Chapter 5: Honey, guns cost money

Chapter 5: Honey, guns cost money

James yanked on the cargo pants Serenity had left in a pile by the bathroom door, and still soaked ran into the living room.

Serenity was yanking open drawers in the TV stand, and pulled out a compact, dark gray pistol. With quick efficiency she ejected the magazine, slammed it back home, and then looked to James, eyes wide. What do we do?

In response he ran to the front door, caught himself, then looked around for a weapon. There was nothing good, so he snatched up the heaviest iron skillet he could see and then raced down the stairs.

They burst out into the street. Cars were still driving by as if nothing was going on, though drivers were rubbernecking with wide eyes as they passed the laundromat.

Out of which people were streaming, several badly wounded.

James looked in through the huge windows. A half dozen people were trapped in the back corner. He saw three gremlins stalking toward them over the washing machines, their scales gleaming in the electric lights.

Come on! he shouted hoarsely and pushed his way past an elderly man who was emerging to enter the laundromat.

Machines chugged and vibrated. Canned music played over hidden speakers. The linoleum was streaked with blood, a heavy set Hispanic lady lay just inside the doorway with her throat torn out.

Hey! James had no idea as to what he was going. You lot! Over here!

The gremlins paused, looked back over their narrow shoulders at him. Serenity stepped inside, gun held in both hands before her, and fired.

The first shot missed. A hole appeared in the wall. But she fired again, and the bullet hit the center gremlin right in the chest, causing it to stagger back and screech in pain.

It took a second bullet to knock it down.

The other two dove off the machines. James crouched, skillet held in both hands like a baseball bat, gaze flicking at the avenues of approach. Someone was sobbing in the back, while the crowd outside just stood there, watching.

Ive got twelve rounds left, said Serenity, voice weirdly calm. Should be plenty. Stay back and let me -

A gremlin leaped into view, doing that flea jump from the back of a huge machine that came chest high, arms spread, maw open wide. Serenity fired, missed, and the gremlin fell upon James, who swung the black iron skillet like he was going for a home run.

The skillet hit the gremlin full on. It felt like smacking a bag full of sticks. The gremlin was knocked back against the washing machine, bounced off, shook its head and then hissed at him, black blood shining on several contusions and the side of its head.

Serenity fired once, twice, three times. James kept his eye on his gremlin. It ran at him, feinted a leap, then ducked low and scooted under his swing.

Shit! he yelled, back pedaling, but it was too fast.

The gremlin leaped for his face, needle fangs flashing.

James let go of the skillet so that he could bat it away, but as soon as the gremlin touched him a film of gray light appeared all around Jamess body, encasing him an inch above his skin, and the gremlin screeched and leaped off, its hands and knees and shins burning and giving off acrid smoke.

Serenity fired her gun. The gremlins temple shattered, and it fell over to lie still.

Shit, gasped James again, staring at the crumpled body, his shoulders heaving as if hed sprinted a mile. He looked up to Serenity who stood there, eyes wide, glazed, pistol still held before her with two stiff arms. She blinked, scanned the laundromat, kept the gun up.

James straightened, looked over the machines at where the other people were cornered. There any more of them?

Thats I mean - no. A young Hispanic woman stared at him with glassy eyes, her face pale. Mama? Mama! And she ran forward.

One of the others was a heavyset man who had his phone to his ear. They said wed be safe if we didnt answer the question, they said weve be safe!

Yeah, well. James fought the urge to drop his skillet. Welcome to the new world, pal.

Serenity put up her gun, blinked again, and then seemed to wake up. Shit. Wow. I need a drink.

Tell me about it. James resisted the urge to nudge the dead gremlin. Nice shooting.

Thanks. She took her finger off the trigger and lowered the gun to her side. Dated a guy who owned a gun range out in Queens. He thought giving me an unlimited pass would keep me from breaking up with him.

James felt the adrenaline come down, his whole body starting to feel trembly and loose. It work?

Serenity smirked. For a while, yeah.

Come on! The guy with the phone pulled it away from his ear and glared at it. What is this, Detroit? Why the fuck wont 911 pick up?

Mama? The Hispanic woman was slowly kneeling beside the dead lady by the door. Mama?

Shit. James wanted to just walk away. What had gotten into him? Itd been years since hed been triggered to act like that. Had taken years of conscious effort to deaden those instincts. Now he was running around with a cast iron skillet like some god damn hero. He could feel it. A tidal pull. A gravitational suck that threatened to bring him back to life. To make him care again. To get involved.

He didnt want it.

But the sight of the dead gremlin and the womans rising sobs were like hooks in his soul, keeping him from sinking. There were people bleeding outside.

And he knew nobody was coming to help.

Talk to the girl, he told Serenity. Get a sheet to cover her mother.L1tLagoon witnessed the first publication of this chapter on Ñøv€l--B1n.

What is this? yelled the guy in the back. Mexico?!

Wearily he walked out the front door to the sparse crowd. They eyed him, nervous.

Well, on that last one speak for yourself.

Despite himself James smiled. So maybe were overlooking something vital here. Like how that gremlin -

Demon.

- bounced off my aura. Maybe theres a way to get more free points to assign. To level up, like a video game. Become more powerful. Who knows what we could unlock from this bizarro situation?

Serenity narrowed her eyes. And how do we do that?

Wont be by sitting around in here. Only thing that comes to mind is killing gremlins.

We already killed gremlins. Nothing happened.

Maybe killing one or two aint enough. Maybe we have to kill a handful. Maybe ten. I dont know.

And then we get higher ranks, and more points.

Exactly. We can boost our strength, our agility, our Arete. And be that much more ready when Nemesis 2 shows up.

Serenity shrugged. Beats going to Jersey. I just need more ammo.

James suppressed a shiver of excitement, and realized he wanted to go kill those little fuckers. That for the first time since well, since his life fell apart, he had a legitimate way to vent his fury. And hed be saving other people in the process without having to work as an EMT.

Win-win.

Im going to need a gun.

Honey, guns cost money. Youll have to settle for your skillet for now. Its a good look for you. Really.

Ha ha. Well. Shall we?

Now?

Why not?

Why not indeed. I was going to suggest stopping by Hermans for a drink, but sure. Lets get some ammo. And kill some demons while were at it.

James nodded and sat to pull on his boots. Serenity pulled out her phone while she waited, then let out a low whistle. Youve gone viral!

Viral?

That video from last night. Over eight million views. Twelve thousand comments. Wow.

Twelve thousand comments? James tensed up. Do I - should I start answering them, or?

Oh, youre trending as hashtag sexylumberhomelessjack.

I dont know what that means.

Serenity rolled her eyes. It means, cave man, that in another life youd be starting a new career. But seeing as its the demon apocalypse, too late.

Well. James stood up, feeling awkward and stiff. Sexylumberhomelessjack? Thats, ah, good. Im glad we got the word out.

Serenity laughed, some of her old confidence returning. Oh, you are too darling. How come no homeless babe hasnt snapped you up already?

James stared at her, then looked away.

Oh. Serenitys humor fled. Sorry.

No worries. He coughed into his fist, forced the pain away. It was a dull ache. Getting ornery these days was more a trained reflex than anything else. Lets get that ammo.

The sporting goods store is only four stops away. Serenity put her pistol in her purse. It barely fit. Grabbed her thick coat, then stared at him. Youre going to freeze.

Your ex leave a jacket?

No. But the only thing I have your size is perfect. Wait here.

She darted into her bedroom, and a moment later emerged with a caramel brown furred pimp coat.

Youre serious.

Try it on! Look, its warm. And you know what they say: sexy lumberhomelessjacks cant be choosers.

James took the full-length coat gingerly. The fur was cheap imitation, but the inner lining was in good condition. With great reluctance he pulled the coat on. It was tight across the shoulders, the sleeves were an inch too short, but otherwise it fit.

Fucking awesome, said Serenity, her tone deadpan. Ive died and gone to heaven. Can we post a video of you giving battle tips with the skillet?

James laughed helplessly and strode past her. Come on. Its time to go kill some shit.