CH 93

Confession

Wilfrecht’s confession continued to confuse Sheila.

When the political upheaval ended, Felix, the Seventh Prince, was six years old. The child of the first prince, who had died before the previous king, couldn’t have been younger than that. In other words, if Felix was 18, there was no way Wilfrecht was 16.

Then, who was the man in front of her?

‘Is he not the child of the former First Prince? No, then there’s no way His Highness’ existence will be officially recognized.’

Wilfrecht’s position was acknowledged by everyone, yet everyone was keeping their mouths shut about the unnaturalness. What was this sense of discomfort? She noticed that there were a lot of contradictions.

“Most of the aristocrats know this, but since no one speaks blindly about it, you must have assumed that I was sixteen years old, just as I appeared on the outside. I didn’t dare deny it even though I knew it was a misunderstanding…. I didn’t want you to think I was creepy.”

Wilfrecht’s voice dropped slightly, and Sheila also braced herself.

“I’m――Wilfrecht von Steitz. I am 20 years old. Originally, I should have already grown up and be in a position of responsibility for my country.”

“…. 20 years old.”

Sheila repeated the same words like an idiot. The rest of the words disappeared into the back of her throat before they could form a definite shape. She herself didn’t know what to say.

It was hard to believe that the slender boy in front of her was 20 years old. There were other people like him, such as Regress, but usually, this was the age when the skeleton was transitioning to that of an adult.

There were also people who remained young despite their age, but in his case, he was anything but young. He was a child. He was clearly not fully grown.

“It’s kind of creepy to look like this and be 20 years old. I already feel out of place among 16-year-olds.”

She didn’t find it creepy in the slightest. That was undoubtedly Sheila’s true feeling. However, she was afraid to say it lightly when she saw the pained smile on Wilfrecht’s face.

Over and over again. Denied and rejected.

Because Sheila could see that he had been hurt in the past like that, she instinctively realized that easy comfort would be useless.

“――It wasn’t long after the political upheaval ended that I noticed something wrong with my body.”

During the coup, Wilfrecht was in poor health. He couldn’t stay awake for long and couldn’t study properly.

The castle’s personal physician diagnosed that it was probably due to mental stress. With his father dead, his grandfather ill, and his relatives fighting amongst themselves, it was not surprising. He had been under a lot of strain from an early age, and he couldn’t afford to let his guard down.

Even after the political upheaval ended, his condition wasn’t good. He kept going back and forth between sleep and wakefulness, and in the blink of an eye, he was 12 years old. He was old enough to enter the Steitz Academy.

However, there was a great deal of anxiety about him entering the academy without any signs of recovery. Wilfrecht decided to postpone admission.

“At the age of 16, my body was finally getting stronger. I could stay awake for more hours, and I was finally admitted. But even then, my body was still small. Because of the stress, my physical growth was significantly delayed.”

Seeing Wilfrecht at the entrance ceremony with other 12-year-olds, his former peers frowned uniformly. Although they didn’t openly show their dislike for him because of his superior position, there was a clear disgust in their eyes.

“Even now, this body is only changing really slowly. While the people around me are growing up, both in mind and body…. I’m the only one stuck.”

Wilfrecht’s fists tightened.

“――That’s why I hate my weakness.”

“Your Highness….”

Sheila remembered that he had said the same thing before. She couldn’t help but watch him in pain.

“I’m weak, and I’ve been afraid all my life. I’m scared I’ll be killed tomorrow. Will my brother, mother, and grandmother be here tomorrow? When will peace come? I was afraid…. I was going crazy every day.”

It was painful to think about Wilfrecht’s feelings. He wasn’t to blame for anything, yet he continued to suffer.

“In the end, only my brother and I survived. But my older brother was strong. He immediately started walking forward. Felix is the same way. He was put in a difficult position, but he remained calm and saw the opportunity, and lived on. How am I in comparison? I’m too pathetic. I’m too weak. My mind is broken, and even my body is affected.”

Wilfrecht’s monologue was like a confession. It was as if Sheila could see his heart painted with remorse.

She was sure he was still stuck in the horror of the political upheaval. But he was struggling to survive desperately.

“… I think I understand somehow why Your Highness is growing medicinal herbs.”

When Sheila said it without any hesitation, Wilfrecht looked up at her curiously after a beat.

The wind was blowing strongly, and Sheila looked up at the sky. The high autumn sky spread above. The wind was cold, but it was a very pleasant autumn day.

Returning a smile to the puzzled Wilfrecht, Sheila grabbed his hand. He shivered slightly but didn’t resist.

Despite his status as a prince, Wilfrecht’s hands were covered with gloves, covered in mud. Sheila’s smile deepened more and more.

“Your Highness is trying to become stronger together. By protecting and nurturing the medicinal herbs with your own hands, you’re slowly healing your wounds.”

“…. Eh….?”

Sheila looked straight back into his blue eyes and smiled softly.

“I think it’s amazing that you are willing to put in the effort to keep going even when you are afraid. ――Your Highness is very strong.”

It was more difficult to experience setbacks and suffering and grew from them than to be strong from the beginning. And those who understood those suffering could understand the pain of others as much because they had suffered. Sheila liked such people much more.

Wilfrecht’s eyes widened at the smile that was as clear as the sky.

The autumn scenery, which he thought was chilly, seemed to be repainted vividly in an instant. Sheila’s warmth transmitted through his gloves, and her words seemed to melt away the cold parts of his heart.

There had been people who had spoken kind words to him before. However, it just didn’t resonate with him. He was depressed, even blaming it on the fact that his own soul was dirty.

For the first time, he felt like he could be accepted because of Sheila’s words, who lived honestly without any hesitation. For the first time, he felt forgiven.

He wondered how splendidly Sheila lived her life. To Wilfrecht, the gentle, warm world reflected in her eyes seemed so precious. It was irreplaceable.

He turned his head down to hide the tears that were about to slip off on their own and clasped his hands back together. He clasped their hands tightly as if to hold them together.

“… For me, being called ‘Your Highness’ was a terrible burden.”

For the weak Wilfrecht, being royalty was a burden. It was a title that must always be special. Every time he was called, he felt a little suffocated.

It was as if he was sinking into a dark swamp. There was no escape, and the stagnation accumulated like lees.

Both his mind and body were too fragile to survive without the help of those around him. Whenever he was called “Your Highness,” he was reminded of the heavy responsibility that he had abandoned, and he felt nothing but bitterness. Instead of being prepared to face it, he desperately wanted to escape.

“It was only you. You were the only one I didn’t feel the burden of being called ‘Your Highness’.”

Sheila was the only one. She called him as easily as calling a friend by name. As if there were no walls.

The sadness disappeared from his smile, and Sheila relaxed her shoulders. After all, a gentle smile suit Wilfrecht the best.

While they were smiling at each other, a corner of her mind was thinking about the political upheaval that had caused his suffering.

How many people had been deprived of happiness by the previous political upheaval? The scars of being caught in the whirlpool of an unreasonable era were still fresh and would never heal.

Through her many encounters during her training, Sheila came to want to save many people.

Perhaps protecting the country would lead to saving more people than anything else. The thought was strengthened as the image of her expressionless guardian formed in her mind.

Wilfrecht lifted Sheila’s hands while she was lost in thought.

He knelt down like a devout believer and gently dropped a kiss on her dirt-stained fingertips.

“――!?”

Sheila froze, unable to comprehend what had just happened. Combined with his refined mannerisms, it was as if a prince suddenly appeared before her eyes.

‘No, he is a genuine prince.’

Sheila seemed to be quite disturbed by his action.

However, Wilfrecht, who gently smiled with his eyes, didn’t seem to have any ill intentions at all and Sheila felt like a bit of a fool for being embarrassed.

“Thank you, Sheila. I will be stronger.”

“Um….. Yes.”

Despite the great difference in their feelings, the two of them held hands and smiled at each other.