There was not much to say, so Shen Yu just stayed silent and gave her the warmth she needed. He felt her her stiff body loosening up and knew she was getting relaxed.
Li Xiaojing smiled bitterly.
"My Sect still didn't give up and the Emperor easily massacred the members of my sect. He's a cruel bastard so he massacred only men who tried to resist and kept women alive. For one simple reason, he wanted to give them to his soldiers to play with."
She sighed and continued her tragic tale.
"I had lost my will to live, honestly. But I knew everything was because of me, so I accepted his proposal. I used some methods which I don't want to go in details for now, to force him to make me the empress and also let go of my Sect.
"Even though he's a madman, he knows how to do things. He knew if he tried to push us to the end, he would just get a backlash. Our sect has a history of many years, after all."
She sighed.
"And that big incident ended with me marrying the Emperor and becoming the Empress. On the first night, he defiled me and honestly, I don't even remember that day. It was a chore to me. After that day, he lost interest in me for some reason and never bothered with me.
"I was fine with it and simply secluded myself from everything, wondering why was I even alive at that point? What was the point of my existence? I thought of ending my life a lot but I couldn't bring myself to do that for some reason."
She touched her stomach and smiled genuinely, for the time in a while.
Li Xiaojing smiled.
"Yes, my mother, the Sect Leader of Mystic Moon Sect. She was adventurous in her younger years and had collected information about many things. So when I contacted her, she told me to unseal Xiaoyan's eyes as they were harming her.
"Unfortunately, you know how the events after unsealing were. Xiaoyan just grew scared of everything, even of her own mother. I still remember the fearful look she gave me back then, that really hurted me, you know. But I couldn't even blame her."
She took a deep breath and continued.
"But I didn't give up. She is my daughter, my everything. So, although it took some time, I gradually brought her back to normal with my love and support, or atleast that's what I thought. But looking back, I guess she just got used to everything and matured early on. She saw my intentions and decided to open her heart to me, but that was only for me. It was then I learned of the things she saw in her Visions, the things that had been tormenting her for years. I cried a lot that night while hugging her."
A bittersweet smile appeared on her face as she said.
"And that silly child accompanied me and comforted me. She was the one who was going through all that, but I was the one who needed to comfort. I really am pathetic, aren't I?"
Shen Yu chuckled softly.
"I disagree with that. I'm sorry, I'm not good with words so I can't really express my feelings properly. But, you are the greatest mother I've ever known, Xiaojing. It's just the circumstances which forced you and Zhiyan into such a state. Honestly, I can't imagine myself doing the same if I was in either of your's shoes. So, don't look down yourself, as you are also looking down on Zhiyan by doing that. You are her everything, she looks upto you so are you saying her judgement is bad?"
Li Xiaojing was stumped.
"You say you aren't good with words, yet in such a short time, you have shaken my heart so much just by your words. You truly are devious one, Hubby."