CH 144

There were three individuals peeking at Siegfried and Brunhilde.

To be exact, there were two humans and an animal.

An hour ago, Ingrid was going around the fort looking for Siegfried when she ran into Hamchi, and she asked him about the whereabouts of the man she ‘desperately wanted to eat’.

“So, you want to know where my owner punk is? Kyu?” Hamchi asked.

“Yes.”

“I only take advance payments.”

“Advance payments…?”

“The world revolves around give and take. If you want to get something, then don’t you think you have to give something? Kyu!”

“I see… What do you want?”

“Hamchi loves sunflower seeds! How many packets can you give me?”

“Ten packets?”

“Top that up with five more.”

“Sure.”

“Follow me. I will show you where my owner punk is. Oh, if you top it up by five more packets, then I will tell you that guy’s fetishes.”

“Fetishes…?”

“This is a secret, but he has a thing for ropes…”

“Ropes?!”

“Ropes are...”

In exchange for twenty sunflower seed packets, Hamchi ratted out Siegfried’s whereabouts and the story behind the Rope of Shame. Of course, he conveniently excluded the story about how Siegfried was also a victim.

However, Hamchi and Ingrid weren’t the only ones looking for Siegfried…

‘I have to do my best while His Majesty is still in the territory!’

Actually, Gringore had spotted Siegfried much earlier than Hamchi and Ingrid.

His Majesty is a strong drinker.

He continued drinking without showing any signs of being intoxicated even after the Nordic King, Lionbreath, had already passed out from drinking.

- Records of the Proatine Kingdom Book 1 Chapter 3

Siegfried van Proa the 1st – Interesting Facts About the King Part 1

Gringore was burning with the resolve to write down every single thing as long as it was related to Siegfried, and he ended up witnessing the historical scene of his king and the elven princess locking lips in the darkness.

It was late at night…

His Majesty made love with an elven princess and the Captain of the Pegasus Flying Squadron, Brunhilde, out on the plains under the cover of the darkness.

- Records of the Proatine Kingdom Book 1 Chapter 4

Siegfried van Proa the 1st – The King’s Love

It went without saying that he also recorded Siegfried and Brunhilde’s kissing scene.

‘Ah! His Majesty is actually a bad boy! To think that he would cast away the Nordic Princess to make love with the Elven Princess!’ Gringore was in awe as a sleazy smile flashed across his face.

“Hey!” someone’s voice cut across the darkness. “SIEGFRIED YOU SCUMBAAAG!”

***

‘N-No…! My… first kiss was in a game! Nooo…!’ 

Siegfried’s face turned bright red. Brunhilde had just stolen his lips.

Yes…

The gamer, Han Tae-Sung, was single since birth, and he had never kissed a girl until now. He was what people would call on the internet a ‘single virgin’[1].

However, he had never imagined—even in his wildest wet dreams—that he would end up having his first kiss in a game.

‘Ah, I know I’m a gaming addict, but… this is wrong… why did I have my first kiss with a game character…?’ Siegfried couldn’t enjoy the sensation of Brunhilde’s lips against his and her warm tongue squirming in his mouth.

Siegfried struggled to break free from her after he was overcome with the shame of kissing a game character when he had never even kissed a woman in real life.

They kissed for quite a while before Brunhilde recovered her senses and jumped back in surprise with her face flushed red. She bowed apologetically to Siegfried and stammered, “I-I’m sorry! I-I got so overwhelmed that I made a mistake…”

“…”

“I’m really sorry! I have done something unforgivable! Please forgive me…!” Brunhilde fervently apologized to him without stopping, “I must be irredeemable… to think that I would kiss a human for my first time…”

”This is a very shameful thing for us elves…! What right do I have to do that when I’m just an ugly elf?!”

“I-It’s alright…” Siegfried tried his best to comfort the elf while he was still wallowing in his self-pity.

‘This woman is pretty hard on herself. Just how difficult has her life been…?’ he wondered while feeling a sense of kinship to her, even though she was an NPC. Of course, it was because she managed to remain single since birth for over 369 years.

“Don’t mind what happened,” Siegfried said.

“How can I not mind it…? And you already have a very beautiful lover, too…”

“Ah, you’re mistaken. I’m not in any sort of relationship with that per—”

Siegfried assumed that Brunhilde was talking about Ingrid, so he tried to dispel the misunderstanding.

Unfortunately, it seemed that fate wasn’t going to let him clear up the misunderstanding.

“Hey! SIEGFRIED YOU SCUMBAAAG!”

Siegfried jumped up in surprise and started looking around.

“H-Hiik!”

Then, he found a furious Ingrid stomping toward him, and he almost passed out from shock when he saw Ingrid’s face.

Why?

Ingrid looked like a demon who had slain countless people and was marching toward her next victim.

“I-I will let you two talk. I’m going first!” Brunhilde shrieked and ran away as fast as she could after instinctively sensing the incoming danger.

Thanks to her instincts, Siegfried was now left all alone.

“I-Ingrid! I-It’s not what you think…!”

“Stop… your… filthy… excuses…!”

“Listen to me first…”

“You made me like this… You enslaved my body to desire you, but here you are sucking another bitch’s lips?!”

Another set of messages popped up in front of Siegfried’s eyes.

[Alert: Warning! Warning!]

[Alert: You are advised to run away! Ingrid’s anger toward you has exceeded the maximum threshold!]

The problem was the next set of messages after it.

[Alert: Ingrid’s affinity toward you has increased by 1,000,000!]

[Alert: Ingrid’s affinity toward you has reached ‘Mad Obsession’!]

Ironically, Ingrid’s love for Siegfried didn’t reduce. Instead, it had reached a level that he had never even heard before.

‘I have to run away!’ he kicked off of the ground and ran away as fast as he could.

“Hey! Stop right there!” Ingrid screamed and threw a dagger at him before chasing after him.

[Alert: A poisoned dagger is coming toward you!]

[Alert: The poison is not fatal, but you will be incapacitated and immobilized upon being hit!]

The message motivated Siegfried to run even faster than he had ever done in his entire gaming career. He displayed near-superhuman control as he dodged all of Ingrid’s daggers flying toward him.

The chase lasted for two hours before he finally found a safe place to hide and log out.

“Ugh… What’s with my rotten luck…?”

He could not help but wonder why he had always been consistently hitting obstacle after obstacle throughout his gaming career.

***

At a luxury café near Paldang Dam…

“So… you lost your first kiss to an NPC?” Cheon Woo-Jin asked in disbelief.

“How many times do I have to tell you?” Tae-Sung replied in a gloomy tone and grumbled, “Ah… My first kiss was stolen by an NPC…”

“See? You should’ve just taken my offer and gone on those blind dates. I told you that there’s someone really good.”

“No, thanks. I have to level up,” Tae-Sung shot down the offer.

“That’s why you had your first kiss stolen by an NPC. At this rate, you could lose your first time as well…” Cheon Woo-Jin said with a mischievous smile.

“Keep on talking, and I’ll push you down the dam,” Tae-Sung growled in response.

“Aigoo~ I’m shaking in my boots~”

“You wanna know if I’m serious?”

“N-No…” Cheon Woo-Jin instantly backed down upon sensing that Tae-Sung wasn’t joking at all.

“Hey, you’re starting to attract quite a lot of attention these days.”

“What do you mean by that?”

“I saw a lot of videos about you being uploaded.”

“Ah… There were a lot of Adventurers in the battle… I guess someone took a video and uploaded it,” Tae-Sung said with a nod when he remembered asking Michele to give out quests to hire Adventurers for the battle in exchange for gold.

“It was a low-level fight, so there weren’t that many people who got interested, but there were quite a certain few who watched it.”

“Genesis?”

“Probably, and I think the other top guilds have been watching your videos as well.”

“Damn it… There’s nothing good from sticking out too much. Sigh… I should probably get even stronger and destroy the Genesis Guild as soon as possible. How can I peacefully sleep at night knowing that they could be after me at any moment?”

“I’m sure you’re sleeping without a problem at night.”

“How do you know? Are you peeping on me?”

“The monster wave is one thing, but do you really think that the emperor is going to sit still if Adventurers suddenly invaded one of the kingdoms under his rule?”

His Majesty Emperor.

He was the one who bestowed upon the Proatine Kingdom to Siegfried, and he had promised a protection period of three years, which was the main reason that none of the guilds would definitely dare to invade his kingdom in the interim.

But of course, they could always employ some underhanded tactic similar to the monster wave to inflict damage on him.

Cheon Woo-Jin was right. Tae-Sung was well aware of the protection. It was the primary reason that he wasn’t really worried about his kingdom—for now.

“Still, I should hurry up and take care of them.”

“Then, you should go ahead and level up.”

“You know that, but you’re pushing me to go out on blind dates?”

“Ah, so that’s how it goes?” Cheon Woo-Jin sneered and stared sarcastically at Tae-Sung.

“Hey, Tae-Sung.”

“What?”

“There’s some stench coming from somewhere. Can’t you smell it?”

“What stench?”

“Euk! The stench of a virgin!”

“You’re dead!” Tae-Sung grabbed a nearby plastic bottle and swung it at Cheon Woo-Jin.

“Hey! I was just kidding! A joke! Can’t you take a joke?!”

“Yeah, I’m joking too.”

“Hey! You crazy bastard! Did you get so used to smashing heads in the game that you’re doing it in real life now?! Ack! Somebody help!” Cheon Woo-Jin screamed while trying to protect his head from being smashed open by the enraged virgin.

A quick look at "pawread dot com" will leave you more fulfilled.

***

Tae-Sung rested for as long as he could. Actually, he was only waiting for Ingrid to go back to Fadlan Island before logging into BNW and descending onto the Nürburg Continent as Adventurer Siegfried three days later.

Michele was the first to greet him, “Welcome back, Your Majesty.”

“Where is she?” Siegfried asked almost immediately.

“She has left, so please be at ease.”

“Phew… That’s a relief…” Siegfried finally let out a sigh of relief before asking, “How’s the cleanup going?”

“It is proceeding smoothly, Your Majesty. All you have to do now is to make a decision.”

“What decision?”

“The Renoma Kingdom. What are you going to do about them?”

“Hmm… What should I do?”

“You have two choices. The first one is to invade and put an end to them.”

“A conquest?”

“Yes, we will conquer and absorb them into our kingdom.”

“Our territories are going to expand, and the workload is going to increase, right?”

“Well, yes, that is a given…”

“The second option?”

“We will install a king favorable to us and create a de-facto government.”

“That sounds good.” Siegfried agreed.

“Hmm… We have our public image to handle, so it won’t be wise for us to wage wars right now. I think establishing a puppet government is going to be our best course of action right now. We do have the right to do that, right?”

“An excellent choice, Your Majesty. The Renoma Kingdom is riddled with all sorts of problems, so absorbing them is going to be a loss rather than a profit for us in the short term…” Michele said, ”I also think that we should establish a puppet government and just reap the profits from them.”

“However…” Michele stared at Siegfried.

“…?” Siegfried seemed confused at the sight of that.

“I think Your Majesty is more concerned about the increased workload…”

“Huh~? No way~ Who said that?” Siegfried waved his hand and feigned ignorance before asking, “Do you really think that I’m someone who would make such a choice just to escape working?”

“Yes.”

“…”

“Anyway, I will proceed as you have decided and keep Fitzgerald hostage for now.”

“Sure! Make sure you send him to the coal mines. Let him suffer until he dies.”

“Yes, Your Majesty. Ah! Would you like to take a trip down to the storage?”

“The storage? Why?”

“The Nordic Tribesmen found the Immortal King’s lair while cleaning up their island.”

“So? What does that have to do with me?”

“They found all sorts of treasures and rare items while sweeping through the lair, so they sent a portion of it as gifts for Your Majesty…”

“Is that so?” Siegfried’s eyes sparkled as he inwardly thought, ‘Jackpot!’

The Immortal King was an undead monster, but he had definitely amassed quite a lot of valuable treasures since he was on the brink of becoming a Great Wizard.

“The gifts are stored at the storage, so please go and have a look at them yourself if you wish to check them,” Michele said.

“All right,” Siegfried replied. He then made his way toward the storage.

***

“Wow, these are mine…?” Siegfried muttered in disbelief. He couldn’t hide his surprise while standing in front of his secret storage.

The size of the storage was around three hundred thirty square meters, and it was filled to the brim with all sorts of treasure and gold.

Actually, there was nothing surprising about it.

Siegfried was a king, and a portion of the taxes the Proatine Kingdom had been collecting would always be sent over to his personal royal treasury.

Moreover, the amount that he had extorted from the coalition forces during the Immortal King’s invasion on top of the treasures he had looted from his lair amounted to a massive mountain that filled his storage to the brim.

‘Wow… How much are all of these…? If I add these to what I have in my Inventory, then…’ Siegfried couldn’t even begin to imagine how much money he would earn after selling all of them. ‘I… I’m rich…? I think I can buy a building with this, right?’

It should be more than enough. He should be able to buy an average small-rise building in Gangnam with just a fifth of the gold and treasures here.

Siegfried’s first kiss was stolen by an NPC, but he found solace in the fact that he would now become a building owner, which was considered to be above the creator.[2]

He found solace in it, but it didn’t mean that he could laugh about it…

‘That’s that, but I should either open or sell all of these…’ Siegfried remembered the random boxes that Cheon Woo-Jin had given him. He saw them sitting in his Inventory before he could inspect the treasures here in the storage.

A few seconds later, Siegfried finally made his decision.

“All or nothing.”

He placed down the Autonika Workshop Random Boxes on the storage floor.

Then, he extended his hand toward the first box.

“Tadah!” he exclaimed an onomatopeia as he opened it.

“Lalala~ Lala~ La~ Hum hum hum~ Hum hum~ Hum~ Duru dudu~ dududu~ Hum hum hum~”

All of a sudden, a piece of strange background music could be heard from somewhere.

Siegfried turned toward the source of the sound and found Hamchi lying on top of the mountain of gold and treasures while humming a tune.

“What the hell are you doing over there…?”

“What else? Can’t you tell? Hamchi is spectating! Kyu!”

“…”

“Hurry up and open it! I can’t wait to see what’s going to come out! Well, not that it will matter since all of them will be a bust—Kyu, kyu, kyu!”

“Shut up!”

“Can Hamchi open one?”

“No, these babies have to be opened by my own hand, even if they’re going to be a bust. That’s the right way to open them,” Siegfried shot down the hamster’s request.

“Kyu…” Hamchi cried, looking dejected.

“Anyway, shall we warm up by opening one?”

Siegfried extended his hand toward one of the boxes.

Click… Clack…!

Flash!

The box opened, and a beam of bright green light shot out from the random box.

1. The raw is 모솔아다 which is a social media derogatory term for a virgin male, think ‘virgin loser’? ☜

2. This is a joke in Korea that the building owner has a higher standing than the creator that created the land it’s built on. ☜