CH 36

After finishing his business activities, Tang Ziyou returned home. Taking advantage of his leisure time, he read 《The Barefoot Boy》 book that Qu Wenyi had given him.

The book was very thin. It was about a boy who had nothing, from nothing to slowly possessing gorgeous clothes, a precious crown and golden boots.

He carried his clothes, held on to the crown, and walked carefully every step, lest the dust on the ground would stain his boots and clothes.

Someone ran past him and smiled to make him hurry up, but he cared about his gorgeous clothes and boots, and walked slowly, until the people who had walked side by side couldn’t be seen.

Later, the boy was too tired to walk. He took off his clothes and gave them to passers-by.

He found that he was walking fast.

So he gave the crown to the playing children and the boots to the beggars.

He gave up all his clothes, only to find that he was walking faster and faster, and he could even run quickly again.

He passed by one landscape after another, and those landscapes became his most gorgeous clothes.

He crossed one river after another, and those rivers became his boots on the waves.

On the last page of the book, there was a line of Qu Wenyi’s words: Moving forward with a heavy load, it is better to go with ease. (负重前行，不如轻松而往)

Tang Ziyou felt that what she said was reasonable. He didn’t think much. He put the book aside and was just about to make a cup of tea for himself when he heard a knock on the door.

Tang Ziyou went down the stairs and opened the door. It was Gu Jiuxing.

“Why are you here?”

“The New Year is almost coming. I will take you home for the New Year.” Gu Jiuxing smiled.

Tang Ziyou’s hand holding the door tightened, but he didn’t expect that he would use the word home.

“I’m not going.” He said, “I will celebrate the New Year by myself this year.”

“How can this work? There is no one who celebrates the New Year, as I said before, this year you go home for the New Year. If you don’t go back this time, Grandma should pick you up in person.”

When he mentioned his grandma, Tang Ziyou didn’t insist anymore. He went back to his room to pack a few clothes and left with Gu Jiuxing.

As the New Year approached, the streets were full of joy and the trees were also covered with red lanterns of different sizes, which looked very lively.

Tang Ziyou looked at it, feeling somewhat unspeakable in his heart.

It was another New Year. His family hadn’t increased. Instead, there was none.

Gu Jiuxing saw him looking out the window and said to him, “My parents will be back after a few days. You haven’t seen them yet, you can see them this time.”

Tang Ziyou had actually met them. In his last life, he met Gu Jiuci’s parents this New Year.

Gu’s parents were very good. Mother Gu took his hand and said to him gently, “You will be our child in the future, so you have to live with Xiao Jiu.”

He nodded happily at that time and Mother Gu also gave him a gift.

Tang Ziyou couldn’t help but feel a little lost when he thought of this. In a sense, Gu’s family was really a good family, what his ideal home looked like.

“You and Xiao Jiu, haven’t made up yet?” Gu Jiuxing spoke again.

Tang Ziyou nodded, “We have broken up.”

“But I think Xiao Jiu really wants to get back together with you.”

“It’s just a moment of anger.”

“It’s been almost half a year,” Gu Jiuxing said, “It’s not considered anger anymore.”

“Brother, are you trying to help him persuade me?” Tang Ziyou asked.

Gu Jiuxing smiled, turned the steering wheel, “Do you remember that once you woke up in the hospital, you asked me, did I put you on the bed?”

Tang Ziyou certainly remembered that at that time Gu Jiuxing also persuaded him to take good care of his body.

“I didn’t answer your question positively at the time. I just asked you to take care of yourself, because it wasn’t me who did that, and the person who did it, he didn’t want you to know that he did it.”

“Is it Gu Jiuci?”

“En.” Gu Jiuxing said in a low voice, “At that time, Xiao Jiu could vaguely feel your good feelings towards him. He didn’t think he could respond to you, so he didn’t want to give you other good feelings and increase your liking for him. So he left after I got to the hospital and told me before leaving, don’t say it was him if you asked.”

Tang Ziyou lowered his eyes unconsciously, thinking this in his heart.

“Xiao You, did you know that when you two got engaged in the first place, I actually didn’t agree.”

Tang Ziyou looked at him in surprise and saw Gu Jiuxing turned his head, looking at himself then smiled.

“I know my brother too well. This forced engagement will only arouse his disgust, so I went to Grandma. I hope that Grandma can change the person.”

“But Grandma said, you like Xiao Jiu, and Xiao Jiu,” Gu Jiuxing said with a deeper smile, “Xiao Jiu doesn’t want me to be engaged like this.”

“I always thought it was weird, how could he agree? How could he agree to this kind of thing with his character? I didn’t know until after I finished talking with Grandma. It was because of me.”

“It’s rare that my brother did it for me, so I didn’t stop it. I hope you can have a good result.”

At the red light, Gu Jiuxing stopped the car and looked at Tang Ziyou, “Xiao You, in his life, which is not long but not short, I have been with him all the time. I’m his half parent. I want him to live happily, but I forgot to teach him to be honest and cherish. This is not only his fault but also my fault. I apologize to you.”

Tang Ziyou shook his head, “You are not wrong. Gu Jiuci and I have made it clear about this matter. It is me who is wrong, not him.”

“How come, I know you two better than anyone else. Of course, you are wrong and he is not all right. If he can be a little honest and know how to cherish the person in front of him, you two won’t be as far as this step today.”

“It doesn’t matter anymore.”

“Then can you tell me how would you forgive him?” Gu Jiuxing asked.

Tang Ziyou looked at him, “Do you think I don’t forgive him?”

He sighed and whispered, “I forgave him a long time ago. I just don’t want to repeat the same mistakes.”

“Why do you repeat the same mistakes? You like him and he likes you. How can you repeat the same mistakes?”

“Brother,” Tang Ziyou asked him, “Have you ever liked someone?”

Gu Jiuxing shook his head, “No.”

“Even if you have, you won’t become what you don’t like because of your liking.” Tang Ziyou smiled, “However, I changed my appearance because of my liking. I’m not resisting Gu Jiuci, I’m just afraid I once again become something I don’t know again.”

Gu Jiuxing understood. He didn’t expect this to be the reason. Looking at Tang Ziyou, he couldn’t speak for a while.

After a long time, he said, “No matter what you look like, you are always smart child and adorable in my eyes.”

“From the first time I saw you, I knew that you were a very good child, and I still feel that way until now.”

He looked at Tang Ziyou and touched his hair, “You will always be my favourite brother.”

* * *

Gu Jiuci waited for a long time before finally seeing Gu Jiuxing’s car. He walked over and saw Tang Ziyou getting off the car.

With eyes facing each other, Tang Ziyou avoided him, standing aside and waiting for Gu Jiuxing.

When Grandma Gu saw him coming, she said with joy, “Xiao You is back, he is still sweet. Knowing that I miss you, so he picked you back early.”

Gu Jiuci said helplessly, “I asked my brother to pick him up.”

“Then why don’t you pick him up yourself?” Grandma Gu looked at him, “I knew I would trouble your brother.”

I want to go, but will he open the door for me when I go? Gu Jiuci was so angry that he had nothing to say and simply closed his ears.

Tang Ziyou followed Grandma Gu upstairs and stayed in the house he used to live in.

Gu Jiuxing stopped Gu Jiuci, called him to his study, and told him what Tang Ziyou said in the car.

“I thought it was weird before. Xiao You likes you so much. He shouldn’t have been angry with you for so long and forgive you. I didn’t expect that he wouldn’t be able to pass this level of his own.”

“I know.” Gu Jiuci said, “I have already told him that this is not his fault. People will make mistakes. This is not a big deal, but he has been stuck here and can’t get out.”

“He should be really sad.” Gu Jiuxing said, “Because he likes someone, he has turned into something he doesn’t like and he hasn’t noticed it until he’s awakened by the person he likes and realized that he had become like this. It was too sad, he didn’t dare to believe and love anymore. It’s normal.”

“Then what should I do?” Gu Jiuci said with a headache, “How can I pull him out of this knot?”

“You can only rely on your own efforts.” Gu Jiuxing patted his shoulder, “Come on.”

Gu Jiuci sighed. He had known that he shouldn’t be so difficult at the time. It was better to confess his love early and be with Tang Ziyou early.

It was fine now and the knot was incomprehensible. How could he help Tang Ziyou untie the knot?

Gu Jiuci thought so, thinking about the Chinese New Year all the time.

The Gu’s parents finally came back now. Grandma Gu looked at her son and daughter-in-law and couldn’t stop smiling happily.

Mother Gu saw Tang Ziyou and smiled, “This is Xiaoyou, you’re so pretty. Come on, Auntie bought you a gift.”

Tang Ziyou took the gift from Mother Gu and said politely, “Thank you, Auntie.”

“You’re welcome. You will also be our child in the future. You don’t need to be so polite.”

Father Gu also smiled, “Yes, don’t be polite to us just because we don’t come back often. I don’t think you and Xiao Xing are so polite.”

Tang Ziyou smiled shyly, but Gu Jiuxing boasted, “Maybe I look more friendly, so Xiao You likes me better.”

Father Gu laughed loudly, “You are still friendly, the old antique people in the company hate you to death.”

“I’m obviously very friendly to them, too.” Gu Jiuxing said, “I didn’t even drive them away and let them take dividends. Isn’t that friendly?”

Father Gu laughed more heartily. Tang Ziyou listened to his laughter and felt the warmth of Gu family, his mood gradually got better.

Everyone had a lively meal together. Before going to bed, Mother Gu pressed a red envelope under his pillow.

Tang Ziyou wanted to refuse. Mother Gu took his hand and smiled, “You’re not married yet. You are all children. You have, Xiao Xing and Xiao Jiu also have, so you are welcome.”

Tang Ziyou looked at her and wanted to tell her that he and Gu Jiuci had broken off their engagement, but he didn’t know if Mother Gu at this time knew.

He had to accept it and said softly, “Thank you.”

“You are welcome.” Mother Gu looked at him, “I have said, you are also our child.”

She said a few words to Tang Ziyou before leaving his bedroom.

Tang Ziyou sat on the bed, turned around, and picked up the pillow. He looked at the red envelope.

He took it and pinched it, a thick pile.

—the same as in the previous life.

Tang Ziyou was suddenly moved. Whether it was in his previous life or in this life, the people in the Gu family had always treated him well, including Grandma Gu, Father Gu, Mother Gu, and Gu Jiuxing.

If it wasn’t that Gu Jiuci didn’t love him, then this was actually the feeling of home he had always dreamed of.

Parents who were busy but understanding children, mature and gentle brother, everything he wanted, in fact, could be realized here in Gu Jiuci.

It was a pity that Gu Jiuci didn’t love him.

Tang Ziyou put the red envelope back. He was just going to take a bath, but he heard a knock on the door.

When he walked out, Gu Jiuci really was outside the door.

“Happy New Year.” Gu Jiuci said.

“You too, Happy New Year.”

“I have a gift for you.”

As Gu Jiuci said, he bowed his head and untied the chain between his neck. He handed the necklace to Tang Ziyou, “Here it is.”

Tang Ziyou looked at the necklace in his hand. This was probably Gu Jiuci’s favourite jewellery. He had been wearing this dice necklace since their engagement.

He once wanted to buy a necklace like his, as a couple’s necklace, but he didn’t find the same one.

Now, Gu Jiuci actually gave him this necklace.

Tang Ziyou looked at the dice pendant in his hand. He suddenly thought of Wen Tingyun’s sentence he had read when he was reading poems—Dice jewel contented red bean, the lovesickness that was unaware. (Explain in T/N)

Gu Jiuci gave a necklace or his love?

No matter which one, Tang Ziyou felt that he wasn’t qualified to accept it.

“You should keep it for yourself.”

“I want to give it to you.” Gu Jiuci insisted.

Tang Ziyou shook his head, “It’s too late. I should sleep.”

He closed the door and refused Gu Jiuci.

Gu Jiuci looked at the lonely rejected necklace in his hand. At that moment, he suddenly remembered an old song: The most willing to forget the ancient poems, the most disdain is lovesickness. (Explain in T/N)

Tang Ziyou rejected his lovesickness, just like back then he dismissed Tang Ziyou’s love.

Between them, there weren’t only faults but also misses.

The author has something to say:

Dice jewel contented red bean, the lovesickness that was unaware—From Wen Tingyun’s poem 《To the New Tune of Yang Liu Zhi – Second Part》 (新添声柳枝词·其二).

The most willing to forget the ancient poems, the most disdain is lovesickness. This is the lyrics from Mao Amin’s 《Lovesickness》 (相思).