Chapter 86

Name:Futile Love Author:Heo Sarin
He didn’t reply because he felt so sorry for that. Even when he was on friendly terms with Yomin, he never went out for an outing with her.

“Though I told you I would free you, please don’t lie to me.”

“I’m sorry.”

“I don’t want to hear you telling me again that you’re sorry,” she said coldly.

She felt like she was swallowing thorns whenever he said something.

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“I guess you don’t want to see me,” he said.

“You bet.”

“You don’t need to go to the trouble of visiting me like this,” he said.

She stopped wringing the towel.

Putting down her hand holding the towel, she said, “They still think you and I live in conjugal harmony.”

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Of course, that was not true. This kind of hypocrisy was needed for Ruhae and Kyosul to keep their relationship. As he was well aware of that, he felt sorry for Yomin all the more, so he didn’t want her to visit his residency in the South Palace.

But Yomin also needed that kind of superficial relationship with him, such as it was. For she had to stay in the palace as his official wife even though he was not her lover anymore.

“Please come and see me at my residence in the Nambi Palace from time to time.”

“How can I have the nerve to see you there as I already lost face to you?”

“Nonetheless, I hope you can save my face and maintain my dignity. I don’t think that’s a difficult job for you.”

Actually, that was the minimal favor he could do for her, so that she could keep her status as his official wife.

“And it would be good to hide your relationship with the Crown Princess if you could maintain good relationship with me.”

It was a fact that they were aware of and didn’t want to bring up. Given the situation, Yomin didn’t hesitate to mention it now, let alone torment herself.

She didn’t know why she brought it up when she knew she would hurt herself because of it.

She put her hands into the lukewarm water with the towel.

She felt as if she was getting hot, too.

***

After she returned from Mt. Mokak, Kyosul stayed in the East Palace rather than her residence in the Dongbi Palace. Outsiders were convinced that she could hardly move because she had sprained her ankle while climbing the mountain, so Bipaan said he would take care of her directly instead of calling the royal doctor.

Court people could not believe that Crown Prince had her stay at his residence and cared for her in person. As Bipaan was known to be cold-hearted and brusque, they really couldn’t believe their ears. The rumours about his personal nursing of the Crown Princess spread quickly.

Was it because of that rumor that they soon forgot about the big fuss about Kyosul’s disappearance, the fact that she was found with Prince Ruhae on the Mok mountain, and talked about the newly found warmth in the relationship of Crown Prince Bipaan and Crown Princess Kyosul?

The reality was different because their relationship was far from cozy or sweet.

Bipaan’s residence was as cold as ever. There was even more tense and breathless silences than before because Kyosul was there as well.

Neither of them spoke, though.

He handled tax matters in the office and usually went to the Central Palace or the outer palace to take care of other matters, but he recently announced that he would digest his daily schedule in his office inside the East Palace while nursing the Crown Princess.

Deceiving the court people like that, he even ordered the court ladies not to come to his office in the East Palace. Accordingly he always worked in the office while Kyosul had to stay put on the bed.

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There was always a thin blind between his office and her room, and she was only allowed to stay or move inside the blind.

She felt like her mouth didn’t taste fresh as if she had thorns on her tongue.

She was sick and tired of lying on the bed, so she stood up, moved her feet, paced around her room and finally approached the blind that separated her room from his office. Sticking out her head, she looked inside.

With his back straight, he was sitting down in front of the desk. She could only see his back, straight in an upright position, his broad shoulders and his dark brown hair. Although she saw him at a distance, she felt stressed.

She couldn’t stand it anymore. She couldn’t afford to stay isolated in her room day after day.

She got cold feet when she approached the blind to give him a piece of her mind.

Vowing to speak out several times deep down, she was going to open her mouth when he spoke , “Do you have anything to tell me?”

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He checed the petition files and didn’t look at her.

Surprised, she stepped back. The sound of her urgent movement echoed through the quiet office.

She said, with a blush, “Well, I would like to ask…”

He stopped working but didn’t look back. She felt he was listening to her now. So, she got confident enough to ask, “I don’t know why you can’t…”

At that moment she couldn’t think of proper words to express her feelings. Although she felt that she was “confined” in the room, she couldn’t use that expression. She had been pondering over that expression since she moved to the East Palace. She regretted that she had not prepared the proper words in a situation like this.

“I mean, why don’t you let me out of this palace? As you are working in the office here…”

“I told the court people that I was taking care of the injured Crown Princess. They are supposed to think that you sprained your ankle during your recent hike in the mountain.”

“Ah…..”

When he mentioned her hiking in the mountains, she had nothing to say, but she found out belatedly that he confined her to the East Palace on the pretext of him nursing her.

Although she felt ashamed, she asked again, “Did you say you were caring for me?”

“Yes.”

“Why?”

Bipaan was speechless for a moment. There was silence again in his office, which was very much breathless and uncomfortable to her.

He suddenly stood up. Looking straight at her, he approached her. She was at a loss of what to do.

Lowering his head, he caught her gaze and looked right at her. He lowered his head a little more. Taking a deep breath, she stuck her head out. He slowly opened his mouth. She looked so nervous while she was looking at his thin lips.

“Because I’m punishing you now,” he answered curtly.

She was embarrassed, “What?”

But he turned his head casually and clarified, “You’re now being punished for having put me in a difficult situation.”

“Did I make you…?” she couldn’t finish her words.

He went back to his desk. She had no choice but to stand and look at him blankly.

She felt frustrated and upset.

Though she was choked with tears, she tried to subdue her troubled mind.

She kept repeating, “I have no other choice but to take it.”

She had to endure it because she couldn’t accept him while she loved another prince.

Ruhae was the first man that she loved since she was born.

She couldn’t openly love him and had to hide her affectionate feelings toward him.

And finally she was caught with Ruhae in the shack during their recent outing.

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For these reasons, she felt a sense of guilt toward Bipaan.

“I’m so sorry.”

She murmured in a feeble voice, which he could hardly hear. Without showing any reaction, he went back to his desk and resumed work as usual.

She also came back to the bed inside the blind and sat down. Tears came down from her eyes quietly.

‘Yeah, he has punished me for my actions that could have stood in his way.’

When she was found with Ruhae in the shack, she could avoid the embarrassing situation when Ruhae and Bipaan put out their wits. She knew why Bipaan acted like that, so she decided to accept his punishment without any resistance.

She had to endure the cruel punishment, which meant that she had to confine herself to the room all day long without doing anything or talking all day long.

Kyosul was able to leave the East Palace eleven days after she was confined there.

On her way back to her residence in the Dongbi Palace, she was accompanied by Bipaan. It was the first time they walked together since they were married.

As she left the room and took in the fresh air outside, she felt like she could breathe easy again. She had to live like a guilty woman while she was staying inside the room, but she went back to her normal lifestyle like before. She grew vibrant again.