Chapter 145: Florida Man Encourages Local Goblin Family to Make More Babies to Fight Depopulation Crisis

As Jiji had become proficient in firearms under Felix's guidance, she volunteered to coach Clover and her tribe in the art of shooting. This freed Felix to return home and gather the lifespan needed for the transportation system.

However, the initial ammunition that was part of the agreement turned out to be insufficient for training purposes. Felix ended up crafting one million rounds of ammunition to satisfy the demands of the lamias and beastmen. Only then did Jiji feel they had enough for practice. Stay tuned with m,v le,mpyr

After replacing the essence stone battery in his jetpack, Felix left Clover's village. Clover, for her part, promised to collect all the treasures her tribe had scavenged from the surrounding area, planning to present them to Felix within a week as part of their ongoing negotiations.

…

Returning home early, Felix went straight to the essence stone room to begin his notorious smoking ritual. The cigars he smoked were deadly, but they granted him extra lifespan at the cost of multiple deaths.

Over the next three days, Felix died, resurrected, died again, resurrected again, and repeated. Each loop yielded him 3,600 years of lifespan. After completing three loops, Felix reached his goal of 10,000 years.

With a few extra days still left in the week, Felix decided to take a short break. He relaxed, checking on his dimensional farmland game to see what his farmer and hobgoblin were up to.

A pixelated screen materialized in front of him, showing the two characters working together peacefully. The farmer was harvesting spirit potatoes, while the hobgoblin had built a new storehouse to manage their growing supply of crops.

However, something caught Felix's attention. Narrowing his eyes, he noticed a subtle yet unmistakable change in the hobgoblin's appearance.

Her belly had become noticeably larger.

'Oh!'

Felix thought, as the realization dawned on him. A grin spread across his face.

'Good job, my guy. You've done it. You're a daddy now.'

Though it had only been a month since the two had been together, Felix figured that fantasy pregnancy timelines didn't exactly follow normal logic. The hobgoblin's belly was already as large as someone nearing the end of their term.

As if on cue, Felix watched the hobgoblin suddenly sit down, visibly in pain. The farmer rushed over to help her.

Before Felix could fully comprehend what was happening, the hobgoblin let out a sharp squeal, and a small, green baby was born right in front of him.

Jessica's system portrait appeared on screen, expressionless as always.

*DING*

<Nameless Hobgoblin has given birth to a hobgoblin.>

<This is a celebratory occasion. Would you like to spend 1,000 years of lifespan to name the family?>

Felix frowned and glanced at Jessica. "Why should I waste a thousand years of my life on that? If they want a name, they can name it themselves."

<A name given by you could grant them special powers. Their work efficiency would increase. For example, if you give the goblin girl a feminine name, she might gain life-skills related abilities. But if you give her a muscular name, she could develop combat-related abilities. It depends on the meaning of the name. Please think carefully.>

"…"

Was this a pay-to-win system?

Felix despised those kinds of games. They always lured players into spending their hard-earned money to get ahead. But this was different. These weren't just virtual characters—these were real beings, people who depended on him. If spending some of his life energy could improve their lives, he figured it was worth it.

"Fine. Let me think..." Felix mumbled, feeling the weight of his decision. Naming them wasn't just about slapping on labels; names had power. They could shape destinies, grant abilities, and alter the course of lives.

He closed his eyes, focusing hard, and mentally sifted through possible names. For ten minutes, he whispered ideas to himself, each one carefully weighed.

Finally, Felix made his decision.

"The farmer will be known as Terris. It's derived from Terra! It should mean something like 'Earth,' right?"

*DING*

<Understood. 1,000 years of lifespan have been consumed. You have bestowed the name 'Terris' for the Nameless Farmer.>

The game screen flashed, and a bright beacon of light shone down on the pixelated farmer. Felix watched, surprised, as Terris looked up in awe. The little figure on the screen shed a tear, gazing back at Felix as though aware of the magnitude of the moment.

Terris had been reborn in a sense.

<Terris has been blessed. He has awakened new abilities: Green Thumbs and Land Enrichment!>

Felix sat back, startled by the notification.

<Green Thumbs - The crops planted by Terris will always yield double.>

<Land Enrichment - The time for the crops to mature is reduced by half.>

Felix widened his eyes in amazement. He mentally calculated the possibilities. Normally, a single seed of spirit potato might yield two to five potatoes. With this upgrade, Terris could potentially harvest eight to twenty from just one seed, granted that he planted the seeds twice.

"This is... insane."

But there was one catch. Felix couldn't force Terris to hand over his crops. The man had his own life, his own needs. Felix wouldn't dare act like a tyrant and demand every last potato, even if the thought of barrels of spirit potato beer did make him salivate a little.

"Well, they should have excess harvest, right?" Felix reasoned. "I'm sure they'll give me some of the extra potatoes they can't store."

His mind wandered to the spirit potatoes already sitting in his inventory, converted into beer. He hadn't tasted it yet, saving it for a special occasion. Maybe this was a sign that the time for celebration was near.

Felix cleared his throat. "Next, the goblin. You will be known as Gelda! And the baby's name will be Kip!"

*DING*

<1,000 years of lifespan have been consumed. You have bestowed the name 'Gelda' for the Nameless Hobgoblin.>

<1,000 years of lifespan have been consumed. You have bestowed the name 'Kip' for the Nameless Hobgoblin Baby.>

Felix froze. "Wait... I thought it was 1,000 years for all of them together." Sёarch* The nôvel_Fire.ηet website on Google to access chapters of novels early and in the highest quality.

Jessica's screen popped up, her usual calm, expressionless face looking down at him.

<Sorry for the vague information. It's 1,000 years per person.>

Felix smacked his forehead, groaning. "Great. That's just perfect. I would've waited on the baby's name if I'd known that."

Still, what was done was done. Two more beams of light shot down, enveloping Gelda and her newborn.

Felix watched as the light restored Gelda's strength. Her once-exhausted frame seemed to recover instantly. The wounds from childbirth vanished, and her energy returned.

Without hesitation, Gelda scooped up baby Kip, standing tall and smiling broadly. She glanced at Felix through the screen and bowed deeply, her gratitude unmistakable.

<Gelda has been blessed. She has awakened new abilities: Great Teacher and Great Mother!>

<Great Teacher - Gelda can impart all her knowledge to her family.>

<Great Mother - Gelda's children will always be healthy, strong, and smart. She can also give birth faster.>

Felix raised an eyebrow. "Faster? Well, that's... something, I guess."

But the game wasn't finished.

<Kip has been blessed. He has awakened new abilities: Little Hercules and Robust!>

<Little Hercules - Kip's physical strength is tripled.>

<Robust - Kip's physical growth is doubled.>

Felix blinked at the screen, slightly overwhelmed. "This baby's going to be a powerhouse."

He couldn't help but chuckle at the thought of a tiny, green hobgoblin toddler outmuscling grown men. But then again, in this bizarre system of his, nothing really surprised him anymore. Even though he had lost 3,000 years of his life, the smile on Gelda's face and the prospects for the family's future made it all seem... worth it.

"Guess I'm going to need a lot more beer for the next celebration."

Felix shook his head when he saw the details of Gelda's new abilities, especially the *Great Mother* skill. The title itself made him chuckle, but it also sparked a concern. How many little goblin "monkeys" would start running around his farm now? Was she going to become some sort of baby factory?

But then another worry crept into his mind—their bloodline. Terris and Gelda were the only two in the farm, a family of one. If Gelda's *Great Mother* ability kicked into high gear, wouldn't their future children face problems down the line? Who would they marry if there were no other people around? The thought of an isolated family tree running into genetic complications wasn't exactly comforting.

Felix paused for a moment, then lightly smacked the back of his head. He'd been overthinking it. He could just spawn new system characters for the farm, let them grow, populate, and resolve the problem naturally. The system had solutions for everything, after all.

For now, though, Felix had done everything he could for the little family. He sent his usual daily supplies through the game and scribbled a quick note:

"Don't forget the tribute if you have too many potatoes."

As soon as Terris received the message, the pixelated farmer prostrated himself on the ground, slamming his forehead into the soil three times while making some strange, almost worshipful noise. Felix couldn't help but laugh. The devotion, while flattering, felt a little over the top.

With a smile, he closed the game. He'd see how things would progress over the coming days. For now, he had more important matters to tend to, like preparing for the incoming lamia tribe and surviving whatever chaos they might bring.

After resting and gathering his strength, Felix resumed his grim ritual. He began with the more manageable Mancant Inferno Cigarettes, which gave him a steady boost without the immediate risks. The cigars, however, were another story. He braced himself and lit up the Phoenix Ash Cigar, knowing what was coming.

As expected, it killed him after an hour, and once again, he was reborn—his soul torn from his body for a brief moment before snapping back, rejuvenated but drained.

…

Four days later, Felix had completed all his preparations. Stepping out of his house, he set off toward the eastern part of his floating island, where the land was most fertile. This was where he planned to place the next piece of his expanding domain.

With a deep breath, he opened the system interface and made the necessary purchase—*Fateful Plaza*, the teleportation structure that would link his territory to the outside world.

As the system deducted the lifespan cost from his reserves, Felix glanced at the skies, silently hoping that the plaza wouldn't demand even more of his limited years just to function. The previous purchases had already taken their toll, and every year shaved off brought him closer to the brink. He muttered a quick prayer, half-serious, half out of habit.

"Please don't let this thing bleed me dry any further," he sighed, half-expecting some hidden fee or requirement to pop up.