CH 64

Shen Fangyu, who had waited for a response for a long time, interrupted quickly, “Wait a minute, Jiang Xu.”

He finally let go of the potato and put down the spoon, saying, “If you’re sending me a good guy card, then don’t say anything.”

Jiang Xu fell silent at his words and took another bite of the glutinous rice cake.

“No way,” Shen Fangyu’s expression was a little subtle and a little incredulous, “you’re not going to say anything?!”

Even after saying that, Jiang Xu still didn’t say anything.

Shen Fangyu got out his phone, tapped on it, and after a while, he put it down. After that, he took two sips of water, slowly took a breath, and said to Jiang Xu, “I really like you.”

“I know.” Jiang Xu said.

“I also want to be with you.”

Jiang Xu took a spoon and stirred the crystal-clear noodles, “Mm.”

Shen Fangyu let this soft nail touch him to the point of no return and finally couldn’t help but ask, “Jiang Xu, do you like me?”

It was quite embarrassing to ask such a thing in this situation.

As expected, Jiang Xu didn’t even say “mmm” this time.

After a long silence, Shen Fangyu sighed and asked, “Then what do you… think?”

Jiang Xu glanced at him and then withdrew his gaze.

‘He’s too anxious,’ Jiang Xu thought.

Shen Fangyu was just overwhelmed by a pile of dopamine and serotonin right now; they had spent day and night together, been honest with each other, and done a lot of things where they touched each other, so they were prone to all sorts of impulses and moments that could probably be called ambiguous and heartwarming.

These wildly secreted hormones can make people lose their minds.

But Jiang Xu had to remind himself that he couldn’t lose his mind.

He had a baby in his stomach that was about to be born, and before thinking about the question of whether he really liked Shen Fangyu, the first thing he had to think about was the responsibility and risk he would have to take when choosing to start this relationship.

He had thought about it all night last night and had concluded that Shen Fangyu hadn’t thought it through.

A momentary impulse is not love, and a momentary liking may not evolve into a lasting, true love.

In fact, while immersed in that tender and loving kiss, he was swayed and even thought about saying to Shen Fangyu, “Why don’t we give this a try.”

But if he said yes now, what about after that?

They weren’t teenagers, who could start a relationship on the spur of the moment when their hormones kicked in and didn’t have to think about the gains and losses.

At work, they are colleagues in the same office, and in life, there was a child between them.

A relationship that can fall apart at any time is undoubtedly the most unstable element of all.

The stakes were too high, especially when the relationship might just fall apart one day when one wakes up and says there is no love.

The day the hormones stop being secreted, the feelings fade, or Shen Fangyu could fall in love with someone else and they break up, how are they going to get along after?

It would be hard to even think about keeping in touch.

On the one hand, it’s impossible to quit a job in the system and give up years of accumulation because of a broken relationship, and on the other hand, they are partners who have agreed to raise their child together, and when they break up, what about Xiaoxiao?

She would be upset.

Besides, what if …… the operation fails?

He can’t respond to Shen Fangyu’s feelings with a “let’s try,” enjoying a brief moment of sweetness before the pain of losing a lover is thrown at him.

There was a difference between losing someone you liked but did not catch, and losing someone you like and were in a relationship with.

Has Shen Fangyu thought about this? Has he really thought it through?

“So.…” Shen Fangyu asked, “You think it’s because we have a child and because we’re colleagues, that we’re not suitable?”

Jiang Xu didn’t deny it.

Shen Fangyu nodded, and after a long time, he still couldn’t help but say, “Zhong Lan is also in the same office as you, why didn’t you think so much when you were chasing her?”

Jiang Xu’s hand paused.

Because normal people would choose the sequence of confession, kissing, and then rolling in bed to dissipate the uneasiness and progress step by step.

But they were the opposite.

Having a child and not having a child felt different.

In addition, he cared more about Shen Fangyu than Zhong Lan. Because he cared more, it was inevitable that he had more concerns.

“Every couple needs to go through the motions, don’t you think you’re overthinking this?” Shen Fangyu asked, “Or are you too sensitive because of the unstable hormones during pregnancy?”

Jiang Xu lowered his eyes, wondering if it was because of Shen Fangyu’s statement that he suddenly felt his sacrum begin to ache again.

“Jiang Xu,” Shen Fangyu said, “you like me too. It’s not that you don’t have feelings at all, but that I’m different in your heart,” he asked, “ right?”

Jiang Xu confessed, “Yes.”

Shen Fangyu’s eyes flickered, “You just don’t want to go any further with me because you don’t want to take the risk of a possible breakup.”

Jiang Xu paused for a moment, the constant pain made him restless, and his tone suddenly became fierce, “Yes, so what?”

“Zhong Lan’s girlfriend said …… that if you like someone, you want to be with them,” Shen Fangyu commented, “I think she’s right.”

“So you probably don’t like me that much or don’t believe me right now,” he paused, trying to adjust his expression, “but it’s okay, as long as you have some feelings for me, I have hope. At least I have room to work hard. “

Jiang Xu was in so much pain that he had to brace himself to keep from showing it on his face. He was silent for a long time before finally saying to Shen Fangyu, “Let’s first calm down.”

“You don’t think I’m calm?” Shen Fangyu asked.

“Will you kiss me after calming down?”

Shen Fangyu’s gaze paused on the surface of the boiling hotpot pan. His eyelashes twitched at Juang Xu’s words, and he finally raised his eyes to meet Jiang Xu’s gaze.

“Why don’t we try it now?”

“I’m calm now,” he said, “and I can kiss you here and now if you want.”

Jiang Xu’s heart tightened, and he subconsciously glared at Shen Fangyu.

He couldn’t see much of an expression on Shen Fangyu’s face, and he wasn’t sure if he was sad or thinking about something else, but he looked like he was making a casual statement.

But Jiang Xu didn’t expect Shen Fangyu to suddenly turn his face away before he could observe what was going on.

And just as Jiang Xu was worrying about his neck, Shen Fangyu looked back at him and retorted with some unquestionable words, “Jiang Xu, even if I calm down, I still like you.”

“There will be no regrets, nor will there be any change.”

After he finished this sentence, he reached for the spoon again and finally took the piece of potato, which was full of vicissitudes, and chucked it into Jiang Xu’s bowl.

Perhaps he didn’t realize that he had just made a big confession, or perhaps he felt that the point was made and that to say more would be annoying, so he digressed and said:

“From today onwards, I’ll take you to and from work, and you don’t have to do the night shift anymore, I’ll do it for you.”

“There is no need.”

“Don’t try to be a hero,” Shen Fangyu gave him a sidelong glance, “just think of it as me paying the rent, okay? Otherwise, I’ll lock you up at home tomorrow and not let you go to work. It just so happens that the handcuffs I bought earlier can be used twice.”

Jiang Xu laughed in exasperation and was about to speak when Shen Fangyu said, “Are you going to ask me why I’m not a prison guard again?”

Jiang Xu, who had been robbed of his lines, “……”

“Stop thinking about helping me find suitable jobs every day; I don’t want to be a prison guard.” Probably because the paper window was already pierced, and the words that should be said were already poured out, Shen Fangyu became bolder and unrestrained. “I just want to be with you, I want to see you every day. “

“……”

Jiang Xu felt that Shen Fangyu might not have understood what he meant.

He had told Shen Fangyu to calm down, not be so calm.

“So it’s a deal then?” Seeing that he didn’t say anything, Shen Fangyu went for the conclusion.

Jiang Xu shifted his gaze and took a deep breath to suppress the pain, saying, “As you wish.”

Shen Fangyu thought about it and added, “By the way, did Teacher Cui tell you that this weekend is the A Medical University anniversary? She asked us to go when we had time, and it just so happens that it’s time for us to go back to school.”

There is an old tradition in the eight-year clinical program of A Medical University. No matter which class, after graduation, they all have to go back and adopt an old A Medical University tree as a class unit. Ten years of trees, one hundred years of trees, is a legacy that the school values.

“She told me.”

“Are you going?” Shen Fangyu asked.

Jiang Xu knew that according to Shen Fangyu’s character, he would definitely go, as many of their classmates would be there. In addition, many leaders and teachers would also be attending the school celebration, so this was a good opportunity for him to make contacts.

Before he could answer, Shen Fangyu said, “If you don’t go, I won’t go.”

“You can go.” Jiang Xu said.

“I just told you that I want to be with you, being in the same space is fine.” Shen Fangyu finished and added, “Of course living in the same town doesn’t count, it has to be slightly closer.”

Jiang Xu paused: “Aren’t you going abroad?”

“You know?” Shen Fangyu asked with surprise, then reacted, “Did Teacher Cui tell you?”

At the time before that crazy night, he and Jiang Xu were competing for a place to attend an academic conference in H Province. Later on, Jiang Xu was not quite in shape for several group meetings, and since Director Cui had brought Jiang Xu to the conference last year, Director Cui took Shen Fangyu this year.

No one expected that because the presentation given by Shen Fangyu’s group in Province H was quite brilliant, it would arouse the interest of a big professor in the industry in Country M. It just so happened that he was planning to hold another academic salon recently, so he invited Jihua Hospital in the hope of getting Shen Fangyu to go over to give a presentation.

Jiang Xu: “She said you hadn’t agreed yet.”

“It’s for several days, and I don’t want to worry about you being here alone,” Shen Fangyu said, “I asked Teacher Cui if she could bring you as well, but she said that the academic exchange she had offered to take us to was coming up soon and that this one was only a small conference so there was no need to make a fuss. So I told her I’d think about it.”

“How long is it going to take?”

“A round trip would take two or three days, there’s no way I could go and return the next day as I did in H Province.” He was so worried that Jiang Xu was home alone that he took a taxi to the airport and came back immediately after the presentation.

Jiang Xu pursed his lips and said to him, “You should go.”

Shen Fangyu was silent for a moment, suddenly understanding, “Do you …… not want to see me these two days?”

Seeing that Jiang Xu didn’t answer, Shen Fangyu nodded to himself and said, “Understood. Then I’ll send a message to Teacher Cui saying that I’ll go to the meeting.”

Jiang Xu didn’t actually mean that.

He just felt that that opportunity was great and that Shen Fangyu should go.

But saying something like that wasn’t conducive to the two people trying to calm down.

A hot pot made the two of them drift farther apart, and finally, Jiang Xu, who was in a cold sweat, turned off the fire and said to Shen Fangyu, “Let’s go back.”

But Shen Fangyu had no intention of drifting apart, he blocked Jiang Xu’s hand from turning off the fire and said, “I hope that when I come back, you will like me a little more than you do now.”