Chapter 483 - Thorn (5)

If Jack died, she would be left alone in this world, but she could not confess it to him. She was more afraid of the word ‘alone’ than ‘death.’ The fact that she would be left alone after he was gone was crueler to her. She smiled a lonely smile at him, and her lips, pressed by the weight of emotions, looked pale like a withered flower.

“I have done wrong to you so much until now, right?” Rachel asked.

“It doesn’t matter if you have done wrong to me or not. But it does matter what kind of wrong you have done to me. In fact, I can forgive all of your wrongdoings except for one,” he replied bitterly

“Would you please forgive me for that now? I’m not giving it up anymore. I’m trying hard, as you know. You’ve seen it with your own eyes.”

When she said that, he looked at her quietly. His sharp glance was not something she was familiar with. She wondered if his eyes in his saggy eyelids were really his because he had never cast such a stern glance at her. Why did his skin look so saggy?

“It’s been a long time since we parted, and I’ve hated you for a long time. I hated you every day, but at the same time, I have tried to understand you. Actually, I had forgiven you every day.”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean I have already forgiven you. As a matter of fact, I didn’t have the right to do so from the beginning. I’m rather grateful to you because you have given me such a right.”

“Oh my God… Jack!” she just called his name, not sure of how to express her feelings at the moment.

Jack smiled wearily and said, “Time is running out even at this moment. Every day when I have a dream, I’m peeking at death. So I can’t imagine what to do in the future. Today is shorter than I think, but I have less time than today. So, I find myself facing another day after I hold out today.”

“Don’t think like that…”

“I didn’t know I’d get by everyday, thinking like this. That’s why I’m looking forward to you all the more. I want you to show me something while I’m alive. I want you to revive our golden days so that you can show everybody what we old people can do. That we won’t just helplessly watch the sun setting.”

As soon as he was done talking, he grabbed her hand.

At that moment, she thought it was not him but her who had to hold his hand, but she had nothing to do but look at him placing his hand on hers.

He opened his mouth again.

“Lisa will endure it.”

“But she will endure it only when you can, Jack.”

“Yeah, you’re right. So, I’m going to fight her illness until she overcomes it. I want to ask you a favor, Rachel. I don’t want you to take care of Lisa who is fighting her illness at the moment. I want you to take care of her and Ella after she survives. Can you do that?”

“I’m busy. You do it yourself,” she said in an angry tone.

He smiled awkwardly at that as if he understood her feelings. She wanted to shake off his hand, but she couldn’t. Jack’s hand, trembling over her hand, was so weak as to break when touched. She never thought the day would come like this when his thick forearms felt so thin and skinny.

“You know what? The finale and the climax of your life have something in common. When you reach the finale and the climax, it’s time for you to climb down. I believe your finale won’t look shabby and miserable, Rachel.”

“Nope. I won’t have such a finale at all,” she replied in a quiet voice.

“Rose Island’s name won’t disappear forever. As you know, Daniel, you, and I haven’t had a life for something that will perish someday. So, don’t worry about it.”

He didn’t reply to her calm answer, but she enthusiastically kept talking to him like a little chef who explained his recipe to his boss.

“I’m going to host a chef contest at Rose Island sooner than later. All the chefs from its branches will come forward for this competition to be the next leader after me.”

“Well, our faces will be forgotten after that.”

“No, I don’t think so because they are going to follow our footprints.”

She glared at him. Like her, he was old enough because they were the same generation anyway.

Feeling sorry for Jack growing old, she said, “I’m not going to surrender to time. I can’t accept the type of life where you rely more on your memories than on creative thinking because I wasted too much time like that. So, watch me closely. There is no sad ending in my life. I won’t allow it.”

“Well, can you make it? At the end of the day, our days will be over.”

“You know what? Don’t forget that the end of your life is the moment you think it’s over. Even if we die, our death can’t get rid of us.”

When she said that, he burst into laughter for a moment. This was the moment she showed the best of her grits, and that was why he liked her. That was why he supplied bread for the restaurant run by her and Daniel for some time in the past.

Caressing his back with her hand, who barely groaned after coughing painfully, she whispered to him in a quiet voice, “Yeah. Maybe our days are numbered. After all, you will have no pain any longer, and your heart will beat no longer. But our cuisine will continue, along with your thoughts. That’s how I resist this world. That’s how I resist growing old. And that’s why I…”

She bit her lips before uttering, “That’s how we live our lives.”

<hr />

“Isn’t it hard for you?” Maya asked feebly over the phone.

Min-joon was about to ask the same question, but he didn’t.

Instead, he replied softly, “Of course, It’s hard. How can it not be hard for me?”

“I guess so. It’s the same here. Our kitchen staff is trying to look bright and cheer up, but they know it’s hard.”

“How about Lisa? Is she getting better?”

“Well, it’s hard to see her face these days because she is going to get the surgery quite soon. It looks like she is trying to spend more time with her family these days. Fortunately, Marco is good to work at her bakery. Otherwise, we would have made bread.”

“By the way, how is it going with you? Are you getting adjusted to your work as a demi chef?”

“Well, it’s really harder than I think. But I think I can endure it because I’ve learned so many things from you, Chef Min-joon. Thank you for helping me all this time.”

When she said that, Min-joon smiled silently. The two remained silent for a moment by not talking to each other. Both could read each other’s minds by being silent for a moment.

After all, he broke the silence by saying, “I’ll see you later, along with Ella and Lisa. Let’s have a meal or whatever.”

“Sure. See you later then.”

The phone hung up.

He looked down at the phone for a moment and then turned around. He didn’t want to indulge in a dark sentiment because he was afraid the moment he saw Lisa’s illness as a tragedy, she might end up having a tragic end. So he did not deliberately entertain any pessimistic thoughts. He didn’t think about it on purpose. It was funny, but he thought that if he did so, everything would be alright as if nothing happened.

‘But what if …’

What if the same thing would happen to him or Kaya?

Could he withstand all of this trial? Or would he try to turn away from it as if it was not a big deal?

Or would he boldly face the tragedy?

Min-joon could not answer, but he felt he could not endure it, so he felt more sorry for her.

Lisa would feel the same way. If he was faced with the same tragedy as her, she would only hope he could overcome it by himself well, which was pretty selfish in some respects.

Min-joon was consumed by that kind of thinking all day long while working in the kitchen.

That evening, he went out to the dining hall to serve a carpaccio dish with raclette cheese in person. At the moment, when he cut one side of the brown cheese baked well on the grill with a knife and scraped it down onto the lamb carpaccio, the customers uttered admiration, watching the cheese pouring in abundance like soup.

One of the customers asked, “By the way, can I have carpaccio like this? It’s originally a cold food, right? I’m afraid it’s going to be melted by the cheese.”

“That’s why I reduced its acidity when I made carpaccio. If you’re going to eat a warm carpaccio with cheese, it’s better to bring out the salty and savory taste more than the sour taste. I’ve adjusted the acidity just enough to refresh your mouth. And it’s just that hot. Of course, carpaccio that comes into contact with the cheese is a bit lukewarm, but meat doesn’t heat up so easily, as you know.”

“It’s amazing. How can you make a dish that’s both hot and cold at the same time? Isn’t it like one’s life? People go through ups and downs as you agree.”