Chapter 1086 1086 Backyard Backdrop



Feng

----

Feng sat down on the bench near the pond, before letting out a sigh. Being angry all the time was getting old, even if he felt that anger was justified. *It doesn't help that I'm exhausted. I didn't get to sleep properly in the vault because my mind was too busy, then I was nearly killed, then dragged away by Bing… and now that I have time to rest I can't even allow myself to sleep because this is technically enemy territory. Kat might be putting in a good word for us…

But who am I kidding. She's putting in a good word for Bing and Lian, perhaps Meng and I'll just be the annoying brother they have to take as well. It certainly doesn't help that they all see me as the one in the wrong, or at least, I assume Lian does. Bing at least knows that I have a point… but she just isn't built like me. She can't see Meng as beyond redemption just because she's her mother.* 

Feng let out an, surely manly, yelp of surprise when he felt a par of strong but squishy arms wrap around him. "Naw, is my little boy brooding in the backyard," said a familiar voice. Meng. 

"Let me go!" insisted Feng. 

"Hmm… how about nope?" asked Meng. 

"Weren't you delivering a letter? Why the heck are you here?" asked Feng as he pushed against the hold ineffectually. 

"Bah, now that I don't need to be worried about getting found out I sent of a solid illusion to do that nonsense for me. It's not hard, and I can put a bubble of awareness inside the clone so I can react to things properly. It's basically the same as if I'm there in person, but I can do more important things with my real body, like giving you a hug," insisted Meng. 

"Why are you doing this?" asked Feng with a growl. 

"You're not very specific with that question are you Feng?" said Meng with a grin. "I'm using an illusion to do busywork because my son is brooding and I want to help him, I'm hugging you because I'm a touch-starved spy that gets great joy from forward affection and I'm currently milking it for all it's worth," 

"Why do I not believe you?" asked Feng to the air. 

Meng answered instead of the wind though, "Because I'm also trained in body language reading and basic human psychology so I know that despite your annoyance with me, this is still comforting to you. Embarrassing and annoying maybe, but it makes it very hard for you to keep hating me as I rapidly humanize myself in your eyes," 

"And there it is," said Feng with a sigh. He tried to bring his recent anger back the surface but it wasn't responding to his call. He refused to find this relaxing, just because he was tired, but his anger was denied to him for now. "So… what… you're just going to sit here hugging me and spying on my sister?" 

"Technically sisterS plural, but no, I'm not spying on them at all. Unlike a certain naughty boy I can think of, I trusts them not to stab me in the back while I'm sleeping. Sure I could, they aren't far enough away to be out of hearing range, but I trust them enough to just leave it. I'd probably have done the same for you if you were less antagonistic. I am here for the hugs though," said Meng. 

"Great. So I'm trapped here till you get bored," mumbled Feng. 

"No you're trapped here until it's time to leave. I'm centuries old Feng, I could hug you for at least a year before even the slightest hint of boredom crept in, and even at that point, I'm not entirely certain that I would be bored at all," said Meng. 

Feng grumbled but said nothing in response. The silence stretched for a minute, a comfortable minute for Meng, and an annoying one for Feng. "You know, you can talk to me. About anything really, I'll even promise not to get mad if you decide to go on about how much you hate me," suggested Meng. 

"And why would I do that?" asked Feng. 

"To make yourself more comfortable?" offered Meng as an answer. 

*I hate that she's at least a little bit right. Dammit woman… you are making it really hard to hate you. Jumping on me as soon as I'm too tired to stay angry, and then trying to be supportive and comforting. The fact that Bing believes it's all real just makes it worse. The training probably helps a lot too.*

"I hate you, you know?" said Feng. 

"Of course," said Meng easily. 

"What are you just accepting that?" asked Feng. 

"Two main reasons, the first is that confronting you about any strong belief will only inspire negative feelings so I'm not going to argue against it right now. Punish you later for being stupid and getting Kat injured? Sure, but right now you do need a break, I'll admit that much. The second reason, is that if I'm able to easily accept your opinions you will see me as a person to confide in, and I can use that to restore our relationship. Oh, and I guess there's a third reason, which is that hate is much easier to turn to love when compared with apathy. Now that I've had my own chance to calm down, and now that all my children are safe I can… deal with your own attitude better," said Meng honestly. 

"I wish you weren't so nice to me. It makes it hard to hold onto just how evil I know you to be," said Feng. 

"Ah, but evil is such a subjective thing isn't it? Technically, if I was younger, I wouldn't be held accountable at all for the things I've done because it's just how I was raised. At what age do I suddenly become responsible instead of the organisation behind me Feng?" asked Meng with a grin that Feng couldn't see. 

"See, this is the sort of thing I hate. It's manipulative, and annoying, and god I don't know. Fifty?" answered Feng. 

Meng nodded, "Fifty for cultivators, but no more than twenty for mortals I'd say," 

"So… how long did you know what my issues with you were?" asked Feng. 

"Eh, I made a decent guess. I DID raise you Feng, I don't need to do any extensive research or even pay that much specific attention to guess at your thoughts. I changed your diapers for fucks sake. Did you think there was ever a possibility that I wouldn't be able to work out your train of thought once it got going?" asked Meng. 

Feng blushed a brilliant red and tried a bit harder to get away, to just as little effect. "I… I don't know what to say," 

"Well I'd like to know if it's my apparent moral bankruptcy, my lacking code of ethics, or my disregard for laws, and breaking of said laws, that makes you the most angry?" asked Meng. 

*I'm wising up to this trick.* "Can I just not answer that?" asked Feng, knowing the answer. 

"Of course dear, you can stay silent if you want," said Meng and then she let herself fall into silence. Then she used her illusions to silence everything else sneakily. There was no sound. No birds, no wind, no water, no trees, no servants running around the house nearby. Nothing. No sound was escaping except for their breath. 

Feng cracked after five minutes, "I don't know," Meng gave him a light squeeze as encouragement to continue. "I… I don't know which part bothers me the most. I guess the moral code thing doesn't count, because just not having a moral code doesn't mean you're evil… but I don't know if it's the disregard for laws, or the ethics of the situation. 

"I want to say it's just the laws breaking, that I'm being objective about that… but I guess you taught me a bit too well to stay willingly blind for long. I know that part of it is that I feel like my ethics, that were partially based on your own, which were all lies, no longer hold true. You are not a good person, and I thought you were and maybe I just hate the disconnect that leaves me with, but I don't like it at all," grumbled Feng. 

"I wonder how proud I'm supposed to be that I was so good as a parent that you learned all the lessons I was trying to teach you?" mused Meng to the air. "Especially when the real me considers those lessons to be both incomplete, and actually rather damaging in the real world. Does that make me a bad parent or a good one?" 

"A horrible one," shot Feng indignantly. 

Meng just laughed at Feng's response… and the pout on his face. It was adorable. Best not point that out to him though.