#016 – That’s not what a coinflip means

#016 – That’s not what a coinflip means

“Hnng!” I hnng’d as I held the sword with both hands and channeled Ether.

Unfortunately, the orange wisps of Ether refused to leave my hands and transfer into it.

“C’mon... Surely it counts as a tool, right...?”

KaiEbikoOfficial: maybe the handle is insulated?

KaiEbikoOfficial: try touching the blade

I hummed and did as Ebiko suggested, gently sliding my index finger over the blade while trying to push Ether into it.

But it just wouldn’t let me. Like something was blocking me.

I deflated with a moan.

“What a waste of skill points...” I groaned.

KaiEbikoOfficial: don’t give up yet!

KaiEbikoOfficial: maybe you just need to practice!

I pursed my lips.

“Practice? How am I supposed to practice if I can’t do it at all? This makes no sense...”

KaiEbikoOfficial: it says tools

KaiEbikoOfficial: maybe try it with a tool

KaiEbikoOfficial: the mop!

I blinked, then quickly got up, sheathed my sword, and ran back to the entrance of the dungeon.

“You’re right, Ebi! That thing is definitely a tool!”

Not to mention, it supposedly passively used my Ether to power itself, and now that I could use Ether manually myself, I should be able to tell, right?

I skidded to a half as I stepped over the threshold and zeroed in on the mop before grabbing it.

“Okay, sooo...”

I made the wisps of Ether dance under my skin once more and tried pushing it into the thing. And to my delight, it worked! I could feel the mop grabbing my Ether for itself as water began dripping out of it.

I hummed and tried to focus on that feeling for a minute, trying to commit it to muscle memory. Then I unsheathed my sword again and tried doing the same thing.

The sword resisted my attempts though.

I grunted in annoyance, but kept on trying.

“It’s fighting me...”

KaiEbikoOfficial: there has to be a way

KaiEbikoOfficial: why have Ether-conductive sword if it doesn’t work?

“Yeah, I know, but...” My eyes narrowed as they caught the circuitry on it.

I slid my finger over the blade once more and tried to push Ether into different spots. It felt like the spots with the circuits weren’t pushing back as much, but it still wasn’t...

The sword suddenly sucked out my offered Ether and popped with a spark and a small flash of light.

“Gwah?!”

I dropped the sword in surprise.

KaiEbikoOfficial: !!!

KaiEbikoOfficial: success??!

I stared with wide eyes and carefully picked the sword up again. “...Maybe?”

I tried to find the same spot on the sword again, pushing in much less Ether than before. I found it near the base of the blade, where it took my Ether and lit the circuits up, similarly to when I’d dripped the potion on it the first time.

“Okay...!”

I kept going for a few minutes, touching the thing all over, trying to find how exactly I could make this work without electrocuting myself.

As it turned out, there were a couple of spots on the blade where the Ether could enter more easily, presumably used for the lightning-shooting I’d been promised. But more importantly, I also found a specific spot on the sword’s hilt, where I could move my little finger, that sucked up my Ether even more efficiently than any of the other spots and lit the circuitry up like a christmas tree.

I had a massive grin on my face at that point. I’d finally figured out how this damn sword worked!

I gripped the sword in hand again, pointed it inside the dungeon, slid my little finger to the activator, fed it some Ether, and shouted, “Lightning bolt!”

...Before immediately yelping as the sword let out a bang and nearly blinded me with its brightness.

I blinked away the white spots while shaking my head. Then I pouted at the stupid sword.

“Come on!”

KaiEbikoOfficial: you okay?!

KaiEbikoOfficial: that was way too bright

“Ugh, yeah. Sorry. I don’t know how to adjust the output yet.” I glowered. “Or how to actually shoot with it! Why did it flashbang me instead?!”

I hummed.

“How much can it hold...?” I mused out loud before dipping the bucket back into the ooze. It gobbled up a good amount before the ooze stopped disappearing and just pooled inside the bucket like normal. It was hard to tell how much exactly it held, but I estimated about a bathtub’s worth.

“Fuel restocked! Weapons ready! TIme to smash the dungeon!” I proclaimed as I emptied the excess ooze back into the lake.

Seemingly empty bucket in my left hand and my right hand ready to whip out my sword, I headed back into the dungeon straight to the supposed boss room.

“I hope it’s not as crazy as that killer robot,” I murmured. “It’s a D-rank dungeon though, right? Surely I can handle it?”

KaiEbikoOfficial: you can!

KaiEbikoOfficial: and maybe it’s not a boss room at all

I hummed and stood on my tiptoes to reach the door’s handle, opened the door to the room, and once again carefully looked around. Nothing had changed, of course.

“Alright then... Here goes nothing.”

I stepped into the room, expecting a wide variety of things. From the door slamming shut behind me, to zombies suddenly flooding the room, to the floor exploding to reveal a cyborg mutant zombie boss.

I did not expect a pair of oversized coins to roll out from behind the oversized desk at the end of the room. One of the coins was silver and one of them was gold. Both had the same design as the copper coins I’d gotten from the chest in this place.

“Uhh, money...?” I dumbly said as the two coins turned and rolled in front of the desk where they both stopped.

“Well–”

And then they suddenly moved.The silver coin began spinning on its axis while the gold coin bounced in place a few times, before turning in my direction, and launching itself into a roll straight at me.

“Wha–?!”

I leapt to the side, letting the gold coin fly out of the room through the still open door behind me.

“Are these dungeon monsters?!” I exclaimed before I felt something scream at me to move.

I didn’t question it and began running alongside the room’s walls even as I accidentally dropped my bucket. A moment later I heard numerous sounds of metal pinging against concrete and with a brief glance at the still-spinning silver coin, I realized that it was shooting bullets at the spot where I’d stood. Somehow.

I had no time to ponder how the hell that worked and kept running even as the coin began slowing down its spin. I drew my sword and charged at it, hoping to destroy it before it could start shooting again.

Unfortunately for me, the other coin finally made its return, rolling back into the room and forcing me to stop my charge and jump back to avoid it. What I didn’t expect was for it to pulse with a golden light before golden spikes suddenly stabbed out of the ground where the coin had rolled through. I just barely managed to avoid getting turned into a pincushion and wasted no time in unleashing Fire breath at the gold coin, while dashing to the side, trying to flank the silver one.

The silver coin had completely stopped spinning at this point and faced me with its evil eyes’ face, before jumping in place and flipping. As it did, it launched a silvery fist-sized object straight at me.

I met it with a concentrated Fire breath even as I dashed to the side to dodge it in case the Fire breath didn’t work. The projectile exploded, knocking me back, and I hit the tiled ground with a gasp and a crunch. A white hot pain spiked through my left arm.

I looked up to see that the silver coin had gotten knocked on its back and the gold one was spinning on its axis to put out the fire.

I made the snap decision to retreat.

I sheathed my sword and ran back to the entrance while doing my best to ignore the pain in my left arm. I picked up my bucket on the way there and quickly dashed out of the room even as I heard the telltale sounds of a giant coin spinning on its axis again.

I got out and kicked the door closed moments before I heard the sound of silver bullets hitting the wooden door.

I let out a gasp in relief, breathed in again, and shouted, “How is this D-rank?!”

But before I could read chat again and commiserate with Ebi, the door flung itself open again as the golden coin launched itself through.

I dropped the bucket with a yelp and instinctively drew my sword again even as the thing bulldozed over the chairs in its way. It then hit a wall while flashing, created a bunch of golden spikes on it, bounced a few times because of the impact, turned at me, and launched itself at me again, making a noise similar to freaking tires of a car on asphalt. Somehow.

I jabbed my sword forward, aiming it toward the ground where it was rolling and unleashed a bolt of lightning.

It hit the ground right in front of where it was rolling and the coin wobbled before quickly spinning out of control. I screamed and quickly ducked as the golden coin flew right over my head and crashed into the wall behind me before landing on its face.

It began wobbling like a turtle on its back trying to recover and my mind screamed to finish the thing off right now.

I gripped my sword, stood up, quickly ran to it, and began slashing at it.

It was durable, but less than one would expect of a metal coin. My sword actually made dents in it as I whaled on it.

Then it pulsed in a golden light and I immediately jumped back moments before golden spikes impaled the spot where I’d been just a second ago.

I eyed it dangerously as I grit my teeth and valiantly continued to ignore the pain in my arm.

Not wanting to get close again, I used the sword’s lightning. Two slashes, one jab. All landed on the damn coin, carving chunks out of it.

I was about to continue my assault when the coin suddenly shimmered and turned into mist. Golden this time.

I let out a sigh of relief before remembering the other enemy and looking to the door once more. I heard the telltale sound of a giant coin rolling on the tiled floor in the big room. Much slower than the golden one, but still.

I dashed to my trusty bucket, temporarily put my sword down on the ground, and grabbed a handful of the ooze to replenish myself, hoping it would also heal my arm.

Then I froze and watched in horror as I belatedly realized that the golden mist hadn’t vanished like it normally did. Instead, it wafted through the air, around the door, and into the big room where the silver coin was.

My gamer instincts made me remember the countless bosses of this type from games. The twin bosses. You either needed to kill them both at the same time to win, or slaying one would massively power up the other.

This wasn’t over yet.