CH 20

Chapter Twenty,

The face of young Sir Chang that year still carrying some baby fat and the lean, thin, and frail face in front of him at this time overlapped together. Xiao Zuo seemed like he returned to ten years ago, where the splendours of spring were just right, and they were sitting in the classroom. The sunlight would pass by the rustling bamboo windows and fall onto the tables, gathering into a warm and mottled print.

Xiao Zuo fixed his gaze, he lowered his eyes and looked at Chang Fu Run, and met with that pair of eyes still as clear as Qing Ling’s streams- even if it was a person any colder, they would have no way of saying a word of denial at this moment, especially when Xiao Zuo was originally of a soft-hearted nature. His heart pretty much was about to get squeezed from this decaying atmosphere, trickling with remorse and sorrow.

“A’Run, I promise you, I……” Xiao Zuo took a deep breath in, he shook his lips, and his voice got softer and softer, “I…… will do all that I can.”

Chang Fu Run gripped his hand, his eyes held in the remaining vitality from the sliver of warmth after a piece of wood had been burned to its end, and said to Xiao Zuo word by word, “This subject, awaits your Majesty.”

Saying this, Chang Fu Run started coughing again, and that viscous blood flowed onto the blankets along the gaps of his fingers. He heavily gasped twice, leaned on the cushion like all his power had been exhausted, and squeezed out a smile like he had been lifted of a heavy burden at Xiao Zuo, then peacefully closed his eyes.

“Fu Run!” Xiao Zuo blankly looked at the hand he was holding hang down. The oil lantern on the table let out a very, very light sputter, and the outside of the window seemed to be falling with rain.

Zi Wan went out at some time ago, Xiao Zuo silently leaned on the post of the bed, and turned his head in to listen to the rain drops dripping from the house eaves. In this brief instant, he seemed to have recalled many things.

He recalled that the first time he met Chang Fu Run, it was also in this kind of rainy night in winter. Chang Fu Run’s body hadn’t been well since he was young, so the family wrapped him with a thick fox coat, and that circle of white fur made his small little face seem like a porcelain doll carved from powder and jade.

Nan Liang’s winters had a lot of rain with seldom clear days- after the two had gotten familiar, Chang Fu Run would often enter the palace during the winter, the room would warmly be burning with charcoal, and they would lay on the bed with a blanket for each person, only lighting up a flickering candle, listening to the pitter pattering night rain outside, and talking about some current things they felt were funny, some related to the future, some related to growing up.

Just like how there was an unceasing night rain coming down today, sometimes, fate would be like a cycle, there might be some things ending, and there would also be new births.

When Zi Wan pushed the door to come in, her gaze fell to the side of the bed. Xiao Zuo had his eyes closed, like he was terribly exhausted after fighting a hard battle, he took a while, then said to Zi Wan, “Let’s have Fu Run sent out the city and buried a bit later.”

In the night, Xiao Zuo told this matter to De Qing, and the two secretly called a carriage, sent Chang Fu Run out the city, and asked a nearby farmer and found a place in the shadows of the mountain, and even called a few farmers to help bury him. Once Xiao Zuo paid some silvers, he hung his head down and looked at that barren gravestone. It was said to be a gravestone, but it was merely just a plaque of wood, with the surface plainly engraved with a few words.

Today, dark clouds covered over the moon. All over the skies was a boundless thick and dense colour of the night, even the stars were all concealed. Xiao Zuo held up an umbrella and stood in front of that wooden plaque for a while, tidied up the shattered heart, lightly sighed, and returned to the residence with De Qing.

“Duke, the matter of Sir Chang today……” The two got soaked in a bit of rain outside, so Zi Wan made some ginger soup in the kitchen and carried it over. De Qing picked up a bowl, lifted his head to look at Xiao Zuo, “What does the duke plan on doing?”

Xiao Zuo sipped on the ginger soup with small mouthfuls. When he heard this, he was still silent, and after a very long time, he then said hoarsely, “What…… can I possibly plan on doing now?” He paused, “I will go see his Highness tomorrow, his Highness…… is opposed with the Liu family…… perhaps…… perhaps……”

He drank the soup in the bowl all in one gulp, Zi Wan handed a handkerchief over to him, he wiped his mouth, then turned over and looked outside the window, “This is the only method I have.”

During the night, Xiao Zuo had a dream again. In the dream, he was a free infant swallow, passing by rustling ripe willows in Nan Liang’s springs, the winds were fine, blocking the storms and rain for him, and also forming a sweet nest for him.

He originally was not that eagle soaring above the highest skies, he should be born in that flower-filled, warm and wealthy home, being a carefree swallow, holding a branch of flowers of February. But this hateful fate flipped over his gentle nest, broke apart his wings, and shut him in this cold cage, insisting he smash at it until his head broke and blood flowed.

The rains outside came down even heavier.

❀

“Duke, Duke!” Just as Xiao Zuo got down from the carriage, he met with a few servants from the crown prince residence. Once they saw Xiao Zuo, they hurriedly ran over, “Why has the duke not come to the residence yesterday? His Highness the Crown Prince faulted this servant for not doing his utmost, if the duke is free, please immediately come with this servant.”

“Right now?” Xiao Zuo froze for an instant, he seemed to be a bit hesitant, and asked probingly, “It is a bit late right now, would it bother his Highness’ rest?”

“Not at all, not at all.” That person shook his head, “His Highness especially instructed that if we met with the duke, to invite the duke to the residence.”

Seeing that it would be rude to reject anymore, Xiao Zuo accepted it in the end. He did not even go inside the residence, and had De Qing go back to rest, while he himself boarded the sedan chair the crown prince residence carried over, “Then I’ll be troubling you.”

Those few sedan bearers walked extremely steadily, while the two sides of the sedan chair were hung with thick curtains blocking the wind, with the surface printed with plain-coloured flower patterns. Xiao Zuo wrapped himself in a fur coat and leaned on the cushion, pondering when he sees He Xuan in a bit, how he should open about the matter of Nan Liang.

He hazily napped for a while in the sedan chair, and felt the sedan stop, then a servant lifted the curtains and called to him, “Duke, we have arrived at the crown prince residence.”

Xiao Zuo nodded his head, and came down from the sedan. When he unsuspectingly went out from inside the sedan, he froze from the outside’s whistling cold winds, and slightly unbearably shuddered a bit. The servants on the two sides saw this, then hurriedly led him into the study.

He Xuan was currently leaning on the back of a chair resting, with his hands holding up a cup of tea. Seeing [Xiao Zuo] come in, he then waved his hand and had those few servants all withdraw, propped his chin, with his expression all nonchalantly, and lifted his eyelids to look at him, “Didn’t they say to come over yesterday? Why has there been a delay?”

Xiao Zuo originally wanted to speak to him about this, and seeing how he asked, he then answered, “I was held up by a matter, and was unable to come.”

“Oh?” He Xuan lifted his eyebrows. The inside of the study right now only remained with the two, so He Xuan personally poured a cup of tea for him, and asked with some slight interest, “Speak about it.”

“Thank you, your Highness.” Xiao Zuo took the cup, blew on the tea leaves surfaced on the top, and he took a deep breath in, and steadied his gaze, “In the morning, I met with a friend from Nan Liang, he…… he was already seriously ill, how much hardship he must have faced when escaping from Nan Liang.”

Xiao Zuo paused, and secretly peeked at He Xuan. When he saw his expression did not change, he then continued on, “Before he died, he spoke of how the current Nan Liang garrison envoy indulges the Jin army to kill and rob, with no evil they wouldn’t do…… I…… I would like to ask your Highness……”

“Ask me?” He Xuan’s face was calm, but the originally crow-black eyes that were like a deep pool looked towards him. Xiao Zuo pursed his lips, and got a bit anxious inside, “Ask your Highness during next time’s court meeting, if you could…… could speak about this with his Majesty, and have his Majesty……”

“Xiao Zuo.” He Xuan interrupted him impatiently, “The garrison envoy and Ig are both Jin people, why should Ig help you?”

He Xuan slightly lifted his chin. From Xiao Zuo’s perspective, he could only see his icy, statue-like cold profile. He immediately stiffened up, “Isn’t your Highness and the Liu family typically on bad terms……”

“Typically on bad terms?”He Xuan sneered hearing this. He slightly lowered his head to look at Xiao Zuo, and said each word clearly, “Empress Liu is also mygu mother, no matter how much more worse terms Ig am with the Liu family, it is much better than with the outsiders of Nan Liang. Do tell, why should Ig help outsiders, and speak badly of mygu own family?”

He Xuan’s fierce aura was truthfully too overbearing, at this time, the two both stood by the wall, Xiao Zuo unnaturally took a step back, and the back tightly stuck to the slightly cold wall.

He Xuan then, like he was taking a mile for an inch, went forward and continued attacking the castle- he used a hand to prop to the side of Xiao Zuo’s ear, and firmly trapped the Xiao Zuo who had no place to run into his own arms.

The tea placed on the table was forgotten by the two already. Xiao Zuo’s straight back stiffly tightened up, he did not dare to look at He Xuan’s eyes, and only turned his head and vacantly looked at that turning and floating tea leaf. After a while, he then dryly spoke, “But…… but Nan Liang’s commoners are now suffering……”

Up to here, Xiao Zuo seemed like he finally caught onto a life-saving straw, he thought to the Lady Meng who gifted him plum embroidery, thought to the Chang Fu Run with a body full of bloodstains who was personally buried by himself, as though these brave souls who were tormented by the suffering invisibly gave him the courage. Once that vengeance burning through blood and life met with wind, it would grow, burning over his heart like sweeping through dry leaves, and he felt a heroism from somewhere to ask for the commoners soar straight to the sky.

Xiao Zuo gripped his hand, and raised his head and met with He Xuan’s gaze, “The Jin army ravages young women, kills the innocent and commoners, running against moral principle, as…… as the crown prince of a country, how could your Highness be so unmoved!”

“Running against moral principle?” He Xuan was completely unmoved, as though the words Xiao Zuo said just now were merely a child’s ignorant words, and even the gaze looking at him bore a bit of ridicule, “Two countries at war, is originally a matter where either you die or I die, whereabouts does one speak of morals? The victorious are king, while the defeated are the bandits, even three year-old children understand that principle, there is no need for megu to teach the duke again, no?”

“So those who lose should deserve to be killed and insulted? It was wrong of me to think that your Highness was a person who emphasized feelings after seeing your Highness save Zi Wan and De Qing, I did not think that you were this cold-blooded too, to help the wicked perpetrate wicked deeds!”

These days, He Xuan typically did not say anything harsh towards him, so this icy-cold look made Xiao Zuo have a kind of feeling like he had returned back to that solitary place just when he came to Jin. He seemed like a young lord who was accustomed to gentle airs, and could not take this hardship that went from being accustomed to luxury to a frugal life, while those words carried a kind of rashness, rushing out defencelessly.