Chapter 1: Strands of Fate
The war had started at the behest of the elves when they were still one people. The First Children spoke of the great devourer, the herald of the end that would consume all things and leave this world a shriveled, cold husk of rock. They predicted that Mana, the god-gift which flowed through all things, the giver of life and the hope of the future, would be ended by this grave new threat.
- On the Cataclysm by an unknown Quassian Scholar circa 103 AC
The place between dreams and control is one where the imagination is free to run riot. In my dream state, I had flown over vast endless plains of grass filled with giant majestic animals, walled cities filled with stout armored knights, and a great blazing desert populated by worms that could swallow small suburbs whole. A cold breeze played across from the open window, bringing with it the sounds of an awakening city. The radio blurted out the morning news, the announcers' sonorous voice filling the emptiness of my small single room.
Lately, the dreams have been growing more vivid, more real, I mused as I forced myself to get out of bed. I almost tripped over a pile of books in my rush to the sink to brush my teeth, only correcting myself by flailing my hands to keep balance like some demented cartoon character. Staring into the mirror, I turned once more to the dreams; how stimulating would it be to live in a world like that?
After my morning toilet and getting dressed, I had a quick search in the mini-fridge in my room. The investigation revealed a half-eaten chocolate bar and a loaf with mold merrily growing on it. I quickly scarfed the bar down while hurriedly placing the moldy loaf in my bag along with some books that I would need for the day.
Moving to the door to leave, I noticed a new letter from the management company of the building. I already knew it was going to be asking me to pay this month’s rent which was two weeks late. My last job didn't pay as well as it had promised, so I would have to beg or borrow money from friends this month; or, heaven forbid, from my parents. Always I wondered how the management could charge so much for such a terrible room. There was a leak in the roof and the room was permanently damp in winter.
Making sure to lock the door, I decided to take the long way to school through the park. I passed a jogger going the opposite direction who was determined on destroying their eardrums with the loud music blaring from her headphones. For a moment I could be sure that I heard the sound of an army marching to the beat of war...when the wild neigh of a warhorse was abruptly replaced by the harsh honking of a car in reality as a stray cat crossed the road.
Snapping out of my episode, I crossed into the park and was greeted by familiar birdsong. Few people used the park at this time in the morning, and for a few precious moments, it felt like this section of the park was truly mine. Lately, I had the recurring notion that my life had been spiraling out of control. My recent break-up had done more damage to my confidence than I cared to admit, and it had started to affect my studies and my part-time job. I replayed in my mind the phone conversation with her again, my curt "Okay," before putting the phone down. Should I have begged instead? Bought a present with my non-existent money? Round and round the scenarios swirled.
Torturing myself with these thoughts I continued walking through the park until I reached a small pond. Ducks swam lazily across the brown surface, quacking and occasionally diving down to feed, tufted bottoms in the air. I noticed a few indistinct shapes of fish lurking in the murky depths. Reaching into my bag for the moldy loaf, I began feeding the ducks and fish.
A frenzy of activity whirled wherever I threw the bread, and I smiled as two birds squabbled over a larger piece. I was just about to throw another piece when a large shadow appeared beneath the birds, a shape growing so suddenly I was forced to step back in surprise. Something flew towards me and I instinctively closed my eyes. I could have sworn I felt water graze my cheek, but when I opened my eyes there was nothing but the peaceful scene of ducks and fish. Shaken, I quickly threw the rest of the loaf into the pond and took off.
Feeling disorientated I hurried to my lecture, making it with a little time to spare. I had few friends and none of them had chosen this particular course, so I found my customary corner near the back and sat down to prepare. My mind began wandering again to the dreams and my encounter in the park. Overactive imagination, I thought to myself. Too rich a diet of video games and fantasy books.
The history lecturer’s sonorous voice, as it had done so many times in the past, brought me back to reality. I loved the subject and had already looked over the section of the text we would be studying, but the lecturer on the podium’s voice was just so monotonous. Ever since primary school, I had been gifted with great teachers who made it one of the more enjoyable subjects taught, but it seemed that I had lucked out in higher education. It required memorization of facts and dates, but the main difficulty was giving these things life through good prose that answered the limited number of questions that could be posed in a concise manner.
Here again, my mind was wandering. An errant thought drew me to picture fields of the most brilliant emerald grass, a viridian sea swaying softly in the wind...
Grass...? I could hear the whispering susurration of each individual blade dancing to the cool spring breeze. The taste of the crisp clean air pervaded my imagination, a striking contrast to the acrid aftertaste of the city. I saw a small hill with what looked like a large acacia tree overlooking it, a vision that would make for the most perfect of landscape pictures. I yearned to go there, and one step later I was...back in the lecture hall as the lecturer continued listing the reasons for the fall of an empire.
I listened with half an ear to the lecturer, occasionally casting a glance at a girl a few seats away on my right. Hair like burnt gold cascaded around her shoulders and framed a heart-shaped face with eyes of cornflower blue. A cute button nose, a little upturned, was perfectly positioned above blossom soft pink lips. I knew her name as I had heard her friends greet her once before, but I never had the courage to introduce myself. Sighing, I entered an almost zen-like autopilot for the rest of the lecture, my subconscious taking in all the relevant data.
A look of puzzlement crossed her face for a fraction of a fraction of a second, as if she was analyzing all that stood before her. A hesitant smile tinged with sorrow grew across her face and once again I felt my soul rise with joy as tears tracked their way across my face.
Lifting my face she spoke unto me, “But, let it not be said that there is no justice without mercy. Though it will cost me greatly, you will be given a day to face the trials to come. I am Avaria.”
The last utterance was said with such lament that I was filled with nothing but a deep shame; a feeling that a being such as myself was unworthy of such benevolence. Slowly I felt the warmth start to fade from my soul as my dream began to fade back to reality. The peace was followed by a sudden and jarring sensation of falling...
The idyllic dream and sense of complete fulfillment were then utterly shattered as tendrils of shadow ripped through what felt like infinite universes...stabbing into my very soul, and drawing me into a gaping void of utter darkness. Flailing my arms and legs around, I sought a way to escape whatever dire fate awaited me. The tendrils originated from a giant maw that grew ever closer as it drew me steadily in. I struggled more, howling animal noises as I devolved into an absolute panic. I sought the calm within the storm. A flash of understanding swept across my mind as the tendrils bored ever deeper into my being; I was Avaria’s chosen. 'The goddess would surely not abandon me...' I clutched to this fleeting hope before it was swiftly snuffed out as I was finally pulled with a sudden force within the maw.
My being was stretched and compressed before finally being spat again into the void. Darkness was so absolute that it was more than just the absence of light. As primal fear finally overcame me I sensed a consuming presence. I could feel it breathing behind my neck, yet suffusing all around me; a paradox of being. Yet the embers of divine revelation still flickered, and somewhere I found it utter the word,
“Who...?”
A voice rumbled with laughter which betrayed an infinite slowness of eons and the volume of a meteor impact.
“What are you...Are you a god?” I squeaked as fear once again ruled my soul.
Laughter sounded again that evoked images of barren deserts and the death throes of dying stars.
“I am not a God,” it intoned, followed by a pause which held the time of the rise and fall of empires. “I am a higher Truth. The final Truth of all things.” It spoke as I felt my very sense of self shredded, rewritten and analyzed again and again.
“Avaria is a mere mortal and flawed concept. She has Chosen and Claimed, but in her mercy broke the Rules. She thought to prepare you from my brothers and I, to gift you enough sweet precious time to ready yourself for the great trials. What a foolish child, to think that we would not notice. No respite can be given in the rules of the great game. I claim you now, child of Earth,”the voice exclaimed with all the dread of a dying world.
Sibilant whispers skittered across my mind intruding upon my consciousness, shaping it so that I might better understand the being and prevent my mind from shattering against the cliffs of insanity I now stood upon.
The whispers, echoes of the great being, spoke directly in my mind with voices like sharpened glass. Every word was a lesson in pain.
“We will gift you nothing but our curse. We care nothing for your success or failure. We will simply try again as this moment will fold into itself once more. Know utterly the futility of your existence. However, we will curse you with that which so often shapes mortal existence. I give you pain, as a small reminder that here you exist for a blinking of an eye to the eternity of the cosmos. Take this and know a fleeting joy, mortal. The pain I give to you, you will give to others, as is the nature of your being. The pain will guide your growth in your new world, guide your understanding. An endless spiral of lost energy to chaos. As it once was, so shall it all be again,” intoned the being.
Then an agony filled me across long moments, flaying the fibers of my soul. All thoughts of the goddess burned away. A moment stretched across infinity. And all I could do was hear the hollow laughter of a thousand uncaring gods.The original appearance of this chapter can be found at Ñøv€lß1n.