"Mom, who's she," Alex asked, as he looked at Silas with a lot of emotions for a kid that's ten years of age, before lowering his head to look at his clenched fist.
Silas sighed when he heard Alex's question. Alex's thoughts were unknown to him but he was very familiar with the emotions he saw in his eyes, as he has felt the same emotions for a very long time.
'This is going to be tough,' He thought to himself.
Silas didn't know how to go about it. Should he just tell Alex the identity of his mother? What if he asks more questions?
He thought about it for a moment and decided to answer all of Alex's questions honestly, to the best of his ability. He felt that Alex deserves at least that much.
'Dad, you're the one who's supposed to be here, answering his questions.' Silas said to himself, internally and let out an inaudible sigh, as he looked at Alex.
"Your mom... Her name is Jasmine, Jasmine Kurt. I'm sure that you already have the general idea of what happened to her but I would like to tell you in details," Silas said and paused, as he continued looking at Alex.
It was like he was trying to get approval from him before he continued what he was saying, but he got nothing from Alex, as the kid continued to lower his head, looking at his clenched fist.
Silas saw this and decided to continue what he was saying.
"Your mom, she died when you were two years. It was breast cancer," Silas said, and paused for a moment before continuing, "She could have been cured.... might, but she was already in the late stage when we found out. There was nothing that could be done about it."
After her diagnosis, she requested they help her to live a few more months, so that she could take care of you, of us.
They succeeded and she was able to live for six more months, taking care of you, of the both of us with a smile on her face."
At this point, Silas eyes were also moist, which he found strange.
When was the last time he had tears in his eyes?
Silas cleaned the tears from his eyes as he took a pause and looked at Alex, who was now sobbing quietly beside him, with his fist still clenched.
When he saw this, Silas felt a pang in his heart like a sword was ran through it.
He stretched out his hands and hugged Alex's head, caressing his hair as he tried to soothe him.
Silas didn't say anything as he quietly continued to caress Alex's hair. He didn't know what else to say and his emotions to him, were bizarre at this point.
No matter how hard he tried, his eyes kept getting moist and he didn't understand why. He also had a stuffy feeling in his chest and his heart was filled with different complicated emotions, as past memories of Alex's mother flashes in his mind.
He remembered that day vividly. The day when she suddenly collapsed at home while taking care of Alex and how panicked he was.
Silas remembered how his twelve-years-old self frantically called the ambulance before calling his father.
He thought of the actions of his past and present self, his family previous and current situation.
He thought of the time that Alex's mom, Jasmine was still alive. How she took care of him like her own son, before and after she gave birth to Alex. How she always took care of him with a smile on her face even after her diagnosis.
How she took care of him like her own son, the same reason why he always called her mom and not stepmom.
Silas remembered the choking and deathly silence that enveloped the house the day she died. He remembered how his father sat beside her hospital and looked at her rapidly cooling body, and gave a smile, a smile filled with intense pain and sadness.
A smile that conveyed so many emotions that he couldn't understand at that time but now, he did.
He also remembered how he wanted to cry but had no tears to. He wanted to shout out to his mom, to wake her up but his voice failed him. He wanted to rush to shake her until she woke up but was held back by his father.
He remembered how the then young Alex looked at him with with teary eyes and said, "brother".
He remembered how he made a decision to take care of Alex to the best of his ability. But now that he thought of it, can he really say that he has taken care of Alex to the best of his ability.
Of course, he knew that there was no way he would be able to completely fill in the void left by their mom's absence, especially wth the later absence of their father in their lives, but did he do enough?
He thought of his past self and the decisions he has made, some he felt were smart and some that he knew were extremely dumb.
Silas thought of his non-existent social life, the fucked up relationships with he had with people and his messed up family.
He let out a deep sigh as he thought of all this.
"I was really stupid back then but have I really changed?" Silas asked himself, as he thought of his previous decisions.
His thoughts also drifted to the events that has happened after he got the system, and he couldn't but facepalm in embarrassment when he remembered some of his stupid decisions.
"I really have to change a lot of things about myself. I need to become better in every way and with every possible method," Silas said, as he made a decision.
His previous droopy eyes, now blazing with determination and the weary feeling he was feeling, now replaced with the regular energetic feeling he always had.
"LUNAR, complie all educational materials on every subjects and topics, into a written file and forward it to my laptop," Silas said, and got into a seating position.
In a bid to improve himself and make himself better, Silas decided to first increase his knowledge base.
It didn't take long before a large file that nearly made his laptop to lag, was sent by LUNAR.
Silas connected the Gear to the laptop and lay down on the seat, before telepathically clicking on the file.
Immediately after he clicked on the file, a massive document was displayed and Silas started speed-reading it, absorbing every knowledge and information in the file.