CH 21.4

Cha Yiseok’s mother spread out on the bed in her pajamas and listened to the song. Her eyes, immersed in the melodies created by Cocaine, looked more calm than the last time. Clearly, she has a completely different reaction from Cha Yiseok and Cha Myunghwan. Cocaine had never imagined that things he had taken for granted in the past would be so thrilling. The tranquil aria retreated. Cha Yiseok’s mother stretched with a rejuvenated face as if waking up from a nap. She wrapped her hair around her fingers.

“I have slept well since the first day you came. It’s been a long time since I slept like that. Thanks to you, I only drank half. Whether that is because of your song remains to be seen.”

“Yes.”

“When you speak, your voice is different from when you sing. I thought it would sound calm and clean. I thought your voice resembled some kind of instrument, but it’s like a flute. I hate music, but the sound of the instrument is worth listening to.”

“Thank you.”

Cocaine laughed awkwardly. As she spoke, he thought, as expected, the mother and son were alike. He had told Hashish to stay in the car. He was already displeased about coming to this house, so he would probably be even more so in front of Cha Yiseok’s mother. Anyway, meeting his mother was a different experience for Cocaine.

“Sometimes, there are people who have a hard time at first because my songs don’t suit. It’s like a drug that doesn’t work for your body, but after that stage, you’ll see the effect. Do you have any special symptoms after that day? Headache, nausea, or…”

“Yiseok is the one who has a headache. His insomnia is also severe. That’s probably why he goes out at night day in and day out. I don’t know who that wanderlust takes after.”

Cocaine laughed bitterly. Would it be any better now? Coming home, he was expecting Cha Yiseok would be there, but he went against his expectations. He sang to him countless times over the years, but he couldn’t solve his headache. He assumed it was a psychological cause rather than a brain condition.

A psychological illness only relieved you from pain the moment you listen to a song, and unless the environment was resolved, it was difficult to completely heal. Moreover, it was difficult for a person who was exhausted to the root in a state of strong self-consciousness like Cha Yiseok to reach the bottom of his heart. As his mother lay facing the ceiling, she turned over and fiddled with her nails.

“I can’t because I have a meeting with the hostess of the affiliated company tomorrow, so come back the day after.”

“Yes.”

“Do one more song and go.”

“Then, this time, I’ll sing something you can listen to lightly.”

Cocaine started singing.

Once upon a dream…

We was lost in love’s embrace, There we found a perfect place,

Once upon a dream…

Cha Yiseok’s mother closed her eyes and savored the melody.

The sun was setting when Cocaine came out. He tried to check the time, but there was no phone. He had asked the boss to get him a phone today. Hashish said Yaba said he threw it into the toilet with his own mouth. Hashish dismissed those words as nonsense, but he did not doubt him. He didn’t want to question the matter any further.

Cocaine took off his mask and pushed his hair back. The wind envious of spring blew, freezing his sweat. At that moment, a figure, who was sitting on the natural stone in the garden, stood up, drawing a long line of shadow. It was Jang Sejun. He neither approached nor retreated, illuminated by the pink light.

Is it because they were brothers? They had an atmosphere that cannot be described. What should he do if Yaba denied the fact that his older brother was alive? What would he say if he told his brother he was sharing a room with Yaba? Shouldn’t he at least speak with Yaba’s permission? He didn’t know. His mood was messed up because of the Cha brothers, but even these brothers were a pain. Cocaine decided to approach him.

“I didn’t see you earlier, have you been there?”

As the distance narrowed, Jang Sejun was startled.

“I was listening to Chaewoo’s songs here. It’s so beautiful that I can’t even breathe…”

Blurred of words, his eyes were unable to escape from some wonderful emotion. Jang Sejun hesitated and raised his hand and pointed somewhere.

“There… sick?”

His fingertips pointed to the edge of Cocaine’s chest. When he looked up again, he had eyes staring at him quietly.

“Chaewoo didn’t see me, but I kept watching… It looked like it was hurt there.”

“…”

There was definitely a childlike side. It was too clean for an adult’s eyes, so he was wary but hesitant. Cocaine changed the topic with a faint smile.

“By the way, hyung, I think you’ve gotten a lot better than before. Sorry to say this, but… In the past, you could only speak a few sentences.”

“It’s thanks to Chaewoo’s songs.”

“Ah…”

He’d only heard Cocaine sing twice. No matter how many years had passed, he had improved so noticeably… Even if he didn’t have autism, he had to hear it for more than a few months to get a full recovery. Occasionally, even with the same disease, there were people who received a surprisingly effective effect even with a few healing sessions. It was just a case where the wavelength matched well with them. Jang Sejun took off his work gloves and rubbed his hands on his pants. He wrapped Cocaine’s wrist around and dragged him.

“I have something to show you.”

“What…”

“Follow me.”

“Where… W- wait… !”

He was startled. Although there was a difference in height, the strength of the grip around the wrist was enormous. He was dragged straight to the front door. Hashish ran from somewhere with a fierce face and ripped Sejun off.

“What is this? This bastard.”

Hashish grabbed Jang Sejun by the collar and pushed him to the gate. Surprised by the sudden attack, Jang Sejun changed quickly. His gentle eyes lit up for a moment. An alarm rang in his head. Cocaine grabbed Hashish’s hand.

“Come on, put your hands away! He’s a hyung I know.”

Hashish’s eyes contorted. Cocaine glanced at Jang Sejun and spoke again.

“It’s my hyung who lived in the same neighborhood when I was young. Hurry and apologize.”

Hashish did not erase his look of suspicion. Perhaps Jang Sejun’s appearance made him more wary. Moreover, if he found out Jang Sejun’s identity, he probably would cause a fuss. Hashish managed to correct his expression, but bit his mouth tightly. Cocaine stepped up.

“Hyung, I’m sorry. My friend must have misunderstood. He has a fiery personality, so don’t be too offended.”

Jang Sejun stared at Hashish with eyes without any emotion. He had eyes without impurities, as if living a while ago was an illusion. Cocaine left only a greeting for Sejun and led Hashish to get into the van. Hashish asked as soon as he took his seat.

“Are you late because of that bastard?”

“The madame kept asking me to sing. Can you please appease that temper?”

The car started. Cocaine fastened his seat belt and stared at Hashish. With an awkward expression on his face, Hashish said something else.

“Look. I said Cha Myunghwan is abnormal. He must be about to die. That woman might be squandering the family fortune too.”

Hashish sprinkled ridicule on Cha Yiseok’s family residence. Cocaine said with thoughtful eyes.

“Didn’t the boss say that he was still looking for another healer, so he was looking all over the country?”

“Apparently. Crazy bastard. I’ll kill him with my own hands one day.”

Castration retained the power. Whether this power would be immortal or if it would someday reveal itself was a matter of knowing until the end. The boss was probably preparing for that day. What would happen to him when that day comes?

Cocaine turned to Hashish.

“If the boss finds another healer… Would he be a bit different from me?”

“A different type? How?”

“I don’t know. A healer strong enough to take over the consciousness of the listener and cause poisoning. There may be many more hidden facts other than his father’s research.”

“There is no other voice more addictive than yours. Everyone who heard your songs has become an ardent believer. The violinist who was healed a while ago and Assemblyman Jang with a pierced stomach also sent you a present.”

“No, it’s not like that, but a voice with enough destructive power to destroy people’s minds…”

All those who were healed by Cocaine became healthy. Only those who are mentally imperfect have only destroyed themselves by deifying Cocaine. But it goes far beyond that, a voice that makes anyone go crazy just hearing it…

Hashish chuckled.

“Are you anxious?”

It was an unexpected question. Cocaine reversed the question.

“What?”

“Well… it just seems like you’re anxious. Don’t worry. Even if another healer appears, you are the best.”

Hashish patted Cocaine’s shoulder. He said it jokingly, but Cocaine couldn’t laugh. Was that so? He wanted to get out of this life, but he didn’t want to come down from this position. At first, he cursed his own abilities and felt skeptical, but the joy of seeing a dying man resurrected could not be replaced by anything. Hashish looked at Cocaine’s expression and said,

“No matter what happens, the boss can’t treat you badly. That bastard is terribly afraid of you. Your screams in particular. That’s why he put a chip in your head. Once upon a time, when you shattered the window of your dorm living room while fighting with the boss, the expression on that bastard was worth seeing.”

Hashish fiddled with Cocaine’s hair, whispering so it was inaudible to the thug in front of him.

“Chip, I’ll definitely take it out.”

People believe only in what they see. That blind faith blinds the eyes. Sometimes it’s a shackle, but sometimes it’s convenient. Hashish bent his upper body and entered deep into his gaze.

“Healers are probably chosen by God. A messenger who communicates with God with a beautiful voice and saves people. He heals the sick with his singing, but the formidable power contained in his screams is beyond imagination.”

Cocaine said with a smirk.

“It’s not impossible to break a window if you’re trained to have a powerful voice. You and other singers.”

“But no one has the power to smash a human skull.”

Hashish’s eyes lit up in wonder at its terrifying power. Cocaine looked out of the window, avoiding the choking gaze. The face projected on the glass was expressionless.

“Okay. Right. No one can have…”

A being who had been granted the privilege of going back and forth between heaven and hell, with the voices of both angels and demons…

Jang Sejun, who was trapped in the narrow space of the side mirror, became smaller and smaller. Black eyes like a puppy stood incessantly like a puppy that had lost its owner. In the blink of an eye, he disappeared like an illusion. The car that accelerated the speed ran over the bumpy past. He closed his eyes and his voice sounded like an auditory hallucination.

I, I… I’ll protect you… Chaewoo… Those who bully you… I…