Chapter 309

Chapter 309

Translator: yun

He tried to wipe his tears away with the back of his hand but they wouldn’t stop. After staring blankly at the tears dripping down from the tip of his nose, he slowly raised his head.

“Hernan.”

I called his name without realising it.

“Are you really Hernan?”

With my hand on his cheek, he couldn’t bring himself to speak for a while.

When he finally opened his eyes, mine were met with his blue ones.

“Yes. Princess.”

When I heard his voice, my words got stuck in my throat.

“It is me.”

That clear, pure blue colour. He stared at me with the eyes that reminded me of a lake in the summer.

“Really, it really is you...”

I could no longer see him through my blurring vision so I lowered my head.

“What a relief. I am so very glad. I really am...”

His hand gripped mine tighter. I could tell now. The way he held my hand, trying not to hurt me. This really was Hernandez.

“I’m glad you’ve returned.”

I tried to swallow my tears as I spoke.

“The fact that you’re no longer the one pointing your sword at me...”

Hernan grimaced at my words.

“My apologies.”

His lips were trembling

“... My apologies, princess.”

“No.”

But he didn’t seem to have heard me. Just when I was about to offer him more words of comfort.

He tugged on my waist. When I opened my eyes again, I found myself in his embrace.

“Why have I committed such terrible sins against you?”

“Hernan? I’m alright so could you let me go first so we could talk?”

I felt uncomfortable being unable to see his face. But he continued to bury his face into my neck and sweep his hand down my back.

“The God of Beasts had told me something, saying how telling me that would be his last favour.”

He mumbled with his face still buried. His muffled voice gradually sounded clearer.

“No, he told me those should have been memories I’ve forgotten.”

I paused in the midst of patting his shoulders.

“I couldn’t remember and I shouldn’t have but he had left them to me as a gift since it would be our last time together.”

“... No. No. That was not a gift.”

I replied flatly.

“Don’t speak anymore, Hernan.”

Before I realised it, I could feel my shoulders getting wet. I tried to force myself out of his arms.

But his arms only dug deeper into my waist. He clung onto me like a young cub who didn’t want to be separated from his mother. The warmth from his body as he hugged me hurt from the tightness.

I finally managed to get him off me after a few seconds. I could see his eyes were red from tears. I covered his red eyes with my hand.

“Forget them.”

Even his tears looked pure and beautiful. Streams of his tears flowed through my hands.

“They are not for you to handle.”

Why would he need to be able to remember my deaths now?

“My apologies must have been meaningless. How empty my apologies must have been when I couldn’t even remember...”

I felt the urge to cover his mouth with my other hand.

“No. No, it wasn’t. Hernan.”

“So, this was what you meant when you said I stood on the sidelines. I shouldn’t have apologised.”

A big hand covered my own. I couldn’t stop a man from crying for me.

I merely smiled out of pity.

“I did not live a life that deserves sympathy.”

He must have had a hard time carrying the burden of his own life.

I never dreamed of being able to not choose or giving up.

My death did not result in the end of my life but rather the pain and suffering of my loved ones.

Just like it did during that month of Habermia, the first time I died.

The options I had been forcefully given pained me. Even if I were to make an extreme choice to end this life, it would only bring me back to the moment of my choice.

Regression would only drive people crazy.

The people who supported me–Fleon, Dane and Lord Ray, The maids who loved me dearly.

The reason why I could finally become friendly to the maids, after I had been so exhausted from the countless regressions, was because I was hiding it from Dane and Fleon.

‘I didn’t want to show the fact that I had changed.’

The people who remained the same despite my regressions. I didn’t want to admit to myself that I had become alone in a world where everyone remained the same. I didn’t want to get caught.

Even though I had been desperately avoiding death, I did not reach out to them for help.

‘Castor.’

It was at that moment did I realise.

He, who had regressed thousands of times until he became the man he was now, would have been way more worn out than me.

“I am going to destroy my last bit of conscience and the centre of this Empire. Will you chase after me?”

I had Fleon and Dane, So, who did he have?

He had Julian.

I burst through the door.

Pant. Pant. I took a deep breath before staring ahead of me.

Plop.

I saw a figure collapsing right before my eyes.

‘Who is it?’

The first thing that caught my eyes was the dishevelled back hair.

‘Castor? No.’

No. His hair was too short and his stature was too small. I looked up to find Castor. And to his side was Julian with his back against the wall.

‘Then he was... the 5th Prince?’

Out of all the Imperial members, the 5th Prince was the only one other than Castor to have black hair. Although I had never seen his face before since he rarely showed himself in public.

Upon closer inspection, he looked very young. I spotted the broken glasses laying next to him. I raised my head.

“Ashley.”

Castor called out my name pleasantly.

“I felt my connection with Hernan breaking a while ago. You must have been responsible.”

He smiled very calmly.

For some reason, the room was very dark. The light streaming through the gap in the curtains drew a diagonal line across his face.

“Hernan would have told you two things. I don’t know why you ended up coming here. When you had been given the choice to head to the crystal or come to me.”

Castor pointed out accurately.

“Did you choose me?”

He stretched his bloody sword out before laughing as though he was in a good mood.

“Brother...”

The moment Julian, whose face had turned white as a sheet, called out for Castor. The smile disappeared from Castor’s face,

I quickly reached out. Purple butterflies spread out from my hand before wrapping around Castor’s hands momentarily.

“Was the 2nd Prince, Julian, your last remaining conscience?”

His silence affirmed my doubts.

Pssh.

The chains my butterflies had created broke one by one and the power struggle between us continued.

“I was planning on finishing everything so that I could welcome you the moment you arrived.”

Castor murmured lowly.

“You often go beyond my expectations.”

Castor stopped resisting before staring at me as he stood there entrapped. Madness continued to swirl in his eyes.

A smile slowly spread on his face.

“Yes. This brother of mine is my last remaining conscience.”

He confessed the truth calmly.

“We used to be very close. Ashley, as I’ve mentioned before, I know the way to escape the regressions. Do you know how to escape the curse?”

I had been awakened but I had not been released from the curse yet. Castor spoke as if he was well aware.

“You’d have to kill someone you loved with your own hands.”