Volume 1 - CH 1

So here it is! The super secret work that I’ve been stockpile translating! Huzzah!

Content warning for the entire work: There are some dark bits (mainly to do with Gu Yan’s past, mentioned obliquely) as well as one sexual assault scene (not between the main characters), and I’ll warn for these when we get there.

I’ll also be translating from the uncensored Myrics version of the text, so there will be some sex scenes. Mostly not super explicit, and none of them are actually labeled R-18, but they are there! And won’t be entirely fade to black either.

Speaking of which, a sex scene is in this very first chapter in fact. :T

Oh, also, for the record, this version has the chapters organized differently than Jinjiang’s. I’m going with the internal chapter numbering (which I assume corresponds to the published text chaptering) rather than the external Myrics chapter numbering. So this translation will have 20 chapters total, ten for each volume, along with some extras. The Jinjiang text, which I assume is what most people are familiar with, is censored and hence shorter than this one, even though it appears to have more chapters. Just something to keep in mind!

Volume 1, Chapter 1

Splash.

Gu Yan had been submerged in the cold water for too long that, when he came up, he felt a bout of vertigo, and even the sound of the director yelling, “Cut!” sounded as if it was coming from far away, vague and indistinct.

The new assistant Xiao-Chen rushed over with a giant towel, wrapping his dripping wet body in it while excitedly shouting, “Yan-ge, Director He said this take passed.”

That voice was too loud, making everyone’s ears ring.

Gu Yan narrowed his eyes and softly made a sound in acknowledgment, his voice carrying a slightly hoarse quality. His black hair was soaked through, and droplets were sliding down his fair cheeks. Under the studio lights, his entire face seemed to glisten, making him look hair-raisingly beautiful.

Although in actuality Gu Yan’s appearance wasn’t exactly feminine, the combination of his jet-black eyes, straight nose, and delicate facial features could be described only with the word “beautiful”.

How could anyone not love such a beauty?

Even the director had forgotten his previous terrible acting and was hurriedly shouting at people to pull him up, even saying a few appropriately comforting words.

Gu Yan had always been reserved, and so after he confirmed that he had finished shooting all his scenes for the day, he said a word to the director before then heading towards the lounge while wrapped in the large towel.

Xiao-Chen hurriedly followed, unceasing in his loud chatter, “Yan-ge, Director He’s face just then looked super ugly, and I really thought he was about to explode… But you won’t get sick from staying so long in that water, right? When you get back, you better soak in some hot water or else…”

Gu Yan didn’t pay attention to his talk. He leisurely changed his clothes, wiped his hair, and packed up his things, and then he even picked up an entertainment magazine on the table to glance over.

For the sake of magazine sales, the made-up gossip seemed to grow more ridiculous by the day. Last week, they said that a certain male celebrity had an illegitimate son who was already in high school, and this week, they were saying that a certain highly-sought-after female celebrity who had been appearing on television a lot recently was suspected of being the new lover of a higher-up in her management company. With the vivid and colorful descriptions along with some blurry secret photos, it really made the whole matter seem real.

New lover?

Gu Yan’s eyes twitched, and he hastily pressed down on his hand before throwing that magazine back to its original spot. To Xiao-Chen, he said, “I still have something to do, so I’m going to leave first. You should go back to the company by yourself.”

“Yes, yes, yes.”

Although Xiao-Chen was a chatterbox, he thankfully still listened attentively, following behind Gu Yan the whole way.

Right when they were about to reach the door, Gu Yan suddenly stopped.

Xiao-Chen almost ran into him and hurriedly asked, “Yan-ge, what is it?”

“My phone… I forgot it in the lounge.” Those groundless rumors from that magazine had actually made him this forgetful.

An actor’s cellphone couldn’t be carelessly lost. Without even waiting for Gu Yan’s instructions, Xiao-Chen volunteered, shouting, “I’ll go get it!”

Before having even finished speaking, this person had hastily turned around and started running back.

When he reached the location, he saw that the lounge door was closed, though some intermittent voices could be heard from within. The voices came from both men and women, and Xiao-Chen recognized one of them as a supporting actor who had been acting alongside Gu Yan not long ago, having had to redo that scene with him over ten times.

“…and he’s said to be such a hotshot celebrity. I can’t believe his acting is this bad. Good thing that Director He has some self-control and didn’t flip over the tables.”

“Haha, you didn’t know that he was a famous flower vase? No matter what role he’s in, his acting all comes out the same way, but he has a big financial backer supporting him, so when he acts, it’s always as the lead.”

“But it’s only his face that’s good.”

“Tch, how do you know that it isn’t his skills in bed that are good?”

A roar of laughter followed that line.

Although they didn’t mention any names, even an idiot would know who they were talking about.

Xiao-Chen was still young and hadn’t been an assistant for long, so he wasn’t used to encountering these kinds of situations and immediately froze up, not sure whether he should enter or leave. Right as he was at a loss, a hand suddenly passed over his shoulder and gently pushed open the lounge door.

The laughter immediately ceased, as if something had gotten stuck in the throats of the people inside.

Gu Yan was holding his arm at the door, his hair still slightly wet, as he asked, “My cellphone?”

Xiao-Chen answered in a stupor, “I-I still haven’t gotten it.”

Gu Yan nodded and, under everyone’s mortified expressions, walked directly into the room to grab his cellphone himself. And then he actually looked around, his handsome face carrying a hint of a smile, “I won’t disturb all of you further. Feel free to continue.”

When he finished, he generously pulled along Xiao-Chen and left.

His elegance was impeccable.

It took a long time for Xiao-Chen to recover his senses, and he anxiously asked, “Yan-ge, y-you aren’t angry?”

“Why?” Gu Yan thought for a moment, and then as if he finally thought of something, said, “Oh, you’re talking about the way they praised my bedroom skills? That’s right, I also think the words they used were too plain. They should’ve added at least two or three more descriptors.”

“…”

Xiao-Chen was immediately speechless. He saw that Gu Yan’s expression was the same as always, and unable to tell whether this was simply a corny joke or not, he didn’t dare to respond.

Gu Yan didn’t drive today, so he simply stood by the front door and made a phone call. Not long later, a black sedan appeared at the intersection and slowly drove over. After the vehicle made a complete stop, the chauffeur stepped out and opened the door for the back seat.

Gu Yan waved to Xiao-Chen and then folded himself into the car.

Xiao-Chen was at least able to recognize that this was the company boss’ own private car, and from this angle, he was coincidentally able to see that another man was already sitting in the car. The man was wearing a suit and tie, looking immaculately dressed. His face was obscured by the dim light of the car interior, but his fingers were strong and slender, and he firmly held onto Gu Yan’s left hand.

Gu Yan didn’t protest.

On the contrary, his lips curved, and he slowly started smiling, with tender sweetness as if he was looking at his most beloved person.

“Bang!”

The moment the door closed, the car drove off.

Xiao-Chen was inwardly tongue-tied, thinking that what the people in the lounge said wasn’t wrong after all.

What’s wrong with acting so badly in front of the camera?

As long as he acted well when the cameras were off, then it was enough.

***

The ice-cold Gu Yan was currently smiling.

He was sitting comfortably in the car, and his smile was definitely flawless; in order to create the perfect arc of his mouth, he had practiced before a mirror countless times. For the sake of earning favor from his financial backer, he naturally had to do his utmost to play this role of a flower vase well.

Sure enough, Qin Zhiyuan was extremely satisfied.

“Why is your hair wet?” Slender fingers flit over his forehead, softly brushing aside his jet-black hair, and that deep voice carried with it a lingering tenderness.

Gu Yan loosened his body and closed his eyes to accommodate. “We just finished shooting the scene where I commit suicide in the bathroom.”

“Are you tired? I’ll send you home first.”

“No need, it’s rare for you to have free time.”

“I’m on break tomorrow.” Qin Zhiyuan laughed in a low voice and moved to Gu Yan’s ears to whisper, “I can keep you company this whole night.”

Gu Yan opened his eyes to look at him and asked, “The big boss doesn’t need to work overtime?”

“I just returned from overseas, so I need time to overcome my jetlag at least.”

Gu Yan immediately thought of those sneak shots from that magazine.

Was it just someone else who looked similar?

Or had he already learned the art of being in two places at once?

But Gu Yan didn’t say anything and simply laughed appropriately.

As natural as could be, Qin Zhiyuan hugged him by the waist, all the while instructing the chauffeur to turn the car around. This person then called to cancel the dining reservations that were made early in the morning before finally asking him what he wanted to eat for dinner instead.

Ah, this man had always been this gentle and considerate. Clearly, he was paying money to keep this lover, but he still insisted on doing everything right, so flawlessly that no one could find fault with it.

And he was this generous to every one of his lovers.

Generous enough to make people grit their teeth.

Gu Yan leaned against Qin Zhiyuan, grinding his teeth, thinking and thinking, and eventually actually started feeling somewhat sleepy.

He didn’t have many scenes today, but he had shot that one scene over and over again more than a dozen times and had even been submerged in ice-cold water for half a day, so he really had been tormented quite a bit. So even as his financial backer was still going on with those sweet words, he was already yawning repeatedly, falling into a hazy dream.

In the dream, he was once again filming.

He had to say a simple line of dialogue, but he couldn’t remember what it was for the life of him. The director was furious enough to smack the script right across his face.

Slap!

Gu Yan’s heart seized, and he immediately woke up to find that the car had long stopped in place and that the sky outside the window was also already dark, so dark that he couldn’t tell the exact time. He recalled what happened earlier and inwardly cursed, oh no, oh no, wasn’t this ruining my reputation, before he lifted his head and came face-to-face with Qin Zhiyuan.

This face couldn’t be considered provocative, but the facial features were proper, and when smiling, the corners of the eyes would slightly wrinkle, giving an extremely gentle appearance.

Anyone who just woke up from a nightmare, and who had been shivering from being submerged in ice-cold water, would be easily led astray by this gaze.

Gu Yan suddenly wanted to stroke Qin Zhiyuan’s eyes.

He usually had enough propriety not to act this presumptuously, but right now, he could deceive himself, using his half-awake state as an excuse to reach out his hand.

Qin Zhiyuan had sat with Gu Yan for several hours, and half his arm had been pressed numb, but he was still very patient, allowing the other to cover his eyes with still-cold hands. He asked, “What do you want to eat for dinner?”

Gu Yan sidestepped the question, “Half a month.”

No matter if he was truly busy or not, if he had truly left the country or not, they really hadn’t met for a full half-month; this was the truth.

Qin Zhiyuan’s eyes immediately darkened, and in a flash, he bit down on Gu Yan’s snow-white wrist. At first, he used some force before then softening up, slowly licking the teeth marks that he had just left, full of erotic intent.

Gu Yan felt as if his fingers were both numb and itchy, that even pain had turned into pleasure, and he moved forward to kiss Qin Zhiyuan.

The space in the car was far too narrow, which actually allowed these two to stick together even more intimately. Like primitive beasts trying to satisfy their instinctual lust, they tangled together without restraint.

Gu Yan was pressed down against the leather seats, a leg twisted at an unnatural angle as he bore Qin Zhiyuan’s repeated movements. The feeling coming from his lower regions was far too intense, making him unable to help but let out gasps and moans. He felt as if he was once again submerged in water, the push and pull making him feel practically about to suffocate. Within the light of their ferocious entanglement, he stubbornly reached out a hand and touched that person’s eyes before happily allowing himself to sink.

After they happily made love in the car, they returned to Gu Yan’s house and did it once more.

This time, Gu Yan took the initiative using Qin Zhiyuan’s favorite method, riding astride the person without restraint, twisting and turning his body as he played with himself, and shouting out while climaxing — he’d be as shameless as this person wanted.

After the matter finished, Qin Zhiyuan laid satisfied on the bed, catching his breath. “What is it? It seems like you’re especially wild today.”

Gu Yan smiled and returned with another question, “Does the big boss not like this?”

In response, Qin Zhiyuan once again kissed him, kissed him until the two of them began heating up, and only then did Gu Yan say, carelessly, “I heard that I recently lost favor.”

“You heard?” Qin Zhiyuan paused, his expression flawlessly impenetrable. “Who did you hear it from?”

Gu Yan lightly threw out a certain female celebrity’s name.

Qin Zhiyuan couldn’t help but laugh. “You even believe some rumors from a gossip magazine? I did eat a few meals with Miss Tang Anna, but it was all for the sake of work.”

“So that is to say, she isn’t your new lover?”

Qin Zhiyuan replied extremely skillfully. “Right now, the one in my arms is you.”

Neither confirming nor denying, leaving a wide swathe of ambiguity in the middle, to let people come to their own conclusions.

This had always been his style. Gu Yan understood that asking this much was already enough; if he asked further, then he would be crossing a line. Regardless of whether Qin Zhiyuan wanted to keep two lovers or twenty lovers, all of it had nothing to do with him.

After all, he was simply being kept.

His financial backer was generous and magnanimous, giving him both fame and fortune, so he should work even harder to keep in mind his own identity. He should smile and feign ignorance when appropriate.

Since he was already selling sex, how could he act so prudish about his virtue now?

The more Gu Yan thought, the funnier he found it, and he really couldn’t help but laugh out loud.

Qin Zhiyuan lightly stroked his sweaty back and asked, “You should be about done filming your current show, right? What other work do you have lined up afterwards?”

“A historical drama. I’m playing a cold-blooded assassin.” There was no need for much expressions, so it suited him very well.

“Zhao Xin is about to shoot a new movie. I read the script, and it seems a bit interesting. It probably won’t bring in much money, but it might win an award. Do you want to try it?”

Gu Yan didn’t even need to think, “No.”

“This resolutely?” Qin Zhiyuan not only wasn’t angry but also actually liked his attitude. “Because Old Zhao cursed you for being like a block of wood last time, you’re still angry?”

How strange, was he this tyrannical?

Why did everyone think that he would get angry at the drop of a hat?

“Director Zhao was only speaking the truth, so how could I be angry? But I act only in lead roles; do you think that Director Zhao would agree?”

Qin Zhiyuan remembered the absolutely furious expression that Zhao Xin had last time and internally thought, that’s true, it’s not likely, and said, “Then forget it. Let’s sleep.”

Having said that, he pulled the blanket over to cover the both of them and even specially tucked Gu Yan in.

Gu Yan didn’t have work until next afternoon, but since he slept in the car, he now found himself unable to fall asleep. When he looked up at the clock hanging on the wall, he saw that it was already three in the morning. He thus quietly laid on the bed, eyes wide open as he listened to the movements next to him. Only when he figured that Qin Zhiyuan was asleep did he drape on some clothes and get out of bed, heading to the living room to pour himself some water.

“Bzzz—-”

When he returned to the room, a cellphone began ringing and vibrating, even causing the pile of discarded clothes on the floor to move slightly.

Gu Yan was most afraid of picking up the phone in the middle of the night because it was most likely not going to be anything good, but he still gave in and bent down, feeling around in that pile of clothes before finally retrieving a phone — that turned out to be Qin Zhiyuan’s.

The caller ID said that it was Tang Anna.

If she wasn’t a new lover, then was she just a… close female friend calling in the middle of the night? When he looked at the caller history, of the dozen or so calls, all of them were with Miss Tang.

Gu Yan felt his head ache slightly. Looking out the window at the pitch-black night, he calmly waited until the phone screen dimmed. Then, he picked up each piece of clothing and folded them neatly before stuffing the cellphone in there as if nothing was wrong. Finally, he lifted up the blankets and returned to lying by Qin Zhiyuan’s side once again.

Qin Zhiyuan was awoken by the smell of food.

The space beside him was long empty, and when he saw that the sun was already bright in the sky, he finally remembered that he had forgotten to eat last night. Picking up the clothes by the bed and dressing, he then tidied himself up and went to the living room to take a look. He didn’t see the takeout that Gu Yan had ordered but instead heard some hustle and bustle coming from the kitchen.

Qin Zhiyuan walked towards the door and stood there, watching Gu Yan moving hither and thither and feeling somewhat amazed.

Gu Yan didn’t go into the kitchen lightly.

Since he was young, he’d always wanted to be a chef, and his cooking skills were incomparably better than his acting. Later, when he realized he wouldn’t be able to achieve his dream, he never again stepped foot into the kitchen. According to his own words, he was too lazy, but it was still apparent that some bittersweet feelings were involved.

His abilities in the kitchen had languished, but his movements were still skillful, and he didn’t expend too much effort before an entire table of food was ready. All of the dishes were those often seen in home cooking, and there was no need to speak of how delicious they smelled, but the most important was that bowl of verdant soup noodles. The soup was made with chicken stock, with fresh mushrooms and ham added, all giving off a thick and delicious scallion flavor. Even with a stir of the chopsticks, one couldn’t see even a trace of noodles; it seemed to be filled completely with tubes of scallions from beginning to end, and it was only when one bit down that the noodles would be found, stuffed into these scallion tubes. It tasted incredibly fragrant, leaving a rich aftertaste.

Qin Zhiyuan sat down and ate a few bites. Upon finding it incomparably delicious, he couldn’t help but ask, “Why did you make this today?”

Gu Yan also picked up his chopsticks and said, “I ate this last time and couldn’t forget it, so I decided to learn how to make it myself. It’s good that you’re here to help me taste test it.”

Last time he had eaten this with Qin Zhiyuan. When they had been traveling abroad, they had ordered this bowl of noodles at a certain restaurant, and at the time, Qin Zhiyuan had also thought it very delicious and praised it twice over during the meal.

He had remembered even this small detail very clearly.

Qin Zhiyuan felt his heart move and said, “It does taste very good, but I’m just worried that it takes too much time to make.”

It was a simple bowl of soup, but the soup stock was freshly made, and the noodles had to be stuffed into the scallions strand by strand. It required a lot of time and effort, and it was clear a lot of work had gone into it.

Gu Yan made a nasally sound in acknowledgment, not revealing his emotions in the least.

It wasn’t easy to attract such a big boss. He can’t be too doting but he also can’t be too neglectful, so how could he not take the time to consider things carefully? It was practically even more tiring than being yelled at during a shoot. Even if he wasn’t able to separate love and sex, he should at least be somewhat mindful of his role.

Fortunately, Qin Zhiyuan was very accommodating, and he finished that entire bowl of noodles cleanly, even saying at the end, with a tinge of regret, “It’s too bad that I don’t have many chances to taste the results of your craft.”

Gu Yan raised his head with a smile, but before he even had time to speak, he once again heard the ringing vibration of that cellphone.

Qin Zhiyuan had just placed his phone on the table, and now with a single look, one could see that Miss Tang’s name on it.

Gu Yan didn’t even try to sneak a peek, acting as if he hadn’t heard it at all. While one hand still held onto the chopsticks, he used the other hand to cross over the table and gently place it upon the back of Qin Zhiyuan’s. He maintained the smile on his face and said, blinking his eyes, “If I displayed my skills all the time, then it wouldn’t be interesting anymore.”

Qin Zhiyuan pondered over the implicit meanings in those words for a moment while shooting him a few glances before then also beginning to smile.

The call was once again not picked up.

When the phone screen faded to black, Qin Zhiyuan turned his hand over to hold Gu Yan’s, and his tone was flawlessly tender, “Do you still have a shoot this afternoon? I’ll drive you there.”