Side Story Chapter 124 - Engagement Ceremony (2)
“U-Uhmm...”
Oh Kang-Woo’s chest felt like there was a giant boulder on it. Cold sweats flowed down his back.
“Come on~ now, Kang-Woo!”
Han Seol-Ah’s beautiful face and shining eyes couldn’t be any more terrifying than this moment. Kang-Woo frantically turned the gears in his brain to find a way to survive this situation.
“Darling. What use does a flimsy piece of paper have between us?” Kang-Woo looked at Seol-Ah intimately and embraced her by the waist. “Our love— this brimming and fluttering emotion can’t be contained by a mere piece of paper!!!”
His love for Seol-Ah couldn’t be expressed by words on paper, proven by the fact that he didn’t have the slightest idea what twenty rounds per day— sixty if it included all three of his wives— could possibly mean.
“Can words on a piece of paper prove our love for each other? Can it represent the sacred act of marriage? NO!!! I do not think so! True love cannot be expressed by a piece of p—”
“Yap.”
“GYEEEEEEEEEEEHHH!!!”
Seol-Ah grabbed Kang-Woo’s thumb which was covered in the red stamp ink and brought it to the contract paper. Kang-Woo twisted and turned as he screamed but he failed to get his thumb away from Seol-Ah’s grasp. His thumbprint successfully made contact with the contract.
“D-Darling...”
Kang-Woo stared at Seol-Ah wide-eyed like Caesar stabbed by Brutus.
“Fufu. With this, you have to fulfill the conditions of the contract every day, Kang-Woo!” shouted Seol-Ah with shining eyes.
“NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!”
Kang-Woo collapsed, unable to accept the reality that befell him.
“Hohoho.”
“You guys sure love to play around.”
Lilith simply giggled at the sight and Yeon-Joo sighed deeply as she shook her head.
“Come on, that was a pretty funny skit,” Kang-Woo stood up as he chuckled.
The premarital contract only had power in court; it couldn’t force Kang-Woo to do anything. Only pledges he made with his Deific Essence could do such a thing. The contract was surely a joke Seol-Ah came up with to make the ceremony more interesting.
“Pardon...?” Seol-Ah asked.
“Huh?”
“Kang-Woo... did you think this was a joke?”
Seol-Ah stepped backward with trembling eyes. She lowered her head as if she were deeply shocked and covered her face with her hands.
“Hurgh!! I can’t believe you, Kang-Woo!!! Was our marriage just a joke to you?!”
“Huh? Huuuh?”
‘It wasn’t a joke?’
“No, Darling. You have it all wrong.”
“What do I have wrong?!”
“My love for you is true and always will be.”
“Really...?” Seol-Ah asked with her head still lowered and continued, “Then—”
Kang-Woo thought he saw the corners of Seol-Ah’s mouth rising for some reason.
“Swear on your Deific Essence that you’ll carry out the conditions of this contract.”
“Pardon?”
‘Could you repeat that?’
“Swear on your Deific Essence right now... for everyone to hear.”
“...”
Kang-Woo shook. His expression turned deathly pale. A mere contract held no power over him but he couldn’t defy a pledge made with his Deific Essence.
‘At this rate...’
Gulp.
Kang-Woo carefully read over the contract once again. If he were to carry out the conditions of this contract every day...
“It’ll burst.”
He didn’t know what would burst but he was sure something would.
“Kang-Woo? Please swear it now.”
“Oh, ummm...”
Kang-Woo stared blankly into space.
“Pfft!”
Laughter leaked from Seol-Ah’s covered face.
“Darling?”
“Hahahaha! It was just a joke, Kang-Woo!” She giggled and lightly smacked Kang-Woo’s shoulder. “There’s no way I would demand something so unreasonable from you.”
Seol-Ah embraced Kang-Woo with a smile as if she were never sad. Kang-Woo’s expression crumpled and he tickled Seol-Ah’s sides.
“Kyahaha! That tickles!”
“Where did you learn to do something so naughty?”
“Fufu. From you, Kang-Woo.”
“Wha—”
‘That leaves me with no valid arguments.’
Slam!
“Gahahaha!! If you’re referring to an oath of marriage, I have also succeeded! Three times, no less, unlike this brat!!”
“Kurgh!”
“TH-THREE TIIIIIIIIIMES?!!”
‘Three times is enough for even Liu Bei to swear undying fealty to Zhuge Liang!’
“BALROG, YOU SON OF A BITCH!!! I KNEW I COULD COUNT ON YOU!!! I NEVER HAD A DOUBT!!!”
Kang-Woo, who had called Balrog a motherfucker moments ago, shed passionate tears and raised his right arm.
“Gahaha!!! You just have to do exactly as I say, my king!!!”
Balrog, the proposal expert, nodded and high-fived Kang-Woo.
“ALRIGHT!!! TELL ME WHAT TO DO, BALROG!!!”
“FIRST, YOU HAVE TO APPROACH THE WOMAN WHOM YOU PLAN TO MAKE YOUR OATH OF MARRIAGE TO WITHOUT HESITATION!!! THE DRIVE IS IMPORTANT!!!”
“YEAH!!! OKAY!!! DRIVE IS IMPORTANT FOR SURE!!!”
“NEXT, YOU RIP THEIR CLOTHES OFF!!!”
“RIP WHAT OFF?!!”
“THEIR CLOTHES!!! LIKE A VICIOUS BEAST!!!”
“ARE YOU SURE?!!”
“THEN YOU COMMAND THE WOMAN TO BE YOURS FOREVER!!!”
“I DON’T THINK THIS IS IT!!!”
“NONE OF THE WOMEN I’VE DONE THIS TO HAVE REFUSED MY ADVANCES!!! HOWEVER, ON THE OFF CHANCE THAT THEY STILL REFUSE, WHAT YOU HAVE TO DO IS USE FORCE TO—”
“YOU MOTHERFUCKEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEER!!!”
“KUUUUUUUUUURGH!!!”
BASH—!!!
Kang-Woo smashed his foot into Balrog’s groin. Balrog, the self-proclaimed proposal expert, fell to his knees as he screamed.
“THAT’S NOT A PROPOSAAAAAAAAAAAAAL!!!”
Kang-Woo beat Balrog senseless as he pulled on his hair. He was an idiot for trusting the man with negative brain cells.
“Huff, huff, huff!” Kang-Woo panted heavily and turned around to look at Si-Hun, shaking his head haughtily as if knowing this would happen.
“As I thought, that ignorant muscle pig wouldn’t know how to propose to a woman.” Si-Hun placed his hand on the panting Kang-Woo’s shoulder. “Trust me, hyung-nim.”
“S-Si-Hun?”
“As long as you have this proposal method that I found on the treasury of endless knowledge that is the Internet, you can also succeed in your proposal like I did with Layla.”
“I love you, my little bro!!! You’re the best!!!”
Kang-Woo hugged Si-Hun tightly.
Si-Hun smiled and continued, “First, gently walk toward your lover.”
***
“Darling.”
Kang-Woo gently walked toward Seol-Ah. He softly grabbed her hand and got down on one knee.
“Kang-Woo...”
Seol-Ah’s eyes welled up with tears.
Kang-Woo kissed the back of her hand and said the line that Si-Hun passed down to him.
“Your mother is... a criminal.”
“Pardon? What are you talking about all of a...”
“Because—” His voice and gaze were as intimate and loving as possible. He answered, “She stole the angel that is you from heaven.”
He smiled brightly and winked.
“...”
“...”
“...”
“...”
Deathly silence fell.
‘D-Did it work? Did I do it?!’
Kang-Woo looked up as his heart pounded like crazy.
“Huh...?”
The women’s faces were weird. They were filled with contempt and disgust as if they had stepped on vomit that a drunkard made in the middle of the road on their way home.
‘What’s going on? Why are they making that kind of face...? Si-Hun said it had a 100% chance of success!!! Why are my wives making those faces?!!’
Riiing!
The System bell chime echoed in his ears.
[Sir Guardian Deity.] A blue message window appeared in front of him. [Get out.]
‘Why???’
1. Marriage proposal in Korean is a phonetic version of the English word “propose.” ☜