Book 3: Chapter 4: I Should Have Knocked on Wood

Book 3: Chapter 4: I Should Have Knocked on Wood

The attack happened five days later.

THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT, PETE! Aqua screamed as the enormous, granite-encrusted wallaby thing smashed its tail into the wagon we were hiding under.

SLAGIT, HOW IS THIS MY ELFIN FAULT!?

YOU WERE THE ONE TALKING ABOUT FATE AND EVERYTHING BEING FINE JUST FIVE DAYS AGO!

I THINK FIVE DAYS IS MORE THAN ENOUGH TIME FOR IT TO BE CONSIDERED UNRELATED!

ILL UNRELATE YOUR BEARD FROM YOUR FACE IF WE SURVIVE THIS!!

Both of you, shaddup! Richter hissed from where he was crouched behind a wagon wheel. Stoneskin wombats are mostly blind. Its just goin after tha loudest sound!

Eh, wombat, wallaby, same difference. It was just another garden-variety Aussie murder mammal. It looked like a squash-faced disproportionate kangaroo, with a sheath of stone on its back, kind of like an armadillo, and a club-like tail on its rear. It also had short stubby arms with wickedly long talons built for digging out stone and flesh and a mouth full of far too sharp teeth. Aqua and I shut up, and the wombat spun away as Balin came roaring up behind it. He smashed its nose with his axe and there was the sound of metal on stone as flakes of rock spun off in all directions, one narrowly avoiding my thigh. The wombat reared onto its hind legs, rising up to its full three-metre height, and roared back.

I moved further beneath the wagon and peeked at the quest in the side of my vision.

Quest: Roadside Rumble

Kill the monsters attacking your caravan or drive them off!

Monsters Defeated: 1/5

Rewards: +0.2 Strength

Id wanted more Quests, but not like this!!!

The ground thundered as the monster traded blows with the [Heroic Moment]d Balin. Each rock-hard butt attack was met with an equally fearsome axe strike, or shield smash, and the sound reverberated in the space beneath the wagon. This was what Balin was doing in the dungeon all the time!? Dear Gods!!!

Pete, where are the other ones? Aqua asked, rubbing her hands worriedly. And do you see Annie?

I glanced at my mental [Minimap], where three large red dots were currently running amok in the caravan, each encircled by a group of green dots.

Like I said before, I cant tell whos who on here, but theres one wombat down, one fighting up by Copperpots wagon, the one over there, one down by Berrys and I dont know where the other one is. Its just Balin and

There was a flash of light followed by Balin screaming, Its blind ya daft ninny!

- Aishablue here fighting the adult. I think theyre just keeping it occupied until everyone else finishes off the small ones. I finished.

Annie should be at Berrys wagon, I really hope shes okay. Aqua whimpered, and hid behind me as the wombat was beaten back and flung to the ground beside the wagon. It was close enough that we could feel the rancid wet breath whuff out of it.

Aquas hand was shaking where it held onto my shoulder. I considered that shed once had her entire clan killed in front of her in a similar situation, and pulled her close.

Well be fine. Weve got great guards, and their ambush didnt go off. Its ooookay. Shh, shh, shh. Just keep your [Nothingness] activated and nothing will notice you. I rocked her in my arms like I once had my little Sammy, and she shivered.

My [Minimap] was the only reason this wasnt going much, much, worse.

But not before Id dropped a bottomless barrel of highly flammable oil down the shaft itd made.

10,9,8,7,6,5,4,3. 2. 1. That should be enough oil, do it. I muttered, keeping an eye on the red dot. It hadnt strayed far, and was probably coming around for another pass. From Richters wand a head-size bead of fire leapt out and down into the shaft.

A second later there was a WHOMP, and black smoke and flames erupted from the hole beneath the wagon. They were followed by a terrible screeching sound.

Ooooh, I hope that doesnt catch. I groaned, but thankfully the flames quickly died down, leaving a plume of black smoke and scorched wood.

The red dot didn't disappear from directly beneath us though, and I frowned. From the horrible sounds coming from the hole, we had to have bady hurt it, so where -

The ground beneath me jumped again, and I barely had time to push Aqua away and activate [Flesh of Stone] before a charred set of jaws clamped around my leg.

I was treated to a terrifying couple breaths of blackness. I watched my [Minimap], praying that my stoneified body wasnt getting dragged underground into a fiery hell.

Then, the red dot winked out, and the world snapped back into focus along with a sharp pain in my ankle. I was halfway underground, and RIchter and Aqua had each grabbed an arm and were holding on tight. I could feel the wet-stickiness of the wombats saliva on my leg, and I kicked its teeth free from my armored boot. I was incredibly lucky the tunnel wasnt more vertical, or its dead weight wouldve been enough to drag me down.

Aqua and Richter pulled me out of the hole, and we stared at each other in shock.

*Bing!*

Quest Updated: Roadside Rumble

Monsters Defeated: 2/5

Then Richter gave a bark of laughter, and I joined in a moment later. Relief poured out of us in waves of giggles. A sharp tooth the size of my fist was stuck into my boot, where itd lodged into my armored sock.

A dwarf never left home without armored socks.

I cant believe that worked! I wiped away a tear.

Me neitha. Richter chuckled.

Down the road behind us, Berrys Ability boosted voice suddenly broke over the landscape. She was singing the words to Alicia Keyss Girl on Fire.

Richters mouth dropped agape at something only he could see, and a moment later flaming meteors began to rain down from the empty black sky.

Showoff I muttered.

*Bing!*

Quest Complete: Roadside Rumble

Are you really going to let other Chosen show you up like that?

Gained 0.2 Strength! Your new strength is 16.6!

I am absolutely shaving you while you sleep tonight, Pete. Aqua sniffed.

Not. my. FAULT!