each and every day that you would die a more painful death than I would, that you would become as miserable as me.  I wished for you all to lie face down and grovel beneath my feet. I wished for you to crawl on the floor, to say that you were wrong, to collapse miserably and suffer.”

As Violet continued, any semblance of a smile disappeared from Roen’s expression. She talked about such curses, and the hatred in her voice cut deep.

“So, what did you do wrong?”

And as she asked this question, the emotions swirling behind Violet’s inexplicably complicated.

Fidgeting with the teacup in his hands despite himself, Roen’s lips opened and closed many times before he finally spoke.

“…For saying that what you didn’t do was your fault.”

“……”

“For not listening to you or believing you because I was prejudiced and called you a liar—”

“……”

“…And for making you wicked. Everything.”

Violet thought that Roen’s apology was flimsy, but as he continued speaking, his voice started shaking heavily towards the end.

“I won’t do those things again. I’m not saying this lightly. So at least once, I thought we should talk and…”

It was a crude apology and excuse.

There was once a time when Violet longed for her family’s affection. She hoped to gain their acknowledgement, hoped that they would come to regret it all.

She wished for the day that they would apologize.

Looking further into the resentment she was feeling, it was a fact that her family was the one who created this resentment.

“…Young Lord.”

Violet uttered the term of address as if she was chewing on the words.

“What is it that you want?”

As she asked, Violet’s expression was indescribable.

Roen, who had investigated Violet’s whereabouts and the people she was involved with, finally realized what he had done to his younger sister.

“You’ve apologized now. And then what? Do you want me to forgive you?”

“……”

“So, should we go back to how it was in the old days? Haha, hoho, just laugh like that? Ah. I wonder when we ever did such a thing in the past… Then instead, would you like us to imitate a harmonious family? Or perhaps, you just want to be unburdened by your own guilt?”

“……”

“After coming here and apologizing like this, what do you want from me?”