Chapter 521 – Events to Nomination 9 – Clean-up is hard

Chapter 521 – Events to Nomination 9 – Clean-up is hard

John was ripped out of his sleep by the sound of fists banging on his door. Well, that was not quite accurate. The banging just caused him to get that slight bit aware that he was awake, the state where he could either wake up by moving his heavy limbs or just ignore any impulse whatsoever and seamlessly drift back into sleep.

So, what ripped him out of his sleep instead was the wrath of his weaponized maid directed at whoever was drumming at the door and didn’t stop. It felt like something he shouldn’t ignore, unless he wanted to wake up to the sight of Aclysia mopping up some suspiciously red liquid. Immediately, he was faced with the idea that dealing with the aftermath of her murdering someone would be less of a headache than his hangover.

Images flashed up in his head. The cantina, then the toilet, the contents of his stomach, then more alcohol. ‘Why did you do that?!’ he scolded his past self. ‘Why the hell would you keep drinking after throwing up?’ There were some other broken pieces of imagery all of which included naked females and some sort of liquor or beer. ‘Why do I even keep running into alcohol like this? I hate hangovers, yet I somehow drink again after some time!’

As he heaved himself out of bed, a window informed him of his predicament in greater detail.



He just mentally mailed the list to Beatrice, whose upper body suddenly shot out of a pile of cushions behind him. Completely robotically, as if a mechanism had suddenly catapulted her back upwards to make her display a perfect 90-degree angle between torso and legs. “Acknowledged: will fetch these things. Question: will efficient intake suffice?”

With an almost broken voice, John answered, “Yes... I will just throw it into my mouth...” He absolutely had no appetite, so whatever great meal Aclysia could have made out of the stuff he needed, right now he just wanted this headache and nausea to disappear. Even if that meant drinking one of Beatrice’s sludge meals.

Anyway, that wasn’t the only window he got. A whole bunch of shit that his eyes strained to read and his brain needed multiple attempts to decipher was laid down in front of him. At least his bedroom was comfortable, even though there were about five times more cushions around than before, many of which were torn.









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“What the fuck did I do last night?” he groaned as more figments of memory came back to him like a bunch of puzzle pieces. He already had the frame completed, but all of these flashes still had to be put in the right order. At least there was solace in the fact that there was no ‘you sucked your first dick’ achievement, so nothing gay had happened while his inhibitions had been lowered.

Another random memory flared up: him trying to pick a perk for Lover Boy but being unable to read the swirling letters, followed by him deciding to press a button at random, but his legs suddenly decided they wanted to move backwards. Then his back on a mattress, the window closing, and a drunk Gnome jumping on his dick, throwing stuttering pornstar lines around like the most reluctant but clearly horny slut on the planet.

That was a memory he wanted to spend more time dissecting, but he heard continued arguing from the door that connected his captain’s apartment to the outside. Aclysia’s voice was controlled, for now. Annoyance was clearly rising through their mental connection. He managed to put his clothes on through sluggish movements in his menu, then move out of bed with a similarly low level of vigour, stepping around the gooey puddle on the floor that was a completely deformed Undine.

“What is going on?” he asked as he blinked against the uncomfortably bright daylight. Suddenly he found himself missing winter. “Who is making a fuss?” he scratched his head and yawned loud and wide, showing all of his teeth to anyone around.

“President Newman,” a respectful but somewhat afraid voice reached him to the sound of heels clacking together. “Lieutenant Klum of the Little Maryland army estate, pardon the intrusion!”

Upon hearing that, John tried his best to not look hungover, or at least not like an addicted hobo that had found an oddly fitting and clean suit in the dumpster. Standing straight, however, caused his stomach to rumble, and he let out a very unprofessional burp. “Excuse me,” he stated, raising a hand to his mouth as rancid air escaped his stomach and he had to fight against the acid travelling along side it. “Could you come back in like... three hours?”

He needed to throw whatever Beatrice would bring him into his system, take a long shower and brush his teeth for like ten minutes. His body felt sticky all over – it was highly likely his abs had been used as a delivery system for alcohol – and his teeth weren’t just covered in plaque, they felt like they had entirely become it.

“Up already? Well, come on in!”

The Gamer had expected her to either sound almost dead or tell him to wait, but since this was how it was, he wouldn’t say no. Gripping the handle, he pushed to door open and was greeted by the smell of vanilla soap and the sight of the shortstack general soaking in the bathtub. “I could return that ‘up already?’ bit,” he said as he walked up to her.

“Mhm, I think you already guessed I am part water elemental,” she mused and he nodded. “I had the wisdom to fall asleep in this tub, so I only had to put on the water when I woke up. Been recovering since. How did you get better so quick? With what you drank, I was actually half-expecting you to die.”

“Bullshit Gamer powers,” John explained, seeing no harm in sharing that little information. “I got a window that told me what nutrients my body was missing, just needed to get them back into my system... All of that aside,” he got to the actual thing, incredible thankful that at least one of the generals was looking well, “your subordinates think I have trapped and or murdered you and are currently threatening me with sending message to Washington putting our countries at war if I don’t open the Harbour.”

“Oh, right, those are around,” Imerella gave him a carefree smile and stood up. She had no shame about showing her curvy body, so John had none ogling it either. Not like he hadn’t seen it extensively the past night anyway. “Well, I would like to keep bathing a bit longer, but I guess this is more important... You wouldn’t happen to know where my uniform was left, would you?”

“One moment,” he transferred the question Aclysia, who told him it was in her inventory. She quickly excused herself from the soldiers, which must have looked really suspicious. “It will arrive here shortly,” he told Imerella, who dropped back into the bathtub.

“Well, I can be here a bit longer then... thank you.”

“Thank me for what?” John was confused. “All I did was play along to my girlfriend pulling off a crazy stunt.”

“Thank her then,” the country looking girl laughed and kicked some water into the air. “I have been trying to get Terkal to see more than his superior in me for ages. This was rather effective.” That was one way to put the combination of raw forwardness and alcohol. “You have no idea how hard it is to date when you are over a century old and famous. Even the guys in their thirties think you are some untouchable legend.”

“I don’t know, he looked rather forward about everything,” John pointed out; the tall general had been pretty vocal about wanting the whole making out to happen.

“I have been whining to him that I wanted to fool around with some girls for years now in the hopes he would find that attractive, guess he got the wrong message...” she sighed like only a person that couldn’t give up on someone that annoyed them could, “...he is pretty dense sometimes.”

“The titfuck definitely did it though,” John pointed out.

“That and him whipping my ass for ten minutes. Thanks for THAT by the way, you gave very good instructions,” she winked, “haven’t been abused like that in years.”

‘Guess I can’t ‘awaken’ an already self-aware masochist,’ John realized as he made a final check mark on the sensemaking behind his quest. “I don’t remember that part,” he admitted. “I hope that he doesn’t get embarrassed and acts like this whole thing never happened, then.”

“Don’t jinx it,” Imerella warningly raised a finger out of the water, then dropped deeper into the tub. “But yeah, let’s hope that.”

“If it doesn’t work out, there is always room in my bed,” John half-joked. He wasn’t quite into girls this thick, physically speaking, but attractive was attractive. Imerella had a cute face and a massive, smooth ass combined with an attitude that seemed happy-go-lucky. He wasn’t actively looking to expand his harem, but if she wanted in, his dick certainly would be happy about it.

She chuckled again, but shook her head. “Not a girl for a harem policy of your kind. I want either complete swinging or just my man and he has just me. Yesterday was fun, but nothing long-term.” She gave him a more serious look, “And I can’t even consider it until the current situation gets resolved. For a quick romp every now and again, as long as I am single, I will think about it.”

“I can respect that,” the Gamer said and then heard his weaponized maid approach. “I will give you the room to change,” he said when she began piling the general’s clothes on a stool. The bathroom was more than big enough for three people to move around, but it was a symbolic thing.

Yesterday had brought up the question how the harem would handle girls that were just visiting John’s bed, so to say. Although he hadn’t quite figured everything out yet in that regard, it seemed very context dependant. He was at least clear on not sticking it into girls that were chasing another guy. He hadn’t yet fucked Imerella and he didn’t plan to flirt around anymore than he already had.

Imerella waved after him. “If I get fed up with trying, I will definitely consider it,” she said, “‘cause holy moley, I want to try the dick where that semen came from!”



John stepped out and Aclysia closed the door behind him.