C151

I had wondered if I could have a child, and the vague suspicion was quickly dispelled, and the Emperor's statement that I was pregnant dispelled all my doubts.

When I was pregnant with the first one, I always vomited and always got upset when I couldn't eat. But then, I didn't feel anything.

So I ordered myself to sleep well and eat some sour food without vomiting. When I said I was tired, the cold smile in his eyes was taunting.

The words that I couldn't help but doubt between Rinloran floated up one by one.

He said to Xia Juntang, "You will really kill me."

I thought I was too badly wounded to be able to fight back, but it never occurred to me that it wasn't a small birth.

What did I become?

It was like a snowstorm. The snow that covered the sky came towards me and covered me, drowning the last bit of the temperature. It darkened bit by bit and my body shook twice. I almost fell down.

I held on to the tree and dug my fingers into it. Why didn't I feel any pain? Was I dreaming? Or was it too unreal? It was just a joke she was talking about.

"I say you are pitiful, haha." She laughed wildly. "This Concubine already had Palace Head Ning feed you medicine. Fool, fool, the stupidest fool in the palace, the stupidest fool in the world." I was just a big joke in front of her. I came to see her and brought her something, but what was I?

I was such a fool, and my body was trembling. I walked up to her and gave her a hard slap that made my palm go numb and made her laugh even harder.

I'm a fool, and I don't need her to say so. I'm a fool.

What a wicked woman. I bit my lip to hold back the little stab of pain in my heart, and it broke again, spreading to every part of my body.

"Empress." The reason why the palace maid came forward.

I looked at him coldly and heard my voice saying, "The reason is that I want to upload him to Imperial Physician Lin."

He didn't know how he sat down, or how he even lacked the strength to sit outside the cold palace. The palace maids stood to his left and right, not daring to make a sound.

After a long while, he hurriedly brought Imperial Physician Lin over and said anxiously, "The Empress must be feeling uncomfortable. Could it be that she was contaminated with evil Qi when she went to the Cold Palace?"

I raised my face and coldly looked at Lin Luoshui, still as elegant and dignified as before. I told them to go down and stand guard, then I stood beside him and ruthlessly slapped him. His face was covered in blood and he cried out loudly, "Liar."

This swindler, the number one genius doctor in the capital, was a swindler. I trusted him so much, but he lied to me.

The blood on his face is the blood that came out from my fingernails in the palm of my hand. The half of his handsome face is covered with blood, which is somewhat sinister, but his eyes are so calm that he sighs deeply: "If hitting me can make you breathe a little bit, then just hit me. If you can't hurt me, then I'll hurt you."

"How could you lie to me? Whether you bully me because I have no one to rely on in the palace or whether you bully me because I'm alive, no one will care about my life anymore. " I cried.

There was self-blame in his eyes. "No, Zhiqiu."

"You are not allowed to call me by my name. You are not worthy. I trust you that much and respect you. However, why are you lying to me? I truly hate you. Do you know?" 'I really hate you. You actually lied to me for such a thing. Then, if I continue to live, I will just be seen as a joke by others.

"I thought it would be better if you didn't know." He felt somewhat helpless.

The more he spoke, the angrier I got. "What do you mean I don't know if it will be better? Have you ever thought about my feelings? You're not me, how do you know it's me? I, Yun Zhiqiu, with my lowly status, how can you call me your friend? You can even make your own decisions, but you feel that someone like me has no right to know about it, don't you? " Wiping away his tears, his crying became more and more sorrowful.

He shook his head. "No, Zhi Qiu."

"Yes, yes. Tell me, do I have a child?"

Breathing hard, he glared at me to see if he would lie again, if he would lie to me again.

He sighed slightly and said with a deep expression, "No."

I closed my eyes. My heart wanted to scream out even more. What was pressing down on me? The pain made me almost unable to stand up.

"Then why did you say my baby is gone?"

"Don't be like that, Zhiqiu."

"Go, I will never see you again. I will pretend that I have never met you before, you are all talking about me, you are all saying that I do not know if I might be happier, but I have discovered that I am just an idiot. Other people look at me and I'm just a fool. Enough is enough, I really feel very uncomfortable. I squatted down, too heartbroken to stand up.

I always knew why Xia Junchang wanted to apologize to me. That sentence, even if he wanted to say something, he had to say it out loud.

But I do not understand, Xia Juntang said to love oneself well.

He knew that everyone in this palace was fake, and the emotions in this palace were all fake.

How hateful, to live in a dream of lies.

In the end, it had shattered. This was reality, and no one could accept what had happened.

"Empress, allow this subordinate to first bandage the Empress's hand." He stared at my bleeding hands.

I pointed my finger at him, but kept trembling. "Leave," I said coldly.

Filled with guilt, he stopped standing there and turned around to leave.

That heavy and powerless back would only make me hate him. Did he think that he had done the right thing?

Reality is reality, why do I have to live in a dream? Do they not feel sorry for me when they see me laughing, when they see everyone flattering me?

Scram, scram. What I hate the most is deceit.

Sitting on the board of the bamboo house, I looked up at the sun, saw its white flowers, and my eyes were so white I couldn't see anything, and I forgot to cry for my sadness, and to touch my palm.

"Empress." For this reason I called out to him in a low voice.

"Go away." I snapped coldly.

She did not bother me any longer, and stood there with the palace maid silently in the sun.

Sweat or tears quietly slid down my forehead, wetting my hair.

I closed my eyes. There was only one thing that reminded me to love myself, and that was not to hurt myself.

Why did you deceive me, why did you use me? He said, word for word, Love me, he doted on me, he would walk with me, he would carry me back, he would eat the noodles I made.

But why is he so cruel to me? Is that love?

The sun was burning hotter and hotter in the afternoon, and sweat was dripping down my clothes, but I didn't feel its warmth. I was too tired to sit down and lie down on the plank, and I wanted to hold on to myself, but I didn't want to move.

A light fragrance surrounded me as he reached out to hug me. "Zhiqiu, wake up. Don't lie here. You'll get sick."

It was his voice, gentle and gentle.

Lightly, gently, she picked me up, as if I were a soft child.

I didn't open my eyes to look at him. I didn't want to see someone like him, someone who I'd once had a crush on.

Enough, thoroughly enough.

"Zhiqiu, I will bring you back for some Spirit Calming Tea."

I wrapped my arms around his waist, buried my head in his arms, sucked in his warmth, sucked in his scent, then rose and bit him hard on the shoulder.

It wasn't a fake bite, but it really made my teeth go numb.

He was in pain. I remember him letting go of me and shouting, "Yun Zhiqiu."

And I fell to the ground, my body was in pain from the fall, the feeling was very good, my mouth was full of the taste of blood.

The chaotic sounds drowned me out. When it quieted down, I was already at the Moon Viewing Hall.

He shut his mouth and didn't say anything, neither did he think nor did he care. For some reason, his aunt came in with something to advise me, "Empress, at least eat some congee. Your body is more important."

I didn't say anything. I turned my head to look at the embroidered butterfly on the bedclothes. There were layers of gauze wrapped around my hands, and finally I knew what kind of pain it was.

The reason for this was to cry in a low voice, "Empress, please do not puke on your own body. The young prince still needs the Empress's care, so no matter what she's angry at, the Empress should not be angry at herself.

Anger flared in me, and I turned my head and glared at her.

Her eyes red, she said with tears in her eyes, "Empress, I beg of you to eat some. No matter how angry you are, you have to take care of your body. Just eat a little, okay?"

I let out a long, lingering sigh and heard the sound of someone crying again.

He had only just raised his hand when he hurried over to help me up. "Empress, slow down."

After drinking some water and dragging his heavy body to see if he was in a bad mood, he could feel it too. He cried miserably.

She took him out of the nurse's arms and patted him gently. Jiji, don't cry anymore.

He had been watching the imperial physician for several days now, and his entire body was struggling.

He was a little hot, and his clothes were slightly wet. I had him washed and dressed in clean little clothes, and I carried him to my room, which was a little drafty and still in the little cradle, where the sleeping ball jumped up to the table and looked at him with its round, bright cat eyes, and shook him slowly, and blew on the quiet air. He slowly quieted down.

He fell asleep, so did the cat. The palace was quiet at last, but his heart was too cold in the extreme heat of the day.

I carefully took care of the Jiji, because the little prince was sick, let me get a profit, take a leave of absence do not have to go every morning to bid farewell.

On the other hand, Lu Yao chose a time to come over and look at me. When he saw that I was blaming him, he glared furiously at me and said, "Look in the mirror and see what you look like now."

"I'm fine." I said flatly.

She shook my shoulder. It doesn't matter what happens, why don't you take good care of yourself. You are doing this to your own body, aren't you proud of yourself?

"Luyao, nothing happened." I smiled.

Her eyes reddened. "You're still saying that you're fine? Who would believe that! Yun Zhiqiu, I'm Lu Yao, your sister! Don't tell me that if you hurt yourself like this, I won't feel any heartache?"

"Luyao." I was so angry that I wanted to cry.

She hugged me. "Good little sister, don't cry. If you have anything to say to big sister about your grievances, tell me. Is it worth it for you to be so hateful and not eat?"

"Not worth it." It really wasn't worth it.

I shook my head vigorously. Luyao took out dishes from the food box and carried them to a bowl for me. "Eat them all."

It was so hard to eat, but slowly, she chewed and swallowed it.

"Zhiqiu, why don't you tell me why I didn't give you some peaceful days? "You already have nothing to ask for, and you're already very happy. For some things, is it better that you don't know?"

"No, I would rather know than believe in cruel dreams. Luyao, thank you. I will get better, but I hate him. Don't come and try to persuade me. I can't let go of this hatred."

Lu Yao lightly said, "Zhi Qiu, he lied to you, but he shouldn't hurt you. He loves you so much, so don't think too badly of him. Thinking back then, he also thought that there was nothing he could do with you, so he said you were pregnant, and it also happened by chance.

I laughed, "Luyao, have I really been so naive? Ever since he said I was pregnant, he had been planning on how to pamper me, how to make me shine in the harem. He knew that Li Fei was too arrogant and straightforward, and he did it on purpose, that woman didn't kill me, but stabbed me in the stomach instead, you never knew what kind of fear I was in, I would rather have cut off my face, cut off my arms and legs, but I also don't want to be desperate like that back then. He made people act really well, even the imperial guards and officials were injured, but Lu Yao, what did you tell me to be lenient with, can I really take everything back? If I could choose, I would rather not have met him. "

These words were cold yet firm. Give me a chance to choose, and I will make a wrong move when we meet.

Luyao hugged me tightly, as if trying to warm me up. "Don't be afraid, it's over."

"Luyao, don't say anything else. I know you're very considerate towards me in front of the empress dowager, but right now, I don't care about that at all. You can punish me however she wants to punish me."

I bit the emperor, and many people were watching, and Her Majesty probably knew as well. The emperor didn't dare to say anything, but the empress dowager wasn't very kind to me either.

"Just that small matter? If I couldn't take it, then I wouldn't be worthy to be your big sister. I really don't understand how the empress dowager's aunt looked down on people. They're all of different grades and ranks.