CH 73

Why did I call her? What will I do next? My head is blank and I can’t think of anything. We just stared at each other with surprised faces.

“Um…!”

“Ah….”

We try to speak to each other, we speak at the same time and go quiet again. Louisa also has a troubled expression. Maybe I shouldn’t have called out to her. However, if we hadn’t known each other like this, it wouldn’t have become such an embarrassing atmosphere…why am I…?

“Miss Flora, if the carriage is left parked in a place like this, it will be a hindrance to traffic,” Katharina said after she chased after me. “Besides, you also have a few more appointments for today.”

“Ah……” I said.

Louisa and I were still blankly staying at each other. Katharina was right about what she said. I suddenly stopped the carriage, so the people around us stopped walking as they wondered what was going on. Some people are avoiding the carriage that is stopped in the middle of the street. It’s no good if it stays like this.

Besides, just as Katharina said, I’m in the middle of appointments. In this world, where time is loose, to begin with, there is no problem if I take things a bit leisurely, but even so, there is a limit. I can’t keep them waiting forever.

“Um… Louisa…”

“Come on!” Katharina said. “You, too, Miss, hurry up and get in.”

“Huh?” me and Louisa went.

While I was thinking about what to say to Louisa, Katharina went around behind Louisa and started to push her on the back. Without knowing why, Louisa and I are pushed into the carriage.

“Let’s please leave here,” Katharina said.

I didn’t say anything, Katharina was acting on her own. Helmut also resumed driving the carriage. Only me and Louisa don’t know what was going on and were stunned while sitting facing each other.

“………”

Time passes in silence while riding in that rumbling carriage. We glance at each other while looking at each other, but neither of us can say a word.

No! We’ll never get anywhere if we keep brooding like this! Women have to have guts!

“Louisa!” “Floto!”

“I’m sorry!”

“………… Huh?”

We call out to each other at the same time and apologize at the same time. And we stare at each other with dumbfounded faces.

“Why are you apologizing, Louisa?” “Why are you apologizing, Floto?”

“Ah……”

Our voices overlap again. Our breathing syncs up like we’re completely in tune with each other.

“It seems you two are on very good terms, Miss Flora…”

And for some reason, I feel like Katharina was glaring at me. Why is that so? I shouldn’t have done something that would get Katharina to glare at me. To begin with, wasn’t it Katharina who put Louisa in the carriage…?

“Floto… no, it’s better to call you Lady Flora…” Louisa said.

“Mmm, it’s fine if you call me whatever is easiest for you, Louisa,” I said. “When it’s official, it’s necessary to properly use titles properly, but in everyday situations, Floto is fine.”

I’m not used to being called Flora by Louisa. When I met Louisa, she always called me Floto, so her calling me Floto is just like back then… no, no! This is wrong! That’s no good. She remembers what it was like back then. I shouldn’t feel nostalgic for that time I betrayed Louisa and made her sad.

“I see… then I wonder if I can speak normally? I’m not good at titles and such…” Louisa said.

“Yes, that’s fine. Should we speak like before?” I asked.

The way I speak is different from when I was Floto. At that time, I was pretending to be a man, so I was speaking using rough, manly language. Now I’m dressed as Flora… no. This is what it was supposed to be… I look normal for a woman. I speak according to that look, but I avoid speaking too formally. If I speak to Louisa in such a high-and-mighty way, it will be difficult for Louisa to speak. 1

“Mmm. Floto is fine, then,” I said. “It would be strange if we talk like we used to in this outfit. Fufu.”

“Wouldn’t it?” Louisa said.

She smiled a little and the air became lighter. When I was Floto, I tried to speak as casually as possible, but it would be strange if I spoke like that in a “Flora” dress. Imagining that, the two of us quietly laughed together.

“Louisa… I’m sorry about that time. Even if I apologize, I don’t think I’ll be forgiven since I betrayed and hurt you… but I’m still really sorry.”

I finally calmed down and said what I wanted to say. I can’t be satisfied with just that, but still, I said it. It feels like a weight has been lifted from my shoulders.

“Why are you the one apologizing, Floto?” Louisa said. “I’m the one who needs to apologize… Floto, that time, I’m sorry I said all those terrible things. And thank you, for saving me then… finally… finally, I can say it……”

Drip, drip, large tears fall from Louisa’s eyes. The thank you is still understandable. That was probably for killing the Mad Horned Bear. But, she’s sorry, too? Did Louisa say something terrible to me?”

“Why are you apologizing, Louisa?” I said. “There’s nothing for you to…”

“That’s not right!” Louisa cried. “At that time, when I saw Floto embracing your fiancée, His Highness, I realized I was just a poor girl who didn’t belong with you, so I said such horrible things! I hurt you so badly even though you just fought for me. I didn’t even say thank you to you, Floto! I was so jealous that when I saw you’d been completely taken by His Highness! I’m such a wretch!”

Wah…! I don’t know what to say to Louisa who covered her face and started crying. At times like this, I’m reminded that I’m still just a kid who hasn’t lived because I don’t know what to say to her.

“Don’t cry, Louisa,” I said. “I don’t think you said anything wrong. I think it’s only natural that you got mad at me for hiding my true identity from you. I hurt you, so you lashed out in hurt. There is nothing wrong with what you said.”

From sitting across me, I moved beside Louisa and hugged her head. All I can do is stroke her head.

“That’s not right! Listen to me, Floto! I’m…!” Louisa said.

“Yes. Tell me everything,” I said. “Why were you hurt? What were you angry about? I’ll take it all. And if you don’t mind, you can listen to me for a little bit, too?”

After that, Louisa and I talked about what was on our minds. Louisa wanted to be with Floto, she said. So she didn’t really mean to say that, but she just wanted to thank me for helping save her life and to stay with her after that.

Despite this, Louisa found out that “Floto” is actually “Flora”, a woman, and on top of that, she has her fiancé, Ludwig, and Louisa is absolutely no match for Ludwig. Besides, it wouldn’t be strange if the knight Floto was close to the commoner Louisa, but if a margrave’s daughter was close to the commoners, it would be out of proportion. That’s what Louisa thought.

If there was a partner more suitable for Flora right beside her than Lousia, who was absolutely not even close to being acceptable to be around a margrave’s daughter… that would be unbearable. How painful must that be?

In just a short amount of time, Louisa was about to be attacked by a mad horned bear and felt that her life was in danger, then the knight Floto was a completely different person, and next to her was the Third Prince, her fiance.

Even I understand the feeling of a young child suddenly encountering such a series of events and being unable to organize her mind blurting out unnecessary things.

“I understand how you feel Louisa, but there’s nothing wrong with you. Okay? Because I say so, it is,” I said.

“But! I did…!” Louisa said. “I did such a terrible thing to you, Floto… is that why you haven’t come to the farm since then? By the time I thought of apologizing to you, you’d already stopped coming. It was because I hurt you so terribly…”

Aaah… the misunderstanding after that…

“That’s because I was recuperating without being able to leave my house because I was injured then, yeah? Then, right after that, I was called to the royal capital and was knighted… it was quite a while before I was able to return to Carruzan…… which was just before you transferred to the royal capital’s ranch, Lousia.”

“………… Huh?” Louisa said.

She looked up at me with a blank face. That’s about right. There’s no way you can go outside that quickly if you’re wounded like that. I was just a kid around 9 years old…

In any case… weren’t Ludwig and Wilhelm the culprits behind all of Louisa’s misunderstandings, him being the one who came unannounced, and then him being the one who summoned me to the royal capital? I’m getting angrier and angrier.

If Ludwig hadn’t been too familiar and tried to pick me up himself, it might have been Louisa who came to fetch me. Far from this useless knighthood, if it weren’t for the knighting ceremony that tormented me so badly, I might have been able to meet Louisa earlier and clear up the misunderstanding.

Everything is a “what if.” What if that happened instead? There are no what-ifs in history. But I can’t help but think about them.

“How do you know when I was transferred to the royal capital’s ranch?” Louisa asked.

“Because I’m the one who runs it?” I replied.

“Hm?”

“……Hmm?”

We looked at each other and tilted our heads in confusion. Louisa is so cute.

“Huh? What!? Wait! Aren’t Carruzan’s and the royal capital’s ranches run by Margrave Albert?” Louisa said.

“No, he’s not?” I said. “He made the initial investment, but I run it now…”

Ah… come to think of it, I didn’t even say that Floto was the manager. I kept it a secret at the time, and even now, I haven’t said a single word about it in the flow of this conversation.

“Oh, that’s right… so I didn’t know that about you, too… ah!” Louisa cried. “Then why didn’t you come to see me right away?!”

“Uh… that’s… I thought I hurt you, Louisa… I don’t know which identity I should face you with, you know…”

“Ahem…!” Katharina went, clearing her throat. “Miss Flora? That is not the right speech for either face of yours…”

Ah… I couldn’t come up with the right words, so I ended up stumbling and mumbling unlike how a young lady or a knight should be. I got scolded by Katharina. 2

“Is that so…?” Louisa said. “Well, even after I realized that it was you, Floto, I had to be the one to apologize, not you! Because I don’t blame you for anything.”

I see……. we’ve both been thinking that way for a long time.

“But since you requested a transfer to the royal capital, Louisa, I thought you didn’t want to stay in Carruzan, and by extension, didn’t want to see me, Floto.”

“You’ve got it wrong. I wanted to apologize to you, but I couldn’t meet you, because you didn’t come by anymore, so I thought I wouldn’t be able to see you again… at least I learned the magic that you and study at the royal capital. I was thinking that someday I would be useful to you.”

And with that, she smiled self-deprecatingly.

“I’m sure your magical skills would have grown if you studied at the royal capital, wouldn’t they?” I said.

And yet… still with that smile that mocked herself, Louisa shook her head.

“Nope… no matter where I went to a classroom or laboratory that taught magic, I was immediately kicked out…”

“Huh! Louisa?”

You’re kidding……. I should have taught Louisa a lot of magic. Louisa, who should have been so well versed in magic that a commoner would never be able to achieve that, would be turned away from the gates of the royal capital, anywhere she knocked? How powerful are the nobles and people who can use magic in this world…?

At the time, Louisa wasn’t as good at magic as I was, but I thought she was good enough… to think that Louisa couldn’t find work in the royal capital… I wonder if I’ll be able to keep up with the classes at the academy…

“Why were you kicked out?” Katharina asked.

“Huh? Who are you?” Louisa asked.

“Ah, my name is Katharina von Royce, Miss Flora’s maid. Please, call me Katharina. So why were you kicked out?”

“So you’re a noble too… Lady, Katharina, um, I’m…” Louisa said.

“I don’t need a ‘Lady’ or anything so formal,” Katharina said. “So why?”

“Why? Well, let me try to put it simply. Umm… the magic that Floto taught me was so amazing that I was told that no matter where I went, I wouldn’t be able to learn anything from them…”

“I see… I figured that would be the case…” I said.

Even though I’m thinking, I can hear voices talking quietly around me. I can’t concentrate on my thoughts. I’ve been slacking off on my magic training here. There is a slight misunderstanding. I was concentrating only on buff magic development and neglecting the study and research of ordinary magic.

There isn’t much time left before school starts, but I wonder if it’s better to prepare even now…

“… -ra. … Flora. Miss Flora!”

“Huh!? Ah…, um? What was it…?”

Oh n. I think I got a little too absorbed in my own thoughts. I don’t have time to sit around when Louisa is there too. I can’t fix this habit from my previous life. I think it would be better to fix the fact that when I start to focus on myself, I stop listening to people around me… but how can I fix it?

“We’ve arrived!” Helmut said.

“Ahh……” I said.

We seem to have arrived at the mansion they were supposed to visit today. Come to think of it, I was in the middle of appointments. I ou forgot that too…

“Louisa, if you’re going home, I’ll have Helmut drive you right away.”

“Umm… can I wait, if you don’t mind? I still have something I want to talk to you about…” Louisa said.

She looked a bit embarrassed… then, my answer is already decided.

“I’m sorry. Can you wait a little longer? I’ll finish this up soon,” I said to Helmut.

I don’t care about polite greetings with an old man I don’t know. If Louisa will wait for me, I have to finish it immediately and come back…