A Haunted Coupling (Paper Mario)
A/N: A Haunted Coupling was a commissioned one shot from back in February of 2021. Posting it up here and now for people to enjoy!
Summary: In which a young man gets dared to take a walk in some haunted woods and ends up encountering an actual ghost. She's not anything like he's expecting however.
Themes: Inhuman Sex, Rough Sex, Oral Sex
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Adam is doing all of this on a dare, just to be clear. He's not so foolish as to find walking through a wooded park just after dark to be FUN, especially when the place is rumored to be haunted. But then, that's what dudes do. They dare each other to do stupid things, like throw rocks at cars, or walk through a haunted wood late at night all alone.
His friends had left him at one end of the park and told him they'd circle around and meet him at the other. If he came out the other side unscathed, then he won. Should be easy enough, right? After all, it's not like Adam actually believed in ghosts. Only, he couldn't help but jump at every little sound that caught his ear around him.
And given that this was a rather densely wooded park, well... there were a lot of sounds. His own movement through the place probably caused most of them, if not directly via his boots snapping twigs, then indirectly by sending critters and such running away from him thanks to his presence. It was night fall, and he was probably the only human out here, so of course the woods would come alive.
OoooOooooO...
What was that? Whipping around, Adam tries to find the source of the strange noise, but he can't see anything. His tension winds up another notch as he uses the light on his phone to try and get a good look at his surroundings. Unfortunately, while the flashlight is good enough to illuminate the ground directly in front of him, so he doesn't trip over a branch and snap his ankle or something, it's not very good for much more than that. Anything ten feet or so away just doesn't get illuminated.
Shivering a bit to himself, Adam continues on his way, trying hard not to get turned around. So long as he keeps going straight down the path, he should be fine. He'll come out the other side of the park and it'll all be over. He just needs to calm his nerves before he gets there, or else they'll think he was scared or someth-
ooooOoooOooo~
Okay, he DEFINITELY heard something that time. Frowning slightly, Adam speaks up.
"Is someone there? Fred? Kelly? James? Is this one of you, trying to fuck with me?"
It would be just like his friends to sneak back into the park halfway through and mess with him. In fact, he almost finds himself relaxing at the thought. It MUST be one of them. All the other noises he's hearing sound like natural forest life, but these weird moans... they're definitely not natural. And he REFUSES to believe they're supernatural.
Scoffing, Adam's racing heart begins to calm as he straightens his spine and continues on his way. He's going to get to the other exit of the park and when they aren't there, he'll just go home and send them all an angry text in respo-
"BOO!"
"HOLY FUCKING SHIT!"
It's not just the sudden explosion of noise right in front of his face. A simple 'boo!' would not be enough to jump scare Adam, he'd like to think. It's the 'boo!' combined with the monster that jumps out of him, a glowing green blob with what looks like claws at first, along with a fanged maw. Screaming like a little girl, Adam falls back on his ass, scrambling in the park's underbrush.
After that first moment of terror passes however, the green blob coalesces a bit more and pulls back away from him. What had at first been a horrifying monster, is suddenly just... a round floating spirit with girlish bows on either side of it's head and even expressive eyelashes to make it look distinctly feminine despite it's inhuman shape.
Meanwhile, what he'd thought were claws are just these little stubby hands of sorts, and while she does indeed have fangs, they're much cuter at a second glance, poking out of a mouth that is now grinning widely.
"Ahaha! You've just been boo'd by Lady Bow! No need to thank me, mortal, I know that you're almost certainly astounded by my beauty!"
... She's not really that 'beautiful'. At least, not in any conventional sense of the word. She's quite literally a floating orb. Cute, maybe, but beautiful? Still, Adam knows not to say that out loud, he's not looking to piss off whatever the fuck this is. Lady Bow? 'Boo'd'? Is she... is she a ghost? Is this what ghosts look like? She's almost ethereal in a way, and she looks like nothing he's ever seen before if he's being honest.
Unfortunately, before he can figure out what he SHOULD say in place of insulting the self-identified Lady, Lady Bow's gaze slips down to his crotch... and she notices something at the same time Adam does. His eyes widen and his cheeks flush in embarrassment, while Lady Bow's mouth curls wider and wider in a grin fit for the Cheshire Cat himself. She brings one of her stubby little hands up to her mouth in a failed attempt to cover up her giggles... as she stares down at his tented crotch.
It's not his fault! And it's certainly not because he's aroused by this weird-ass ghost's appearance or anything like that! It's just... ever since puberty, something's been fucked in Adam's head. He can't explain it, but he's sure it's an actual medical condition. Basically, whenever he gets scared by something, if it's enough to really get his heart racing and his blood flowing... well, his blood flows downwards as well. And he gets an erection.
It's weird, and Adam knows it's weird, but it's just how he works. He gets aroused when he gets scared. Scaroused, one might say. It's a real thing, he's pretty sure! Look it up!
"No you did not, Lady Bow. And yet, you did scare me quite badly... I'm due some recompense, the way I figure."
"W-Why, I never! You want m-me to pay Y-YOU back with my b-body?!"
"... You said it, not me."
Before she can respond, he thrusts forward. Unable to wait any longer, his cock positively THROBBING with need, Adam shoves himself up into the ghost lady from behind, holding her by her sides and slamming her back onto his cock. Whatever Lady Bow might have said is lost to time as she lets out a long, wanton, squealing moan instead, her eyes rolling up in her head and her overly large tongue lolling out of her mouth, right beneath her cute little fangs.
It's like... it's like having his own personal onahole, in a way. Holding onto her is nothing like holding onto a woman. It's more like fucking a sex toy, like one of those things that's just the crotch of a woman, the hips, ass, and pussy and that's it. It's strange, but in a way, it's also appealing. None of the legs or arms to deal with and get in the way, Adam supposed.
His cock drives deep into Lady Bow's cunt time and time again as he fucks her, all the while she's squealing and moaning up a storm. Not to mention her tits. He wonders if she's regretting her new tits by this point, because the massive ghostly mammaries are currently bouncing up into her face, jiggling wildly all over the place as he slams her down onto his dick again and again.
That's the other thing. Her pussy feels nothing like a living human's pussy. But then, Adam supposes it wouldn't. He's not necessarily huge by any means, but he is well-endowed. Unfortunately, most of the women he's been with so far in life have had small pussies, leaving him bottoming out inside of them without ever getting to go ball's deep, so to speak.
This is not the case with Lady Bow. Her entire cunt swallows his entire length with every thrust into her. His cock disappears inside of her orb-shaped body time and time again, and her ghostly green backside bounces against his crotch over and over. It feels amazing, to finally go balls-to-the-wall inside of a woman, even if that woman isn't normal by any conventional definition of the word.
It's amazing... and it honestly can't last forever. It feels too damn good, and after what feels like both an eternity and not long enough at all, Adam is letting out a hoarse shout as he finishes inside of Lady Bow. He cums in her and her pussy takes his load just as well as her mouth did, positively slurping his cum up as he fills her to the brim and then some.
It's only after the fact, as he's coming down from the high and experiencing post-coitus clarity, that Adam begins to question what he just did. What if he'd pissed Lady Bow off? What if he'd misread her and the situation, and now he was about to be attacked by a ghost beyond his comprehension?
Luckily, that's not the case. Lady Bow does physically accost him a moment later, but only to grab him by the arm, her new 'chest' wrapping around him on both sides as she looks up at him and sighs happily.
"Ah, my lord... that was... wonderful. Of course, you WILL have to take responsibility."
Blinking, Adam gulps at that.
"Uh... what do you mean?"
Beaming at him, Lady Bow giggles as she begins to tug him along the path.
"Why, after a copulation like that, how are we anything BUT husband and wife? From now on, you are my husband, and as I am a Lady, you are now a Lord! Come, let us return home so we can fornicate some more and maybe even make some heirs!"
Adam's mouth opens and closes soundlessly as he's pulled along. He's about to ask what exactly they're the Lord and Lady of, when they pull out of the woods and find themselves in front of a massive mansion. It's around that point that Adam realizes something very important. He's... not in the park anymore. He isn't sure how long it's been since he WAS in the park, to be frank. Had he entered Lady Bow's lands when he wasn't looking? Had she pulled him here sometime during their sexual encounter, or just now as they were walking along?
... Either way, it doesn't look like he's going to be accomplishing his bet any time soon. In the end, all Adam can do is make the best of the situation...
...
"Wait, did you say HEIRS?!"
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