Chapter 103 - A Mother's Pain

Lin Qianru stared at the huge mansion in front of herself. Her hand held the card that was given to her by Mr. Chi.

With hesitant steps, she stepped forward and went to the security guard who was guarding the door. She didn't need to do anything because as soon as she showed the card to the guard he allowed her in.

That's what Mr. Chi had told her after she had called him the early morning and said that she wanted to accept his offer.

Earning more money than she could earn as a waitress in a restaurant where she is not given any respect was obviously a better option especially when she could do something she liked.

She would not need to do that much hard work also.

For the last two months, since she had started working in the restaurant she had found that her body got tired very soon now..

Her stomach also used to hurt sometimes. Although the pain was not frequent, she doesn't want to take any chance. The last time, when she had got sick and needed surgery, Mo Roulan had to manage everything by herself.

Fortunately, she had a sensible daughter who handled everything very well and also made her understand how by giving up on herself, she was committing a large mistake.

Her children were so small at that time.

After seeing the cruelty and vicious heart of Su Mian and Wen Zuyan, she doesn't even dare to imagine what could happen to her children if she had died back then.

So this time when she has gotten an opportunity to avoid a little hard work then she should hold onto that opportunity tightly.

"Hello, I was told by Mr. Chi to come here."

She said to the middle-aged man who was supposedly the butler.

The butler smiled kindly and said enthusiastically.

"Yes, Yes, please come inside, Mrs.…"

Lin Qinaru's smile didn't falter even for a second as she answered

"Miss Lin."

The butler also didn't change his expression as he accepted the name and said

"Miss Lin, Master has already told me that you will come."

"Would you like to have some water, Miss Lin?"

"No, It would be great if you can directly show me the kitchen and tell me the whereabouts of ingredients."

The butler looked very satisfied by her hard-working attitude and smiled widely as he started to walk towards the kitchen.

"Please come with me then."

With a joyful smile, Lin Qianru followed the butler. Perhaps it was because of the kindness and enthusiastic aura around the butler, she was already feeling very comfortable.

She might have not taken the wrong decision this time…right?

She sighed. Even if she found something wrong then she could always leave the job. It's not like she has resigned from the restaurant. She has just taken one week's leave from the restaurant.

Although it felt a little embarrassing if Mr. Chi came to know about her small plans, she could only do this.

She just hoped that everything from here would go well.

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Sitting inside the bus, Mo Roulan wondered over what she said in front of Cheng Yang.

She had prepared herself very well but when she sat in front of Cheng Yang saw the blank eyes of the seventeen-year-old boy, her mind went blank. She just said whatever came in her heart and mind.

At that moment, she thought that no amount of heartfelt words can make Cheng Yang believe that he couldn't be blamed for his father's death.

The only person who could give him some relief and peace of mind was his mother. After expressing her thoughts, she didn't say anything else and silently accompanied Cheng Yang.

As she knew that pressuring him too much could also lead everything in the opposite direction.

But now thinking about everything, she thinks that everything depended solely on Mrs. Cheng's reaction.

If Mrs. Cheng reacted aggressively at Cheng Yang's revelation then would Cheng Yang be ever able to himself from his guilt?

Mo Roulan sighed and leaned against the headrest of her seat.

She could only pray that Cheng Yang would come out of the trauma he was going through.

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Cheng Yang stood up from the floor and walked towards the switches.

His hands rose to switch off the light. He disliked the light. The darkness was more better. It made him comfortable.

However, his gaze suddenly caught something outside the door of his room that was slightly opened.

He recognized the figure seating outside the room.

In a normal situation, he would have immediately closed the door and went back to his previous seat, however, today he didn't do this.

He stepped forward slowly and opened the door to get a clear view of the outside.

His blank eyes looked at his mother who was seating in front of his room. Her head was lowered and she was staring at the floor.

"Take care of your mother."

The words rang in Cheng Yang's ears. His father had told him before taking his last breath.

He felt very scared suddenly and wanted to go back to his room but at this moment his mother raised his head and looked at him.

With blank eyes, Cheng Yang saw how red and swollen his mother's eyes were. Her face looked very pale.

She looked completely different from the young and lively woman before her husband's death.

'You did it. You are the reason behind everything.'

A voice said in his mind. 

The next moment, the voice in his mind was interrupted by a whisper.

"Cheng Yang."

Cheng Yang again looked at his mother who seemed as if she would start crying the next moment.

'…Because I think it's was not your fault.'

Someone had said these words to him.

His heart was conflicted. What should he do?

He wanted to run away. The eyes of his mother full of motherly love seemed to prick his heart like thorns.

The thought that the same eyes would be filled with hatred if once he told her everything scared him ruthlessly.

What should he do?

'She has the right to know everything. Because Cheng Yang, she didn't lose only her husband that day, she also lost her son.'

The words revolved in his mind making his heart clench as he looked at his mother who seemed so vulnerable.

He wanted to hug her mother and be hugged by her just like he used to do in his childhood.

"Mom…"

A whisper unconsciously escaped from his lips.

"Cheng Yang"

Mrs. Cheng whispered in shock and happiness when she heard her son calling her. Her lips trembled and hit tears fell down from her eyes. 

"My son…Come to mother."

She opened her arms widely and looked at him with hopeful eyes.

Cheng Yang blankly looked at those arms for a few seconds.

"Please…Mother really misses you… Cheng Yang. "

Mrs. Cheng pleaded.

She was feeling very alone. Her husband who used to love her so much suddenly left her and from the same day her son also started to act so repulsively.

He closed himself in a room. She was lost in her own grief and didn't care for him. Thinking that he needs some time, she left him to deal with his sorrow by himself.

It has been very late when she realized that her son had gone away from her ….very far away, where she didn't even know she would be able to reach him.

His blank eyes, his silence, and his screaming whenever she neared him …all of it was very hurtful.

What wrong did she do? Mrs. Cheng questioned herself.

Did Cheng Yang blame her for leaving him alone?

"Cheng Yang…mother is sorry…very sorry. I should not have left you alone at that time. You can punish mother, however, you want. Just …don't be like this. It makes me feel scared and alone. Mother is trying very hard…to manage everything …mother will try harder…"

Mrs. Cheng sobbed as she blabbered whatever came into her mind.

The whole night she was sitting on her husband's grave. She had not slept because she couldn't.

Whenever she closed her eyes, she would hear her son's screams. She was feeling like she would go crazy at any moment.

"Cheng Yang…"

Mrs. Cheng was horrified when Cheng Yang suddenly fell down in front of her on his knees. His eyes were red and he was crying endlessly.

"I'm sorry, Mom…I'm sorry…It was my fault."

Mrs. Cheng cried hard seeing her son's condition. She crawled to him slowly, afraid of startling him. Her hesitant and trembling hands took his face in her hands.  

"Cheng Yang…"

She cupped his cheeks and wiped his tears.

"Ssshh… It's alright, My son. Don't cry."

As she said this, her own tears continued falling from her eyes.

But Cheng Yang was murmuring continuously.

"It was my fault, Mom…It was my fault…I killed dad…I killed him…It was my fault."

Mrs. Cheng who was amidst wiping his son's tears froze. She started at Cheng Yang's face blankly.

Cheng Yang noticed this. His heart was shrinking because of fear but he didn't stop.

"It was me who was driving the car that day. He refused but …I insisted. I killed dad…It was my fault…"