CH 282

Chapter 282 – The Existence of a Saint

Now, it is not that it suddenly came out of the blue… but rather, it is a ten-day gap that we have been expecting. We have to spend these ten days being careful not to be underestimated by the opponent.

Incidentally, my companions this time were Ellen and Amalie-san (the Adol nostalgia group and the attendant), Seraphita-san (my assistant), the oni girls, Grande (my guard and escort?), and Capri and the other harpies (scout and bombing squads?). and twenty elite magic riflemen.

Although the number was small, the force was sufficient because of the increase in the number of golems.

In addition, the fort built near the town of Brignolph is of a reasonable size, so there is enough space for everyone to live comfortably. Water is also available from an unlimited water source, and I’ve set up a small farm on the extra land. I planted seeds and seedlings directly on the farm blocks I set up, so we’ll have several harvests before we leave this place.

Well, that’s fine. It’s not important. Now is the time for me to do a lot of thinking.

“Whew…”

Looking at the city of Brignolph from the top of the fort’s defensive wall. I don’t know the exact population, but it’s a decent-sized town. Maybe a little smaller than Erichburg. The population of Erichburg was around 10,000, so probably around the same.

“At least as big as that one city…”

The number of soldiers of the Duchy of Dihart and the Kingdom of Tigris that I killed and wounded in this war is more than the number of people in that city. When I think of it as just a number, it seems less real, but when I consider that the number is far greater than the number of people living in that city, something bitter rises in my heart.

I am prepared to go to hell together with Sylphy. In other words, I am prepared to trample on other people’s loved ones in order to protect myself and my loved ones. However, when I suddenly see a scene like this, I wonder if what I am doing is right. It makes me realize that I am the one who tramples on other people’s happiness in order to make myself happy.

“How do heroes come to terms with such a situation?”

Do they just let it go and say, ‘It’s war; it can’t be helped?’ Or do they forget all about it by indulging in alcohol and women? Or will they just forget about it all? What should I do?

“Kosuke.”

“Ellen, huh?”

I turned around to see Ellen standing there. Her crimson eyes were staring into mine.

“What are you doing in the dusk? It doesn’t suit you.”

“What kind of talk is that? I have my moments when I want to be in a dusky mood.”

Ellen walked up next to me, and we stood side by side, looking at the streets of Brignolph.

“So, what is troubling you? I’m a clergyman, so I can listen to you.”

“You act like high and mighty… well, you are high and mighty. You are a saint, after all.”

“Yes, I am a saint, a precious saint. I’m great.”

“Which one is greater compared to me, a saint and a prince consort?”

“How can Kosuke be greater than me, no matter what his position?”

The saint, with an earnest, serious face. She looked like she wanted to say, ‘What are you talking about?’

“I guess so. So, you’re going to help me with my problem?”

“Yes, I, the kind-hearted one, will guide the lost lamb.”

Ellen makes a smug face as she stretches her chest out. It’s hard to tell because of her outfit, but there’s a lot there. I guess Ellen noticed my gaze and kicked me in the shin. Okay, I’m sorry, please don’t do that. It hurts me.

“It’s totally disrespectful. You have too many worldly desires to call yourself a saint.”

“I’m sorry, Saint-sama. I will devote myself to you.”

“Do so. So, what has been troubling you?”

Since Ellen will see through the lie anyway, I’ll tell her everything that’s bothering me. I have long ago prepared myself to go to hell with Sylphy, but I still feel remorse for what I am doing at a moment’s notice.

“…I see; it’s a legitimate concern. I am a little surprised that even you can think like that.”

“Isn’t that awful?”

“Fufu, I’m just kidding. But it is a very difficult problem. If I were an ordinary clergyman, I would console you by saying that you did what you had to do…”

Then Ellen closed her eyes and prayed as if in thought. Ellen has a really beautiful face when I look at her like this. I was so distressed earlier, but just by seeing Ellen in front of me, all I can think of is how pretty and beautiful she is. It was obvious, wasn’t it?

“You have great power. Whether it is God who gave it to you or not, as long as you are with that power, you will continue to have a great influence on many people. That is the fate of those who have been given power by God.”

Ellen stared at me with her crimson eyes. She, of all people, has been given eyes that can see the truth and has lived up to this point in her life. The story has a real weight to it.

“I suppose you are lamenting the fact that you are now using your power to bring death and misfortune to so many people. That is proof that you still have the heart to care for others. That heart should never be lost.”

“But what is painful is painful no matter what.”

At first, the entire fortress and the soldiers of the Holy Kingdom were blown up with explosives. Then most of the survivors lost their lives in the darkness, devoured by Gizma.

Since then, I have made guns, bombs, air boards, and golems to kill ‘enemies.’ I have made them be killed. The soldiers who died must have been someone’s lover, son, daughter, father, mother, husband, or wife. I have killed them, had them killed, and spread misfortune around.

And that’s not all. I have let Sylphy take back the kingdom of Merinard, and as a result, the subhumans in the kingdom of Merinard have been liberated. However, this must have led to the destruction of the lives of the people of the Holy Kingdom, who had been living by using the subhuman people for their own good.

Now, there must be people who are unhappy here and there in the Merinard Kingdom. From my point of view, the people who have been using subhumans for their own good and leading a comfortable life are like unforgivable enemies, but from a different point of view, they were right. They were good. At least in the Kingdom of Merinard under the rule of the Holy Kingdom. I was responsible for destroying the lives of those ‘good’ people.

And now the invasion of the north. They acted to invade the Kingdom of Merinard. But was this what they wanted? I do not think that this is entirely true. There must have been a little bit of pressure from the Holy Kingdom. I am sure that neither country could have refused a request from a suzerain state with overwhelming national power.

I killed and wounded them without mercy. By the gunfire of the magic riflemen, by the bombing of the harpy bombing squads, by the overwhelming violence of the golems, and by the extreme light of the magic sparkling stone bombs.

Of course, I was thinking in my own way. This time, I decided to frustrate my opponent’s will to fight by showing overwhelming power from the very beginning to avoid a prolonged battle. For this reason, I dared to annihilate the enemy without mercy.

After all, I believe that only stronger violence can deter violence. You may disagree with me, but at least I believe so. Because the history of the Earth proves it.

It is not worth it to engage in a fight with them.

I believe that letting them know that is the only and absolute way to stop the exchange of violence.

There is no way to discuss things with someone who is going to attack you from the very beginning. First, show them your power by hitting them. Only after that can discussions be held. Of course, if someone tries to settle things with discussion from the beginning, it is best to settle things with discussion, but the world is not so easy. There are plenty of people who think it is quicker to beat someone to death and rob them than to discuss things with them.

That is why I have dyed my hands red with blood. I’m sure that the amount of blood that would have flowed in the end would have been less than if we had fought a long and drawn-out war. No doubt.

“Your sins should never be justified.”

Ellen’s words pierced deeply into my chest, which had been submerged in a sea of supremacy. With those words, my head instantly went cold.

“You must bear your sins. You should not reopen the door. Your hands are stained with blood. You have caused so much misery.”

While saying this, Ellen put her own hand on mine and intertwined her fingers with mine. Warmth poured from Ellen’s soft hand.

“But your hands, your power is not just about sprinkling death and misery. You know that. To atone for your sins, you must give life and happiness to others that far exceeds the death and misery you have spread. If you have killed 10,000 people and made 30,000 people unhappy, let 100,000 people live and make 300,000 people happy. I am sure you can do it.”

“You speak harshly, Saint-sama…”

“It’s natural. It’s easy to just comfort someone at a time like this. You can comfort them by saying, “Don’t worry, you have done everything for me; you don’t have to worry about anything.’ But that’s just a trick. Those are sweet, poisonous words.”

Her crimson eyes fixed on me.

“I do not intend to say such words to you. Sin is sin, and it should be rightly acknowledged and rightly atoned for. That is the right thing to do.”

“If I save someone ten times as many times as I killed them, ten times as many times as I made them unhappy, will that atone for my sin?”

“Only God knows. You can do it not ten times but twenty, thirty, or even a hundred times. Give it your all.”

“That’s hard.”

“Of course. I have devoted myself to you, so I expect you to do at least that much for me.”

Ellen then untangled her fingers from my hand and pulled herself away from me.

“Sometimes it is necessary to reflect. But don’t do it alone. You have many people you can talk to.”

“That’s true, though…”

I am sure that everyone else will comfort me, but I don’t think they will ever scold me like Ellen did. Maybe if they comforted me, I could forget my troubles for a time.

“You really need me, don’t you? It can’t be helped. Whenever you are troubled, I will show you the way. Be sure to ask me for advice. Is that clear?”

“I understand.”

I nodded my head. Because I somehow felt that my heart became lighter after Ellen gave me a sermon. It is simple, clear, and easy to understand that for every person you make unhappy, you should make more people happy.

“It’s good to be honest. Now it’s time for dinner. Amalie is cooking for us today.”

“I’m looking forward to it. Amalie-san’s cooking is simple but delicious.”

“As for me, I would prefer something a little more meaty or sweet.”

I follow Ellen’s back as she walks ahead of me, wondering what it would be like to be a clergyman.

I feel like I’m going to sleep well today.