Chapter 186: Chapter 119 Yao Mingyue: Let's Start Over._4

But as both grew up, even childhood friends had boundaries that should not be crossed.Moreover, during the bloom of adolescence, some girls began to harbor crushes on Xu Musen.

This gave rise to fear in Yao Mingyue's heart; she was scared that one day Xu Musen might leave her.

Time twisted this fear into something distorted, leaving her unable to distinguish whether their relationship was friendship or a confusing love.

This step by step nurtured her mentally unstable character...

Xu Musen, looking into her tearful eyes, sighed and continued to speak, "Actually, I am also to blame. When I confessed to you before, I was egged on by others in a moment of impulse.

You really are outstanding. Ever since we were kids, there have been countless people who've confessed to you, especially when excellent guys came along.

I felt a lot of pressure too; I worried whether you would leave with someone else. Sёarch* The NôᴠelFirё.net website on Google to access chapters of novels early and in the highest quality.

Plus, with the impulsiveness of youth, I thought dating you would add to my prestige, and besides, you were rich, which made me shamefully think I wouldn't have to try too hard afterward."

Xu Musen shook his head, "So, we both cared too much about what others thought and never really considered what we liked about each other. We didn't get together because we truly liked each other, but to prevent others from taking what we liked."

Xu Musen laid bare both their weaknesses.

Yao Mingyue clenched the hem of Xu Musen's clothes, tears staining her cheeks, "What does it mean to like... All I know is, if it's not you, I don't want anyone else."

"Still, if we were together, could you really be happy? Could you really stop the insecure and erratic thoughts? Having just an empty shell of me, is that truly what you want?" he asked her again.

But this time, Yao Mingyue was stunned, her phoenix eyes almost bloodshot from entanglement.

"Ever since that day, after Uncle Yao's departure, Aunt Liu had to go out and struggle, you've always felt abandoned by the entire world.

You see me as your only pillar, but you're scared, scared that I'll leave you too.

Therefore, you've never truly opened up to me, or rather, you don't even trust yourself anymore; you're afraid you'll lose everything you cherish.

That's why you're desperate to control everything in your grasp."

Xu Musen looked at her, Yao Mingyue's hand covering her chest, right where her heart was.

She felt that this moment, the wounds deeply covered in her heart, had been revealed once again.

Memories of a past life surfaced, making Xu Musen's own heart complex.

"If we really got together, even got married, you would become increasingly insecure, and the final outcome would be that we both neglected the beauty we saw in each other at the start.

You wouldn't gain the security you wanted, and I wouldn't find the love I was after—we would both be losers in this relationship. We shouldn't let this tragedy happen again, while it's still possible to avoid a point of no return."

Xu Musen raised his hand and gently wiped the tear stains from Yao Mingyue's eyes, "You and I grew up together. No matter what happens in the future, I hope that you can lead a normal life, truly experience the beauty of life, and truly understand what it feels like to like someone."

The waves of the river lapped against the shore, accompanied by the evening breeze, calming the soul.

And yet, in the quiet night, one can always hear the truest voice from deep within.

Yao Mingyue stared at him blankly.

Indeed, it seemed they were both failures in love.

It was like a math problem.

The start wasn't wrong, and the answer was certain.

But there was a problem with the formula used in between.

Yao Mingyue extended her hand and grasped his, the one that had wiped away her tears.

Her eyes held a careful hope, "Xu Musen... does that mean, if I can find the right way to truly like you, we can still be together?"

Her voice was like that of a drowning person clutching at the last straw.

Xu Musen looked at her, his expression complex, "Why bother? There are better people than me in this world."

"Xu Musen!"

Yao Mingyue's voice was choked with sobs, but she shouted with all her might.

"You may not like me now, you can refuse my thoughts, but don't push me away or deny my determination to seriously be with you! My way of liking you might be wrong, but my feelings for you will never change!"

Yao Mingyue's every word seemed to be shouted into Xu Musen's heart.

Xu Musen looked into her eyes, a clarity and determination he had never seen before.

If only in the last life I could have...

Xu Musen fell silent for a long time, but sadly, in this world, there are no ifs.

He gently freed his hand, "As childhood friends, I would be happy about your change, but as for our relationship... let's just leave it at that for now."

In Xu Musen's mind, the image of An Nuannuan always surfaced, he couldn't forget the day when An Nuannuan, struggling painfully, clung to the staircase railing, determined to climb up and bring him mung bean soup.

That pure affection was like a beam of light that had intruded into his life.

Yao Mingyue looked at the complexity in his eyes, and she suddenly moved closer,

and locked eyes with Xu Musen, "Just like that? Xu Musen, tell me, do you really want to watch me be with other guys in the future?"

Her voice was earnest, and her phoenix eyes were filled with the reflection of Xu Musen.

Xu Musen was also startled for a moment.

The girl before him had been his childhood friend for nearly twenty years, his wife from a previous life for many years.

If he completely cut off all contact in this life, perhaps with time, Xu Musen would gradually forget her.

But what about now...

The fate of the two did not seem to have been easily severed.

If there really was a day when Yao Mingyue would appear in front of him with another man... a surge of irritation suddenly rose in Xu Musen's heart!

He didn't speak.

But Yao Mingyue, seeing all the fleeting emotions in the depths of his eyes, smiled happily with tears in her eyes, "Xu Musen, actually, you're just like me... you can't bear to let go of me, but rest assured, in this life, I will only truly like you alone, forever."

Xu Musen didn't speak, he finished the drink in his hand, and finally said, "Yao Mingyue, I don't want to be the person who deceives you, so I'm telling you now, right now my feelings for her are the strongest."

Yao Mingyue's eyes dimmed for a moment, but she also took a sip of the drink, choking until her face was painfully red, her tears still glimmering.

"But what does that have to do with my liking you? I, Yao Mingyue, haven't lost to anyone in my life. I just want to tell you, I still like you, and sooner or later, I will make you willingly come back to me."

Yao Mingyue upheld her pride, but it was also the most earnest promise she made in her life.

Xu Musen didn't say anything; he had said all that needed to be said, and the rest was beyond his control.

He stood up and picked up all the bottles on the ground, "Let's go, I'll take you home."

Xu Musen walked a few steps and threw the bottles into the trash can.

"Xu Musen!"

Behind him was Yao Mingyue's cry.

Xu Musen turned his head, his pupils contracting!

At this moment, Yao Mingyue, with a hint of drunkenness, had flushed cheeks and teary eyes, yet she unsteadily climbed up the handrail of the riverside stairs.

Behind her was the river.

"Yao Mingyue, what are you doing!"

Xu Musen's drunkenness instantly cleared.

But Yao Mingyue just laughed, the evening breeze blowing her hair, her eyes reddening but with a hint of a smile, her phoenix eyes reflecting the riverside's brilliance.

"Xu Musen, tell me, if she and I both fell into the river, whom would you save first?"

"You're crazy! Get down from there!"

Xu Musen, in his haste, ran toward her, realizing he just couldn't trust this mad girl.

Yet, seeing his frantic look, Yao Mingyue laughed even more joyously, her step light.

"I'm not forcing you to choose me, but now I have my answer... I just want to tell you about my determination to like you."

Yao Mingyue saw him approaching, her voice soft yet firm.

"Let's start over."

With that, she leaned back slightly...