CH 2

Chapter 2: Extramarital Affairs

Qin Shiwu gulped, stupidly sitting on the ground, like a Buddha-seeking girl*, both hands cupped in front of his chest, staring obsessively at Qin Chu, as if to burn a hole into Qin Chu’s face.

(* 求佛少女: not sure how to translate this but maybe it refers to like a praying on knees position…?)

Hu Si warned: “Look at your father ah!”

Qin Shiwu agreed in his heart: you’re right.

At that moment, the class bell rang knowingly, and Qin Chu and Hu Si let the two of them go.

A layer of cold sweat formed on Guapitou’s back and he said, “I thought I was going to be beaten by Qin Chu. I was scared to death.”

Qin Shiwu gradually returned to his senses and slowly stood up from the ground.

Guapitou said, “Fortunately, this class is physical education, so let’s just walk down the road to class.”

Who would have thought, Qin Shiwu did not pay attention to him, and went straight to the basketball court.

Guapitou asked, “Qin Shiwu, where are you going?”

He took two steps after him but found that Qin Shiwu moved as fast and skillfully as a dog, finding in a corner a blind spot of the surveillance at the basketball court.

——This place was a shortcut for most students to climb over the wall.

Guapitou realized what he was going to do and said, “you’re crazy! There’s still evening self-study after PE class. It’s just one class and you’re still climbing over the wall?”

At the same time, he thought to himself: is Qin Shiwu’s brain really damaged?

In his impression, Qin Shiwu was always submissive, stuttered and couldn’t lift his head. He was always obedient to everyone, and although his grades were not very good, he carefully paid the most attention in class. The most troublesome copybook homework in the class was also handed over by everyone to Qin Shiwu to do.

And he was never late or left early. Even if he was beaten so hard that he couldn’t stand up, he would crawl to the class.

So… Over the wall?

Is this something that Qin Shiwu could do?!

Guapitou’s palm sweated nervously, and he looked around quickly.

“Qin Shiwu, tell me properly. What made you go down this road of no return?!

This place is a restricted area for monitoring, so the school will arrange people from the student union to patrol here three times a day. If Qin Shiwu goes over the wall and he is caught on the side, they will have to record the name of the class.

The Discipline Inspection Department of the student union is composed of a group of male students who are the most troublesome bullies in the school. The school uses the means of controlling violence with violence. These gangsters aren’t good at studying, but they are very diligent in catching people.

However, there is also a drawback.

The discipline inspection department bullies the weak and fears the strong. When they encounter school bosses like Qin Chu, they will ignore it and even use the “official position” to get close.

But in the face of Guapitou and Qin Shiwu, small, invisible and with extremely low status at school, it is natural to be fair, strict and severely punish them.

Guapitou said, “what’s gotten into you? This wall is one meter eight. If you reach its middle, you will flip, flip, flip-“

Qin Shiwu’s action of climbing over the wall was as smooth as clouds and flowing water. As soon as he supported himself and jumped, he landed outside the wall in the blink of an eye.

Guapitou pulled at the railing, shocked.

“Qin Shiwu!! Bring me back a bowl of lean meatballs!”

Seeing Qin Shiwu go out, he hurriedly switched sides and immediately asked the other party to bring him a takeout.

Qin Shiwu had so many thoughts in his mind that he didn’t bother to deal with him at all.

After he left school, he directly planned to skip the evening self-study and go home to calm down.

At the same time, memories that didn’t belong to him gradually emerged in his mind, in bits and pieces, very fragmented. They seemed to be the memories of the previous “Qin Shiwu”.

That “Qin Shiwu’s” family was well off. His parents were divorced. His mother was a strong career woman. She traveled between countries all year round and could return home twice a year. Usually, his expenses were paid on a top business bank* card, five thousand yuan a month. In this era where you can buy pudding with 50 cents, five thousand yuan a month is a huge sum of money for high school students.

(* 工商.)

No wonder.

Qin Shiwu thought as he walked.

This person is rich and cowardly. He is the type that gangsters in school love to bully.

A typical rich stupid person.

After walking for a long time, Qin Shiwu stood outside a window on the side of the road and looked at himself reflected by the window glass.

Less than 1.7 meters, loose and oversized school uniform on his body, and black-rimmed glasses pressed on the bridge of his nose. No matter how you look at them, they still look outdated, like they belonged to more than a decade ago, almost all-round without any corners. Fuck his aesthetics.

Qin Shiwu shuddered in disgust and immediately entered a hair salon called Dream Lisa*.

(* 梦幻丽莎: mènghuàn lì shā)

The owner of the hair salon called A Zhen. As soon as Qin Shiwu entered, he saw hair all over the ground and began to dislike it, unwilling to stay.

In the barber shop, a cycle of rock music is playing. Hairdressers with various thick bangs and non-mainstream* styles, which were popular more than a decade ago, were slumped on the sofa and played their mobile phones. When they saw someone come in, they didn’t say hello.

(*非主流: this expression is apparently used to describe something that’s unconventional/not well accepted by people/non-predominant in society. Kind of like teenagers who want to stand out and dress and style themselves in a way that’s outside of the norm.)

A Zhen asked, “Haircut or hair wash?”

Qin Shiwu sat carelessly on the chair: “I want to iron and perm my hair*!”

(* the expression used here is 我要烫个头发 but I’m not exactly sure how to translate it? Anyways what Qin Shiwu wants to do is iron his hair and make it wavy like ur average male kpop idol hairstyle)

A Zhen’s shop often receives students of Qin Shiwu’s age, basically requesting to perm their hair as much as possible. After all, for contemporary high school students the thicker the bangs, the thicker the status and the flashier hair, the heavier the weight of their words.

“Do you think these are okay?”

A Zhen pointed to the book, and Qin Shiwu saw various types of non-mainstream afro hairstyles pass through his eyes.

The water in Qin Shiwu’s mouth sprayed onto the mirror.

Unfashionable, too unfashionable, incomparably and uniquely unfashionable.

Qin Shiwu wiped his mouth and pulled out his mobile phone from his pocket. He hesitated for a moment, after all, the Iphone 4 has just come out in this era and having a 4S can be used as a foundation to show off capital.

This fruit machine in Qin Shiwu’s hands, he didn’t know for how many generations it had developed to XXXLLL. The anniversary of Steve Jobs’ death has begun. Could people who had already met him sixteen years ago still doubt his (Qin Shiwu’s) origins?

Although sixteen years ago nobody had ever seen the fruit machine of the XXXLLLL generation, everyone had read time-traveling novels. Therefore, if Qin Shiwu is exposed, the end that awaits him will be the underground secret laboratory of the Institute of Chinese Academy of Sciences, and he will have to live surrounded by machines for the rest of his life.

Moreover, this mobile phone is also the only valid evidence that he is really a time-traveler. He tried it just now, and he couldn’t make calls and surf the Internet. His mobile phone couldn’t connect to the 3G network of this era, let alone try to call his parents across time and space.

There are only screenshots of the game he saved on his phone, as well as pitiful photos with his parents.

Qin Shiwu thought for a while, but still didn’t take out his mobile phone, and said, “Just give me a haircut of the same style as Lu Tong!”

This country bumpkin must know Lu Tong.

Qin Shiwu naturally thought so in his mind.

Lu Tong, the super star, just walked the red carpet in Cannes this year, picked up a literary film by a famous international director, and became an international movie star. From his debut to the present, he has won film emperor three times, and all kinds of works have bombarded the audience’s line of sight in turn on the big screen. Braindead fans could circle the Pacific Ocean twice.

Call him a big-name star, A lister movie star or television superstar, no one dares to refute.

This Lu Tong, who is very popular in the entertainment industry, is also the father of Qin Shiwu, the one who gave birth to him.

However, sixteen years later, he did not disclose marriage information to the public, nor did he disclose his secondary gender to the public. For the sake of his career, it was certainly impossible to disclose the existence of Qin Shiwu.

Therefore, although Qin Shiwu had both parents, he had been a social orphan at school for 12 years– he had never seen his parents come to a parent-teacher meeting.

Before transmigrating, it was also because Qin Shiwu lawlessly broke someone else’s arm in school that the teaching director of No.1 Provincial High School declared that if his parents didn’t come to get him, he would expel Qin Shiwu.

The anger that Qin Shiwu had been holding for twelve years was all spilled on Lu Tong and Qin Chu.

When Lu Tong came, he was surrounded by paparazzi all the way.

This phone call from the school directly sent Lu Tong to the hot search. What hidden marriage and children, what Omega film emperor and what financial backer vice president Qin of Central Control Ocean Group

In short, the day before Qin Shiwu’s transmigration, the whole of Weibo turned upside down, occupying the headlines of major search engines. The server was still paralyzed and hadn’t been fixed. There were 20 hot searches on Sina Weibo, and he contracted all the top 15 “explosions*”.

(* TN: apparently 爆 in this context is a Weibo thing that denotes that a certain topic has reached unprecedented peaks of attention… here’s more info about it but it’s in Chinese.)

When Qin Shiwu thought of this, he felt a sense of vengeful pleasure for his great achievements.

Triumphantly: You guys just clean up Grandpa’s mess! Hahaha!

He was so happy when he thought of his gentle and watertight* “mother” Lu Tong who wore a fake smile mask being so angry that he beat him with a coat hanger!

(* 滴水不漏: lit. not one drop of water can leak out; idiom that describes very meticulous, thorough, and impeccable speaking and handling.)

Let’s see how you explain to the media!

Spare my life, the film emperor is an omega, isn’t that hot* enough?

(* TN: as in, the hot search.)

In addition to the male and female genders, today’s society is also divided into three secondary genders: alpha, beta and omega, usually differentiating at the age of 15 or 16, and the differentiation will be completed later at the age of 17 or 18.

The proportions of Alphas in society account for 30%, beta accounts for 60%, Omega accounts for 10%, and even fewer male Omegas, so they are particularly precious.

Lu Tong is the rare and precious male Omega, but he made his debut long ago, the outside world acquiesced that he is beta, and it has even been rumored that he is an alpha. He has never heard of him having any love scandals, and he has many girlfriend fans crawling all over the floor.

Qin Shiwu had gotten his mother into such a mess… Apart from the other mess, Lu Tong’s career must have changed dramatically.

He felt no remorse.

Qin Shiwu is a little bastard. His parents have ignored him for more than ten years. He has made a mess for his parents and felt no burden in his heart.

It’s just… he didn’t know if he died sixteen years later after time-traveling?

Qin Shiwu pulled at the corners of his mouth.

If he dies, would Lu Tong shed a tear for him?

Thinking of this, Qin Shiwu’s chest was a little stuffy.

He opened his eyes and saw that A Zhen hadn’t started yet. He said impatiently, “why don’t you start ironing? Do you want me to teach you, wash your hair first to understand?”

A Zhen asked in confusion, “excuse me, who is Lu Tong?”

Qin Shiwu was stunned.

A moment later, he slapped his thigh.

He spat out a fragrant “fuck!”.

Yes! It was sixteen years ago. He had time-traveled!

Lu Tong – Lu Tong hadn’t even debuted yet!

Sixteen years ago – when he thought about it, Lu Tong was probably only eighteen years old now, still in high school!

His own mother was still in high school.

Qin Shiwu felt like he was floating without knowing why.

Wait a minute. It seems that Lu Tong’s high school is also Provincial No. 1 High School?

Qin Shiwu quickly calmed down to think. He heard his aunty say that his parents graduated from the same high school.

He had already met Qin Chu just before, and he was studying in Provincial No. 1 High School. There is no doubt that Lu Tong must also be in the Provincial No. 1 High School.

He heard that… his parents fell in love at first sight?

Yes, Qin Shiwu thought, Lu Tong was a famous beauty in school at that time—and an Omega. According to his mother’s appearance, it was no problem to be a school beauty.

Moreover, according to what he heard his aunty said, Lu Tong in high school was famous for being gentle and virtuous; if he was in provincial No. 1 middle school, the Alphas pursuing him should have been lining up in No. 4 High School next door.

After catching this crucial information, Qin Shiwu suddenly sat up straight.

So his parents were in the same school?

Then… was it love at first sight?

Qin Shiwu’s mind suddenly remembered the reason why he was disciplined by Qin Chu.

It seemed to be because he went and hooked up with his father’s woman.

What was his father’s woman’s name… What He Yuanyuan?

Regardless of whether it is from the perspective of the strokes or the number of characters, no matter how the three characters “He Yuanyuan” are disassembled and reorganized, they will not become Lu Tong.

Qin Shiwu swore to God that he never had a little mother named He Yuanyuan.

Therefore, Qin Shiwu was stupefied.

… Fuck!

Qin Shiwu once again spat out fragrantly.

Before he had time to perm his hair, he rushed out of the barbershop and ran all the way to Provincial No. 1 High School, roaring in his heart: my father is having an extramarital affair??!!

If Qin Chu wanted to have an extramarital affair, Qin Shiwu had no problem.

The problem is that if his father doesn’t fall in love with Lu Tong… dare to ask him which stone Qin Shiwu popped out of?

i finished reading the main story and while it’s 90% lighthearted, it gets incredibily painful towards the end…