CH 124

Odette had awaken from the lingering remnants of a dream she was familiar with, a dream she had several times, of walking under the bright green branches of trees in the height of summer. She would come across a man she only knew as the man of the summer solstice, standing in the middle of the road. She could not get hurt here, and under the laced shadows of the trees, she held her head high.

Odette let out a sigh and sat up in the bed. She could sense his presence next to her, but did not want to turn and look at him, she wanted to believe that she was alone.

She stood up and moved to the sofa, but didn’t take more than a few steps before she froze in place. Out of the window, she could see the familiar lights flashing beyond. Her groggy eyes, still clouded with sleep, could make out the Ferris Wheel and with it, the question that had plagued her constantly for the last two years.

‘What if she hadn’t gone to the amusement park with Tira?’

The argument between Tira and their father would not have been so intense, they would never have agreed to the two year marriage and the name Bastian Klauswitz would have been just that, a name attached to a rather handsome young man that Odette would never have talked to. Like dried petals kept between the pages of a book, it would have been nothing more than distant memories.

But the past was not on Odette’s side.

Perhaps if they had been more sincere with each other, things could have been different. Bastian had been quite friendly back then, perhaps she might have had the courage to talk to him about her departure, maybe she wouldn’t have been so afraid of the harsh words of heartbreak.

And yet, the light was not on her side either.

Could they have ever been different to what they are now?

The destination of her thorny thoughts reached an ultimate question that had been lodged deep in her mind for the past two years. She looked back over at Bastian, the lingering glow of the dim light played over him. Somehow, he had woken up and looked right back at her. Their eyes met in the growing light of dawn, encapsulating them.

*.·:·.✧.·:·.*

Bastian was the first to break the awkward silence. “How does it feel to be alone?” he said, the slur in his words and the sleepiness in his eyes gave away how drunk he was.

Odette did not answer him, choosing to instead turn from him as she went over to the side table under the window, poured out a glass of water and brought it over to him.

“What’s this for?”

“You’re drunk,” Odette said plainly.

“I know,” Bastian said, given Odette a puzzled look. He took the glass of water when it became clear Odette was not going to move until he took it. “Oh, yeah, I owe you some money, don’t I.” He downed the glass of water and clumsily got off the bed.

Odette watched him stagger across the bedroom to pull his wallet from his coat. She felt her cheeks heat up from embarrassment, but did her best to ignore it. She did not mind being paid for sex, at least she was getting money to help with her travel expenses.

The silence stretched on as Bastian stared down at the bills in his wallet, as if he had forgotten what he was doing. The chime of the clock roused him from his stupor and he stumbled over to the chair and sat down, he closed his eyes and breathed deeply.  The cold moonlight came through the window,  illuminating his hand holding the money.

Odette sighed and approached Bastian, who did not rouse until she reached a hand out to take the money. He looked up at her, his eyes struggling to focus.

“I will accept payment gratefully,” Odette said as she pulled the bills from the wallet.

This man was supposed to be someone that would never hurt her, sworn to it when they got married, and yet, everything he seemed to do caused her pain. As he looked at her with those clouded blue eyes, she felt a pain in her chest. She had never given him her heart and yet seeing him in this pitiful state hurt.

“You’re always like this,” Bastian said with a crooked smile.

Odette gave him a funny look, which only served to make Bastian laugh as he thought Odette was about to cry. He realised that he must look equally funny in his intoxicated state.

Inside he cursed his choice to marry this woman. He despised the Emperor’s hypocrisy, who gave him burdens like he was the empire’s hero. He also hated Duke Dyssen, the most incompetent fool, wasting his fortune in back alley gambling dens.

It had all been in vain. He regained some mote of his sense of self and found he had been marching on the spot, trapped in the remnants of a deceitful love, like a chained dog waiting for its owner.

“Please settle the bill accurately.” Shereached out and grabbed the money in Bastian’s hand.  

Odette looked at him with what looked to be pity, or disgust. All his efforts to hurt this woman felt like he had the double-edged blade turned the wrong way and the more he tried to wield it, the more of his blood was spilled.

How much more must I endure until you break?

What am I looking for when you break?

Clutching the money in his hand, Bastian’s frustrations grew like an inferno, fed by his passion, he could no longer hold back his emotions as he looked at Odette, who did not cry even though she was full of sadness.

Twisted with agitation, he threw the money into the fireplace and stumbled over to the window and stared out at the blurred lights of the Ferris Wheel. That damned woman loved those twinkling lights. Feeling like he was suffocating, Bastian turned around and burst into laughter.

Odette was bending over and picking up scattered money in front of the fireplace. Her figure, as she was bent over, reminded him of a graceful swan.

Bastian could understand why the Princess went into a rage when she saw Odette picking up broken jewellery. Odette was a woman with the knack for humbling her opponents.

Bastian’s approaching footsteps could be heard, yet Odette remained unfazed, diligently gathering the scattered money. Suddenly his large hand enveloping her shoulder, she could feel the warmth of the fireplace, enough to make the cold slip from her mind.

“Better to cry, Odette. Kneel before me and grovel.” He spat the command at her, a hint of dominance in his words.

“Why?” Odette turned to Bastian, “I already paid my debts the way you wanted me too, right?”

“Debt?” Bastian questioned.

Not wanting Bastian to see how she was starting to flush, turned away from Bastian, but Bastian took hold of her chin and turned her back to him, their eyes locked.

Odette was seized by a surge of overwhelming anger, like a tidal wave crashing onto the coast. She threw the crumpled bills in Bastian’s face and with all her might, she fought him off, but he didn’t back down, not even when her flailing hands slapped him around the face.

Odette felt the world tilt, strong arms wrapped around her and then the sudden crash into the floor. Odette gasped for breath, finding herself on top of Bastian, who had collapsed onto the floor. It hurt and as she looked at him, her eyes filled with a silent scream 

‘I hope you hurt as much as I do.’

At the very moment she acknowledged her first and last desire for this man, the world flipped once again.

Bastian gripped her chin and yanked her in for a kiss, his tongues wrapping around hers and took her breath away. She tried to cry out, but was muffled against his mouth. She scratched at him, slapped him, pulled his platinum hair-which resembled a light that could never be reached. 

His hot breath consumed her cold emptiness. There was no escape.

*.·:·.✧.·:·.*

Bastian was the first to wake up. He quickly realised he had fallen asleep on the floor, a soft warmth pressed against him, it was Odette. They were laid together in front of the fireplace, which had died down to glowing embers.

Gingerly, Bastian rose, trying his best not to wake Odette and put on his robe. He then very carefully picked up Odette. The woman had been quite robust when they first met, but now it felt like she was wasting away with each passing day.

After laying her on the bed, Bastian went to the bathroom to get cleaned up. By the time he returned to the bedroom, towel wrapped around his waist, the dawn light took a firm hold of the day, bathing the room in a clear, blue light.

As he looked down at Odette, he was overcome with a profound sense of emptiness. Even as his love had transformed to resentment, this beautiful woman still remained, like a curse.

Bastian composed himself and set about getting himself ready for the day. He noticed a fresh bruise formed on his cheek when he looked in the mirror to shave. With shaving cream in hand, he gently touched the wound Odette gave him. Fresh memories came in flashes, of the faded allure of the woman, which brought bittersweet disgust to his mind.

Once he had gotten himself ready for the hunting party, Bastian made his way downstairs, requesting to use the phone from one of the servants he crossed, who then showed him to the drawing room. Bastian waited with the receiver to his ear for the familiar voice.

“Hello?” the familiar voice said.

“This is Bastian, the mission has changed.”