Chapter Two Hundred and Seventeen - Colourless Green Ideas Slither Furiously

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Chapter Two Hundred and Seventeen - Colourless Green Ideas Slither Furiously

Chapter Two Hundred and Seventeen - Colourless Green Ideas Slither Furiously

I was the first one down the ladder through the well and into the dungeon's central cave, mostly owing to the fact that I had a skirt, and it would be a bit rude to have someone go first.

Emmanuel came last. He was very much not built for ladders, so it was strange seeing him climb down, all six limbs working carefully to hang onto the ladder until he twisted around and jumped off to land on solid ground.

Amaryllis created a couple of lights to supplement the glowing mushrooms and moss and such, and we all kind of just... decompressed for a bit.

That was awful, I said.

It can be a tough one, Howard said. But if were all here, that means that none of us are Mist-folk. They cant leave their floor.

So we all made it out alive and hale, Bastion said. Other than one minor injury.

Hardly much of an injury, Amaryllis said.

I think that her pride was bruised a bit more than her flesh.

We should relax for a bit, I said. I need it.

I suppose, Emmanuel replied. Though I am looking forward to a bit more of a challenge.

I didnt. That last floor had been terrible. I hope the next floor isn't so rude, I said.

Awen pat me on the back. Itll be okay. Do you want to make some tea? she asked.

No one seemed to think that was a bad idea, so we found a spot nearby that was nice and flat, laid down some blankets and sat around for a bit of tea. Bastion let me use the water in one of his waterskins, and I set out the little tin mugs I carried with me on the ground while the water came to a slow boil.

Do you have a lot of trouble with that last floor? I asked Howard.

No, not really, Howard said. But then, most of the time were no more than three. Not all of us are close friends too. The occasional undeserved slap is the worst that usually happens, though it can take a while to get through the floor. Sometimes the town keeps shifting around and you can get mighty lost.

Huh, I said. It was really hard for us. Well, at least for me.

Different folk have different challenges, Howard said. Didnt expect it, else Id have tried to prepare more things for the floor. Maybe give you all some pickled fish to carry in your pockets. I wasnt the only one giving him a strange look. For the smell.

Oh, I said.

Bastion took his cup when I handed it over. The next floor, what can you tell us about it?

Third floor. That ones interesting, Howard said. Not usually a problem. The challenge is fairly straightforward, most of the time. Theres a bit of fighting, though. That wasnt always the case.

Emmanuel perked up at that. Fighting?

Yep. The next floor opens up in this cave with a sort of castle in it. Some folk call it a mansion, but I dont rightly think anyone from Insmouth has seen a mansion before. Used to be that the monsters outside it would leave you alone, but theyve grown aggressive since that root settled in. Big squid-like creatures. Not an easy fight, but not too tough either. Those that arent aggressive should just be left to mind their own.

Is that the whole of it? I asked. Awen sipped her tea and made a bit of a face, so I rooted around for some honey in my pack. I still had a little somewhere.

No, no. The challenge is inside the castle, Howard said. Theres a creature, a grand monster, incomprehensible to gaze upon. He has more eyes than there are stars in the sky, and his grasp reaches across his domain.

I swallowed.

His name is Jim, and he wants to have tea and talk, Howard continued.

I paused, my teacup by my lips. Huh?

The fishman shrugged. Im being honest. The monster wants you to sit down at his table and talk. He is very polite, but you need to answer his questions. Howard shifted. You need to answer them honestly. He will often ask very probing questions. They can make things quite awkward. But its better to be honest than to fight him.

No, not walk. It was... sliding?

I took a moment of observing to figure it out. The monster wasnt wearing any sort of robe. Its robe was entirely made up of thick tentacles, layered over each other and draping down to its... well, where its feet would be if it didnt just have more tentacles.

It was really dark, or maybe more of a purple? I narrowed my eyes and tried to decide what colour the monster was, but I couldnt make it out. It was definitely a colour. Either yellow or pink. It wasnt changing colours either, it was just--

Dont stare too much, lass, Howard said.

Right, I muttered with a shake of my head.

A Colourless of Insmouth, agitated, level 10.

Get ready, Bastion said. We formed a rough line, with Howard stepping back a bit, and both Bastion and Emmanuel coming to the front.

I cleared my throat and lowered my spade. Hello Mister Colourless. My name is Broccoli. Were just here to see the core, would you min-- eep! I hopped back as the front of the monsters robes split and a long, rope-like tendril... kind of flopped in my general direction?

If it was supposed to be a whip, then it was a whip flicked by someone who didnt work out very much.

Huh, I said.

Bastion and Emmanuel both shot forwards and skewered the Colourless with the points of their swords.

It proceeded to flop onto the ground, dead.

That was... underwhelming, I said.

Theyre not very good in a fight, Howard said.

More of them are coming, Amaryllis pointed out.

A glance deeper in the room revealed five had broken away from the main group, all slithering and wobbling our way. Sometimes their hats would rise enough that I could make out the big, cuttlefish-like eyes underneath.

The rest of the Colourless were standing here and there, minding their own business.

Weird, I said.

Free experience, Amaryllis countered. Her hand flashed out and a beam of crackling light speared out ahead, twisted in the air, and crashed into one of the monsters, sending it reeling back even as sparks danced across its oily skin.

I didnt know how to feel about that. Then again, I was pretty miffed at the dungeon.

Oh hoh! A fight then! Emmanuel said. He immediately broke formation and ran ahead, sword swinging above his head.

Wait! Bastion called back. That idiot.

I heard Awen sigh before she raised her crossbow. Sorry Broc, she said.

What for? I asked.

I know you wanted to try talking first, Awen said. Its a good thing, but I dont think it would have worked here.

Oh, I said. Yeah.

Awen smiled, then she fired a bolt with a dull thump and one of the Colourless flopped to the ground.

I sighed. At least it was better than the last floor. Much better.

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