It was evening already by the time I was done with all my classes. Normally, the majority of students went straight to the café or hung out with their friends. But I—Anya, had a schedule that was a little different from the rest.
Once I was done with my classes, the first thing I did was to come back to my room and settle all the notes I'd taken during the classes accordingly and arrange them in a manner so that I don't have to go through much trouble when I want to revise and skim them later on.
After that part was done, I hop out of my school uniform and change into casual, more comfortable clothes. This part took about five to ten minutes, but it depends. Sometimes I can find the clothes fitting to my mood, but sometimes I don't, and when that happens the whole process can take up to about half an hour.
It might seem long, but was still shorter than the time other girls took to prepare themselves, even when they weren't going out for a special occasion. I was never the fashion-type girl. As I mentioned before, I wore what looked good and fitting according to the mood I had at the time.
Though, every then and now, this was the very reason it took me hours to find an item of clothing I was proud of. I mean, what I wear depends on my mood, so it's kind of obvious that I'll get into trouble doing that if I'm in a sour mood.
This was exactly the case today, or for the past few days, for the last week, it leans on from when you start to count. If we go to the very start, then it might be a good number of days—from the day I was introduced to the fact that Zero might be dead and gone.
From there, it was a downward spiral. Let's skip over the days I went coiled up on my bed inside my room, you won't get much out of there since I neither bathe nor changed my clothes. It isn't a suitable thing for a girl to do, but my mindset being what it was, I would say that I was lucky enough to come out of it in one piece.
So since we are jumping over all those days, let's come to the recent events. Three days before today, Zero arrived at the academy. He came back…alive, like a human should be.
I was led to him by Ellyn and wasn't expecting to see something like this. And then it happened, when I saw him. Sitting there, talking to Mr. Jekar. He looked at me, and smiled…
If before then anyone would have told me that a single glimpse of a person can shake your whole world and snap you out of the darkness you thought you would live in for the rest of your life, I obviously wouldn't have believed them like any sane person.
But that time when I experienced it firsthand, I had no option but to believe it. That day I also came to know that all the things in the world don't have to make sense for them to be there. Some things just happen, without a reason, without an explanation, and without much logic.
From that day onward I was a little shaken from the inside, and very much from the outside. I mean that in a quite literal sense.
If Ellyn hadn't been so nice to force me into a bath, apply the usual cosmetics on my face, and wrapped me into some decent clothing, I am sure I would have looked like a witch out of those plays—thanks to all the dark circles I had gained under my eyes.
It took me a good couple of days to come to terms with and realize the fact that Zero was back now, safe and sound. And I don't mean this in any metaphorical way.
When I first saw him, I couldn't believe it. Even after sitting there with him during the time he was knocked out, I had all the time in the world to sit there and see him. See him to verify that he is real. I did that, but it was of no use.
Even after he woke up, talked to me, and explained vaguely about what had happened, I was quite unstable. Maybe that was the reason which caused me to outright ask him if he was there or not. Looking back at it now, I'm pretty embarrassed and not proud by any means. It must have sounded super weird.
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All of this was probably because somewhere deep in my heart, I was blaming myself. For all the things that happened with Zero, all the injuries he gained, there's no denying the fact that he almost died even if he'd come out of it safely.
I blamed no one but myself for it. It was that letter…which I think forced me into blaming myself. The words were written clearly on it—that Zero would die if I didn't get into a relationship with a certain person, who later turned out to be Leon.
It weighed on me for a good while, despite all the talking Zero did and told me not to worry about it. How could I not? I mean, what was written in the letter came true in the end. How could I not believe that and blame myself that I should've just done what it said? If so, then everything would have been fine. Probably.
But when he came back and told me again to not take all the blame. I gave it some thought, much thought, quite a good amount of thought. I can't say I got over it in an instant. I will also confess that I thought about just following the letter so nothing else goes wrong.
However, I was stopped, by myself. I was stopped by a part of my brain and heart that said what would be the meaning of all the things that happened, all the injuries and wounds Zero faced if I just did what the letter told me to despite all the trouble Zero went through.
I was just thinking hypothetically, of course. I had no way of knowing whether the incident was caused by the sender of that letter or not. But even hypothetically, if the sender somehow was related to it all and the one working from the shadows.
I decided to follow Zero's advice like I'd been doing. I mean, he faced all the trouble and almost died. Even he was strong in his decision and told me not to worry about him. He didn't go back to his words and told me to continue the relationship with Leon. So if nothing else, I can't let that will of his go waste.
I collected my thoughts, it took time but was worthwhile in the end. Then about the same when Zero recovered from his wounds, I also gained my peace of mind and was back in a state where I could be described as a normal and sane human being.
My mood was not the best, not even today. Which could be seen through the clothes I was wearing today. Blue leggings and a gray cardigan. I thought about taking a cloak too, but then dismissed the thought as it would've been a lot of trouble handling it.
Rather than that, I just wrapped a scarf around my neck and headed out from the dorms.
The weather was good. It was one of those perfect autumn evenings, so common in stories but rare in reality. The sky was a tinge of orange and golden, matching the color of the leaves on the trees. The gentle cold breeze passed by from time to time, passing the leaves that had fallen on the ground, up in a swirl.
I walked down a concrete path that led to the cafeteria. I didn't have a solid breakfast, and it was time I was starting to get hungry. As I got closer to the building, the crowd of people around me increased as well.
Some students came to take a walk for refreshment, those were hanging out with their friends, some in groups, and some alone. It might come as a little surprising considering that it's only been a month and a half since the start of our term at the academy, but many students had started dating already.
Resulting in the couples who were enjoying the evening at the café or sitting, holding each other's hand on the benches scattered around in the garden surrounding the cafeteria.
Pushing the glass door backward, I entered the building. Taking a look I saw that most of the seats were already occupied, but after searching and scanning the area for a while I found a vacant one.
Though I had to order something first and there weren't any waiters at the café—you had to take your food—so I went and demanded a cup of tea along with some regular evening snacks.
Several minutes later, my order arrived, I picked up the tray and went toward the seat I'd picked a moment ago. There were originally two seats on the table I'd chosen and when I saw it back then, both of them were empty.
However, as of now, the other one was occupied by a boy who had jet-black hair and a pair of gleaming, red eyes. As he saw me approaching a smile painted over his face, and from what I could tell it wasn't a forced but genuine one.
"Fancy seeing you here…alone, that is," I said as I placed my tray on the table and pulled the chair opposite to him. There was no way I was going to give up on my seat.
"Well, I admit it was starting to get a little gleamy. But now I have you to accompany me, so it's all well and good I guess," Leon replied.