About five seconds after Mal first conversed with the unusally chipper bird; three individuals appeared outside on top of the mountain.
And Malachi, for all of his new power, almost died immediately.
"KYAAAA!! Why the hell are you naked?!?" Thea was always extremely cheerful and the one who seemed to have the calmest head while being a bit sexually charged.
However, the sight of a naked man was apparently way too much for her innocent mind to handle.
Her face turned beet red, and she screamed out like a little girl.
Belloc and Apophis, who had also appeared outside with her, immediately rushed to cover their sister's eyes.
They glared at Malachi like he was worse than a park flasher.
"What the fuck is wrong with you, bozo?! The hell do you think you're showing my innocent sister?!"
'Innocent...?' Joanne questioned.
"Put your damn clothes on right now or I will burn you to ash..!"
Malachi had been seen naked by so many people accidentally at this point that he didn't even perceive it as problematic anymore.
However, the two black and purple flames that the brothers summoned overhead made him remember that being naked wasn't just indecent, but dangerous too.
"Ah... Sorry The-"
""STOP TALKING TO HER WITH YOUR DICK OUT!!!""
Two columns of flame fell right on the spot where Malachi once stood and created a large crater in the once unblemished mountaintop.
The friendly lowbreed Lolo poked her head out from underneath a mass of bushes as she trembled terribly from the fright.
Joanne started to snap when she remembered just how strong the two brothers were and knew that they of all people shouldn't be haphazardly attacking Malachi.
"It was just an accident... Dragons are so short tempered."
"Eh?"
Joanne slowly turned her head to the side when she noticed that her fiance had somehow ended up beside her at some point without her knowledge.
And he was even wearing pants again. (Though she never minded the view to begin with)
"When... did you get here?"
"A couple seconds ago?"
"How?"
"I walked?"
"What do you mean you walked!?"
"Like that old Christas special song; Put one foot in front of the other and-"
"I-I know how walking works it's just... N-Nevermind, babe."
Joanne was as smart as a whip and calculative to a fault, but if she didn't have to use her brain to think she wasn't going to.
Being with Malachi had given her many moments where she had to just chalk circumstances up to 'My man is just special like that' and kept it pushing for the sake of time.
"We're a lot faster now, boss, didja notice that??" The giant bird asked from beside Malachi. "We were like; 'Zoom'! And big sis Jo was like 'What the hell' but we were like 'This is just another day baby' and now, w-"
*Emi emphasized 'Booo'*
Sweet Sei: 'What did he do? Is it good??'
Jo: 'I'm so glad at least one of you is normal...'
-
After less than a minute of investigation, the Tathamet siblings came up with a theory that they were certain was iron-clad.
"Seems like your different powers kind of manifested themselves into their own unique creatures with personalities and autonomy in an attempt to stop your body from splitting itself apart." Thea explained casually.
""Excuse me!?"" Mal and Joanne asked in unison.
"What did you expect?" she shrugged as she reached out to the lion to pet him. "You're holding too much divine power in your body and soul right now and you aren't even a real demigod."
"If you weren't able to take these three out freely so that they could come and go; you probably would have exploded by sunset." Oddly enough, Belloc seemed disappointed that wasn't going to happen.
"I don't know how your body developed this kind of failsafe, but you better thank your lucky stars for it." Apophis finished.
"Yes! Be grateful for us!" The bird nodded proudly.
Malachi petted the feathered creature absentmindedly as he thought of the person who was likely the true reason why he wasn't a burning ball of ash right now.
It had only been a day, but he was really worried for his mother.
The longer he thought about it, the more determined he was to go and visit her.
But she had already made her desire to be left alone perfectly clear.
And he could only respect that and send his love from afar... for now.
"It'd be smart of you to not keep these three inside of yourself for longer than nine hours at a time... probably less if you've been exerting yourself." Apophis confessed. "You're just a little too strong for your own good now."
Malachi heard something that immediately made him perk up and he grinned like a Cheshire Cat; revealing his teeth that were still as sharp as ever.
"Oh yeah? Starting to feel a little afraid of me yet?"
Apophis rolled his eyes dismissively, as did his brother. "One day I hope you understand the significance of weight classes, kid. And the dangers of trying to punch above your own."
"Right, right, I get it..." Mal held up his hands. "You're just afraid I could make you look bad in front of Serana."
A thick vein bulged in Apophis' forehead as the air around him became noticeably warmer. "I'm sorry... what was that?"
"No sweat bro, I really do get it. I'm in love too and I also don't want to be shown up in front of my girls."
'Why are we suddenly involved in this...?' Joanne wanted to ask.
Malachi wrapped his arm around his fiancé and waived the dragons goodbye as he began to head inside.
"Hold up, you little bastard..."
A strong grip landed on his shoulder and crushed all of the bones inside with ease.
"You can't seriously think I'm going to let that go, can you?"
Malachi smiled imperceptibly to himself.
Joanne continued to sip her water while she thought about what she'd like for breakfast.
'I don't understand men at all... I feel like today is going to be a long one.'