Chapter 52: Heavens Above (2)
Discord: /translatingnovice
The night passed, and dawn broke. Then, I witnessed something extraordinary.
Whoosh-
The stone saber I had made for the imaginary Kim Young-hoon, which I had split in half, began to float in the air.
'Uh...?'
A faint figure started to reappear. The figure I had split in two. Each half of the figure, now holding the upper and lower parts of the saber, began to grow new bodies on their opposite sides.
Wriggle, wriggle-
New bodies fully formed, and the reality of the two Kim Young-hoons became clear again. This time as well, they were Kim Young-hoon.
The two Kim Young-hoons, each holding a saber, aimed at me. Their transparent eyes asked me to stop my futile thoughts and engage in a duel.
"Heh, hehehe..."
I felt saliva dripping from my mouth. My eyes bloodshot, I chuckled and stood up shakily, holding the stone sword.
"Hahaha...!"
I rushed towards the two Kim Young-hoons.
Crazy or not, what did it matter? Yes, let's just play and think later.
It was another six months before I managed to defeat the two Kim Young-hoons. I roamed around, engaging in battles with them. Finally, I elevated my Severing Mountain Swordsmanship to the extreme and succeeded in cutting down both Kim Young-hoons simultaneously.
There lay the bisected corpses of the two Kim Young-hoons, still smiling eerily.
"...Aren't you resentful that I've cut you down?"
Despite being bisected, the two Kim Young-hoons shook their heads. Seemingly, they were happy to see my martial arts improve. From the bisected bodies of the two Kim Young-hoons, new bodies began to sprout again.
Wriggle, wriggle...
Now, the two Kim Young-hoons have become four. Each of them was armed and surrounded me. The fight was about to get even tougher.
"Alright, let's do this!"
Months passed again. Whenever the time was right, I held rituals towards the heavens, and each time they failed, I, along with the now six Kim Young-hoons, would demolish the altar.
"Why! Why! Why!"
I screamed towards the heavens, smashing the altar with the Kim Young-hoons.
"Why won't you grant me permission... Heavens...!"
Why still, still...!
If this much sincerity isn't enough, then what more do you want from me!
Boom!
The sixth Kim Young-hoon swung his saber, shattering the last piece of the altar. I thanked him and sat down, exhausted.
"...Kim Hyung."
I spoke to the Kim Young-hoons.
"I know. I've lost my mind right now. But in a way, I'm both insane and rational."
The repeated failures and the loneliness of not being able to converse had led to these illusions. I pondered over my feelings and formed a hypothesis about the Kim Young-hoons in front of me.
"...You all are the Kim Young-hoons I remember from my past lives, aren't you?"
At my words, all six Kim Young-hoons nodded. Excluding the Kim Young-hoon from my first life without regression and this current cycle, they were the six Kim Young-hoons from the six cycles of regressions. The ones I remembered and longed for.
"...I'm sorry for dragging the departed into my delusions."
They smiled wryly, saying it's just my imagination, what does it matter. I chuckled and grasped my sword.
"...I'm always grateful for playing with me."
Blink
I closed and opened my eyes. Their figures vanished, leaving six floating stone sabers. Blinking again, they transformed back into six Kim Young-hoons.
7 years passed.
"Heavens... grant me strength."
Heavens, please accept me...
Whoosh-
Once again, I clenched my teeth at the sight of the obstructing dark clouds.
'Still...'
Still, I am not granted permission by the heavens.
It was different from when I transitioned from first-rate to the peak. Back then, though there was an indescribable huge wall blocking me, I could feel the existence beyond that wall and devoted my life to breaking through.
But now, it's not a huge wall. It's like being thrown alone into an endless space. There's no wall, nothing at all. I can't even see the next realm.
When will the heavens permit me? There's no promise, just me clinging to the cold and lofty mercy of the heavens, waiting for the next realm.
'...I must try.'
Crack...
My fingers, imbued with Gang Qi, gripped the stone altar made by the Earth Dwelling Method, leaving imprints.
'Yes, I must try.'
No matter how much the heavens ignore me.
Even if I am just a struggling bug.
Until they accept me...
I must keep enduring.
Yes, if not today, then tomorrow, and if not tomorrow, then the day after.
Until they accept me.
I will keep trying, over and over...!
"Heavens above... I am waiting...!"
Boom!
I stamped my foot.
The altar crumbled.
Beside me, six Kim Young-hoons, each performing their own ritual dance, assisted me as we furiously pounded the altar together.
"I will definitely reach you..!"
Swoosh!
At some point.
I was able to overcome the six Kim Young-hoons.
The heavens would still not permit me.
All I did was swing around pieces of stone.
Even that was just a figment of my imagination.
Were the Kim Young-hoons before me the real ones?
No, they weren't.
If they were the real Kim Young-hoons, they would have shot a single Gang Sphere and blown me away.
What I was fighting were just Kim Young-hoons supported by my imagination.
But...
I have now overcome all the Kim Young-hoons I have longed for.
Now, whom do I have to fight?
Who do I have to compete with to express this torment?
That's when it happened.
Wriggle, wriggle...
The illusions of the six Kim Young-hoons I had overcome.
Their corpses began to squirm.
And from those wriggling of corpses, something began to grow.
It was the leader of the Shadow Guards and its members.
"..Eh?"
The Shadow Guards grew from Kim Young-hoons' corpses, and the six Kim Young-hoons squirmed and grew again.
Now, along with the six Kim Young-hoons, the Shadow Guards have appeared.
"...Haha, not bad."
The combined attack of masters is better the more there are.
Drooling from my mouth, I shouted.
"Come at me! All of you, come at me! Fine, I will make the weapons for you!"
I formed a hand seal, made stone weapons for the Shadow Guards and Kim Young-hoons, infused them with Gang Qi, and threw them.
They took my weapons and all rushed at me.This chapter is updated by nov(e)(l)biin.com
Every time I fought, I felt a tingling pleasure in my head, blowing away the pain and despair of my ritual failures.
"Hahaha!"
It's so fun!
So very fun!
I am enjoying this!!!
My intent was somehow a dark blue hue.
"As you said, Master, sincerity can reach the heavens... I will give it my all."
Not yet.
I can't give up yet.
Even if I do give up, it will be after I've dedicated this entire life to trying.
Because there have been too many who have pushed me forward in my many lives...
Many figures surrounded me.
Some held weapons, others didn't.
There were Kim Young-hoons, subordinates from my time as the Wulin Alliance chief advisor, from the time of the Palace of Heavenly Demons, the Shadow Guards...
And my disciples,
And my master.
Only then did I realize.
I haven't gone mad.
I wasn't crazy. I was just longing for them so much that I called them to me.
The many people in my memory were merely projected before my eyes according to my will.
"...I will not give up."
I said, looking at everyone.
Looking at the Kim Young-hoons.
Looking at my disciples.
Looking at my master.
"For the sake of not forgetting your help...!"
I gathered the ritual utensils, adorned the altar, and prepared for this night's ritual.
Heavens above.
Heavens above.
Grant me strength.
Allow me.
I cried out, looking at the sky filled with dark clouds.
But the heavens remained silent.
Without any response, just silently looking down at me.
It was a failure again.
But I did not give up.
"Heavens above... Grant me strength..."
"Heavens above... Allow me..."
I earnestly prayed, performing and praying through the ritual over and over.
The heavens did not look at me, but now I also stopped looking at the heavens.
Instead, each time I performed the ritual, I looked at the numerous figures around me.
Those who had pushed me forward.
The many connections who had supported and sustained me.
Even if I can't meet them anymore, they are with me in my heart.
"Heavens above..."
I will not give up.
Because I am not alone.
From a certain point, I stopped smashing the altar in anger after the ritual ended.
Instead, I focused on gathering stones to build the altar higher and stronger.
My altar grew taller.
Eventually, it would reach the sky.
As time passed, the figures surrounding me became more and more distinct.
As the tower grew taller and stronger,
The six Kim Young-hoons who fought with me, the Shadow Guards, several peak masters,
And my disciples.
Over 500 disciples, the Shadow Guards, Kim Young-hoons, elders and protectors of various great sects.
The loyalists I fought with in the Jin Clan.
They all came out with weapons and sparred with me.
At first, it was overwhelming, but after a few years, I was equally fighting against them all.
As my skills improved, the figures participating in my sparring increased.
Most were martial artists wielding weapons.
But also the petty bandits, water bandits, and unorthodox sect martial artists I had captured.
Even the first-rate masters I had sparred with, the number almost reached two thousand as the range expanded.
35 years into regression.
25 years since starting the Seven Stars Ritual.
How many thousands of times have I failed the ritual?
'I can't even remember.'
But I sense that I will not be broken.
I am not alone.
'How can I be alone with so many accompanying me...!'
"Heavens above, look."
Humans cannot reach the heavens alone.
But no human is ever completely alone.
Within the many connections and relationships,
Inside 'us', humans are born and live.
"Heavens above, you may not look at me."
But I am not composed of just myself.
Therefore, the heavens cannot ignore 'us'.
I now ascend the giant altar, almost as tall as a four-story building.
Thousands of weapons float in the air below the altar.
When I blink, the weapons are all held by numerous figures.
Besides those figures holding weapons, thousands more without weapons look at me.
Some might call me a madman who creates imaginary figures in his madness.
From that perspective, I am indeed a madman.
But from the perspective of longing for people, am I really mad?
Every human is born, grows, and dies within humanity.
People inevitably seek others.
Is it madness for people to crave others?
For people to crave life?
For people to yearn for higher places for that?
"Heavens above, I cannot give up now."
I murmured, looking at the countless figures.
I know.
They are all illusions created by my loneliness, longing, and yearning.
But if I can only break free from the cycle of regression and fate,
I can find them all again, retrieving my life as it was.
And for that.
I must ascend higher!
As I ascend the altar, I shout towards the heavens.
"Heavens above, look! I will not give up! I cannot give up!"
So, grant me strength!
So, allow me!
The ritual began.
Translator Notes: Our Eun-hyun needs a break.
Also, please don't post spoilers unless asked for, even if it is censored. Thank you.
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