Chapter 189 - A Strategy For Revival

When a chuckle reached my throat, I realised what had happened.

The secret technique to reach a woman's heart wasn't working at all. It was something else that made Thea undress.

First of all, she didn't do it willingly. She was simply following an order I didn't give.

There was a cloak on a chair, I had left it there before going out, but I hadn't worn it. It was clean and usable.

I grabbed it, wrapped Thea, and pulled her towards the table.

«This is not what I meant,» I explained.

She stared at me with a pout. It was better to just change the topic.

«Are you hungry?»

«Am I not to the Duke's taste?»

Ah, it seemed that I couldn't just bypass that conversation.

«I just wanted you to be more comfortable, without that heavy mantle. I have to admit that my choice of words could have been better,» I said.

I poured a glass of water. I offered it to Thea and waited for her to drink. I'd have stepped away instead of staring from so close if only I had the strength to do so.

When she choked, in part because of my intruding presence, I rubbed her back. I whispered a few comforting words, hoping it would help her calm down and relax. At least enough to let her drink without choking.

She glanced at me, and then she looked at her fingers holding the glass.

«I'm not hungry, but I'd like to take a bath.»

Oh, I had already predicted it! My wife liked bathing very much.

Before letting her rest from the long day, I had to remind her that it was a dangerous place. Again, I had the same question: cold and unreachable or gentle and smiling?

«The maids will bring you hot water in a while. Let's talk about the rules first. If you don't know how to behave, I can hire a teacher for you. The court etiquette is complicated, and you should get used to it sooner than later.»

Cold was easier. And Thea would have adapted to my behaviour with ease. She liked challenges, so she would have seen me as one.

«I know how to behave,» she replied, in fact, and I observed her from the couch. Somehow, I had found the strength to move away.

Sleeping in the same bed with her without tightly hugging her would have been a real trial.

When the maids knocked, I got up to open the door. I had instructed all servants to knock and wait instead of barging in like their usual. I didn't want them to startle my wife.

They left in silence after filling a tub with hot water.

Instead of walking to the bath, Thea observed me with her wary expression. She was nestled under the mantle, on alert.

I thought it was clear enough already. I wouldn't have assaulted her.

«Do you need help to take a bath?» I asked, trying to suppress the grin on my lips.

Memories of our baths together back in Polis clouded my mind. Yet, my wife would have been scared by my expression. I had to keep control and look cold.

«No, I don't,» she muttered, fast and wary. Indeed, she had always hated being touched by strangers.

«Good, then I won't call the maids back,» I reassured her.

Too bad that there wasn't any trace of relief on her face.

«You've already shown me all there's to be seen,» I reminded her.

Not that she showed me, but I had also caressed and kissed every part of her body. I knew by heart every little mole on her skin, every curve, and every sensitive spot.

«The water will get cold if you wait longer,» I added before those images could cause any weird grimace to appear on my lips once again. My wife was already frightened enough.

There wasn't any need to show too much interest.

While she walked towards the tub and soaked in, I opened a random book on a random page and stared at the words as if I was reading.

Thea was just a few steps from me, attracting all my attention without doing anything. I didn't have any hope to read a single word. Yet, it would have been impolite to stare at her for the whole time.

I didn't even dare to glance, for I didn't want her to think I was hurrying her.

A small lantern made the letters readable, but my eyes couldn't stay on a single one enough time to decode it.

I hadn't ever considered that part of my plan, so I was hit by it. I wanted to woo my wife until convincing her to marry me and have a son, but I hadn't realised that her presence would have been enough to make me lose my mind.

I wanted to kiss her, to hug and comfort her. I desired to whisper reassuring words to her ear while accompanying her into slumber. I yearned to eat together, sitting on a tight couch and feeding each other. I craved to hear her voice while she spoke about her days...

I couldn't have all of that at the moment. I had to settle for having Thea by my side as a stranger.

I couldn't even look at her as much as I desired.

I had been a fool. Thinking that I could actually pull it off by acting cold, detached, and foreign?

I had to spend the rest of my life hiding my past memories from her, my crazy plan, and the fact that I already knew her as much as a man could know a woman.

At least, seeing Elias seemed a step closer than before. I just needed to convince Thea to have children before it was too late.

It was not that bad, right?

We were in a forced marriage the first time too. I just had to pay attention to repeat our interactions until my wife accepted me like she did the first time.