Chapter 12 - Uncertain steps

Grant stood by the door he peered at Demos for confirmation. I don't know what transpired from their mute conversation. They slightly shook their heads at each other when they reached some sort of agreement. I could barely keep my eyes open. I struggled to put one foot in front of the other and threw myself back first on the bed without taking off the bed cover.

"Hey, careful with the glasses," warned Demos as he followed me.

"I'm too tired," I mumbled. He towered over me and pulled them off. I rolled on my side making a mess with my hair in the process.

"Liliane?" they called. I popped one eye open to gaze at them. Why were they still standing so far away from the bed? With the thick fog that engulfed my tired mind, I've completely forgotten Demos was too heavy for the bed. What the hell!

"Just how much do you weight exactly?" I laughed as he took a moment to answer.

"One hundred and fifty-eight kilos. If you add Grant's ninety-eights and yours, the structure of that bed won't support us," I just nodded and closed my eyes most of his explanation rolled over my already sleeping brain like water off a plastic bag.

"Sure, then just keep me company; I don't want to be alone tonight," I murmured as I pulled my pillow under my head. The bed creaked and covers landed on me. I snuggled against the warmth, just before I drifted to sleep… I heard:

"Good night Liliane"

***

I woke up with a jolt. My breathing rapid and my throat dry. The room was still dark; almost pitch black only for the red glow from the neon light against the curtains visible. One arm wrapped itself around my waist I turned to the owner left in the shadows. I pushed myself up on one arm. A black silhouette cut against the red glow sat on the floor by the bed. I swallowed, trying to calm my racing heart. The silhouetted stirred.

"Did you have a bad dream?" it said. I blinked at it, still affected by the horrible shadows chasing me in my dream. I flinched when fingers tips brushed against my cheek.

"Lights!" I shouted with a broken voice. The over-head circular lamp gradually illuminated the room, pushing the shadows in the far corners. Sitting by the bed was a puzzled Demos with his arm extended towards me. He tilted his head and retrieved his hand.

"Sorry, for scaring you," his voice was low with a mixture of anguish and guilt. I shook my head, making loose locks fall on my forehead. I lowered my eyes to the arm on my lap. Grant lay beside me on the covers. I brushed his hand away it fall limply by his side. He was cold… like dead cold. He didn't move or breathe. I looked up at Demos in alarm.

"His battery went out in the middle of the night. Still, he refused to let go of you," I brushed Grant's curls from his sleeping face. He looked so peaceful.

"Won't it damage him if he stays like that too long?" I met his dark copper eyes. They appeared to tell me things I didn't want to understand. Maybe I was not ready to hear. He got to his feet, breaking the connection. He went around the bed and pulled Grant into his arms. He seemed so fragile and small resting against Demos' chest.

"I better put him back to his pod," I kicked the covers and hurried to get the door for them. Demos paused when he reached my level. My head sprung up to meet his melancholic eyes.

"Will you be ok on your own?" he said reluctantly. My hand shook at the thought of going back to that horror-filled dream with creatures tearing my very soul to shreds. My throat tightened.

"Then, wait for me," he entered the dark living room and dropped Grant in his pod. He secured him inside with straps. I stood by the door, gripping the knob until my hand hurts. What was I really expecting from them? Was it a cure for the void within? It was selfish from my part to take and never be able to give anything in return. I didn't think I would ever be normal again… even less loving them back. A shiver ran down my spine. The darkness raced back at me.

"Do you want some water?" called Demos from the kitchen. I looked up with relief and nodded. He filled a tall glass, which he handed me. I drunk it in one sip.

"Thirsty?" he crooked one eyebrow at me. I simply nodded and gave back the glass.

"Get to bed, I'll be right there," I took a rapid detour to the bathroom then slipped under the blanket. Demos closed the door silently behind him when he came back. He sat next to the bed at the same spot he previously occupied. I rolled on my side to gaze at the back of his closely shaved hair.

"Lights dim," the lamps gently faded. I reached out and caressed his neck with the back of my hand, then went up his hair. He relaxed against my hand with a low m.o.a.n. I pulled my hand instantly a little embarrassed.

"I-I don't think I can do that," I turned away from him pulling my blanket up to my chin.

"Liliane?"

"It's too awkward, Ok!" my voice muffled by the blanket.

"Do you want me to go?" his clothes rustled as he got up.

"I had trouble at work today. That's why I came back early," the room was silent. I peeked over my shoulder to check if he was still here. He stood solidly against the red curtain.

"Why didn't you say anything?" I pushed the covers away.

"I was scared and angry. I didn't know how to deal with it," I said. My voice rose to a high pitch that threatened to break.

"Is it my fault? Is it that man at the station?" his hands squeezed into fists in the gloom.

"It-it's not your fault. He's got a giant ego and can't take a no for a NO!" I shook my head, trying to convince myself it was nothing major.

"What are you going to do now?"

"I'll wait and see… for now," I exhaled. "Let's hope I don't need to find another job. Then we'll really be in big trouble. With all the bills coming by the end of the month. I cross my fingers I don't get fired," Demos stood silently I could only make out his silhouette. I was able to speak out my concern. I felt relief washed over me, keeping all this to myself was killing me.

"I'm sorry for earlier," I said and turned my focus back to him. "I really wasn't in the mood. I'm sorry if I've said hurtful words," he didn't answer and that made me anxious. So, I went on.

"It's just that whenever I'm near you… I feel strange. However, I don't want to hurt Grant. So in this stupid threesome thing, we'll all get hurt in a way," not seeing his face made it extremely difficult to keep it together.

"Lights!"

Demos glared at me with his hands in his pockets. The sight hit me like a Transfer.

"The three laws prevent me from hurting you; my alpha program urges me to. Right now I'm in a big dilemma," he spoke through gritted teeth. A shiver ran down my spine. What was he talking about?

"What-?" he took a step towards the bed. Scary! I struggled not to run.

"Why so much angst?" his question caught me off guard. How did it turn into a therapy session?

"I-I…" I couldn't find anything to retort.

"Why don't you trust anyone? Was it your parents? A lover? A bully when you were a kid? Tell me, I want to know everything about you!" his knee bumped into the bed. "Why won't you let me in? Is it because I'm artificial? I'm here because you wanted me… you ordered me," he pointed a menacing finger at me but his face told another story. There was only pain over his features.

"I'm sorry…" I murmured.

"What did you really want? You ordered a mate! So why are you like… I can't do that… it's weird! Liliane, we are already here! DEAL WITH IT!" with that he slammed the door behind him and he was gone.