499 The Confiding
Selma Payne’s POV:
Emma refused to return to her previous position. She looked at me apologetically but firmly. “That’s not my place, Selma. I can’t feel freedom and would suffer there. I’ve tried my best, but I’ve only barely passed. To assist you, just passing is not enough. There will be someone more suitable to take my place. I can’t be selfish and not let go.”
“No, that’s now how it’s like.” I shook my head, hoping to make her stay. “No one can do this well from the beginning. Even I have made countless childish mistakes. Don’t belittle yourself, Emma. You’re improving, and we’ve all seen it. You’ve been doing very well by my father’s side, right?”
Emma smiled gently. “But you and I both know that there’s a limit to this kind of progress. My upper limit is there. Mediocre is the best evaluation for me. Besides, although you and I don’t say anything, we both know: My family name has determined that I can’t go far.
“I know you have never blamed me, Selma, but this does not mean that others will not be self-righteous and try to figure out your feelings. Can you forgive me? Can anyone else tolerate a descendant of the Evaria Family? Would the people want to see a murderer’s offspring stand by the side of the King and the future Queen of the Lycan kingdom?”
I looked at her sorrowfully, this intelligent, gentle, and strong woman. She stepped onto a shooting star and, after a brief moment of light and heat in the night, fell into the deep sea, never to return to the clear sky.
It wasn’t until Emma wiped the tears from the corners of my eyes that I realized I was crying unconsciously.
“It’s a good thing for me,” Emma said. “There will be fewer eyes staring at me, and no one will use those boring tricks to get rid of me. I can pursue things I couldn’t get in the first half of my life, such as studying painting at an art university, becoming an artist, and even being invited back to teach at school. When I think of this, I feel extremely excited and proud. This is the life I want, Selma.”
“Just this?” I asked, choking with sobs.
“Yes, that’s all. Be it the title of nobility or wealth, I’ve experienced enough glory and wealth in the first half of my life. I’ve had enough of the pain of being controlled by these things. Now, I’m going to start my own life.”
“As you wish, my dear.” I nodded after a long silence.
I didn’t harp on this issue; instead, I started talking about Rhode.
Rhode rejected the proposal to cancel the engagement. I said, “Although I didn’t say anything as you said, he still guessed that this was related to your family. He doesn’t want to give up on you for no reason. He wants to see you and ask you what you really want.”
Emma was a little flustered. “What’s there to see... Now that things have come to this, there’s no way we can be together. Selma, your brother cannot marry the descendant of a sinful officer. You know what kind of storm this will cause among the people. And I can’t marry your brother. This is a dangerous signal. My family will have unrealistic hope again, bringing countless troubles we don’t want to see.”
“It’s just a possibility. I’m only asking you, do you still love Rhode? If you didn’t have all the concerns you mentioned, would you still be willing to marry Rhode?”
Emma fell silent. She rubbed her skirt uneasily, frowning, and her unfocused eyes seemed unable to focus.
“... Even if I’m still in love with Rhode, I can’t-”
“Nothing is impossible, my dear. I only want one word from you. Do you love him or not?” I said firmly, “Marriage is very important but also very simple. It’s only related to the bride and groom. Other factors are not important at all. There’s always a way to solve it.”
Tears rolled in Emma’s eyes, but she bit her lip and tried not to cry.
“Yes, I still love Rhode. I still love him. There’s not a day that I don’t miss him.”
Tears finally fell from Emma’s eyes, and behind her nonchalant appearance was a deep pain. How could a girl who yearned for freedom and romance give up her love so easily? She was suppressing her desire, afraid that such feelings would once again bring misfortune to the people around her.
However, I knew that this wasn’t her fault. She was a pitiful person who had been used and implicated. She had already suffered enough coldness in her life. If she also lost her love, would she still be able to live a sunny and romantic life with her ice-cold heart?
I should do something. As a friend and monarch, I couldn’t just watch Emma regret it for the rest of her life.
“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you beforehand, but...”
I walked to the door and gently turned the doorknob.
“Since you can’t let go, why don’t you meet Rhode and tell him your thoughts?”
The door was gently opened, and Rhode was standing outside with tears streaming down his face.