CH 133

Translated by Tam

He is really a lonely old man, and although he looks like nothing special, this gatekeeper has been guarding the imperial tomb for a long time. 

So the former Empress trusted this person. 

I bent my knees slightly and looked at the gatekeeper. And I opened my lips.

“I want you to hand over something.”

One of the gatekeeper’s eyebrows went up.

“What does this lowly person have to pass on to you?”

“You know that.”

I twisted my lips.

“I want a letter that Margaret-nim left behind.”

Margaret.

It was the name of the former Empress. 

The former empress handed the last letter to the gatekeeper who would protect her tomb. If anyone is looking for this letter, please feel free to deliver it.

It’s been fifteen years for the gatekeeper now— and he seemed to be glad to see the guest who came to him, so he was slightly teary.

And he took a letter out of his pocket.

“I have accomplished my mission with this.”

He said, then gave me a crumpled letter. 

“Thank you.”

I was more grateful, but somehow I couldn’t say anything else when I saw the tearful gatekeeper. 

So I nodded lightly and was handed the letter.

“You’ve worked hard.”

Maybe the gatekeeper won’t be here the next time I come.

As I said, he’s done his job, and there’s no reason to work here anymore.

I took the letter and turned around. Then I saw Callian with a surprised expression on his face.

“That’s—”

Callian looked at the letter in my hand and frowned.

“This is the last letter from Her Majesty the former Empress.”

“You said you didn’t know where!”

He ran over and snatched the letter from my hand.

His face turned red, and he seemed absolutely excited. I shrugged my shoulders.

“It was a lie. That’s obvious.”

“You’re really—!”

Callian looked at me with his eyes wide open as if it was about to jump. He looked like he was determined to kill someone. I quietly avoided his gaze.

“How did you know?”

I knew he’d ask me this.

So I answered naturally. 

“The former Empress told me.”

Of course, in the original version, when Fleur came to the tomb of the former empress, she felt sorry for her, and the gatekeeper approached her first and delivered the letter, but I didn’t do that, so I had to lie like this. 

I took a half step closer to Callian, who was bewildered.

“This will be a very helpful letter to you, Your Highness.”

Then I clasped his hands and said. 

“I hope you will have a good understanding.”

Callian had a blank expression on his face, but I had to leave because I was done with my work.

So I bowed slightly and slowly got out of there.

Leaving behind Callian, who was still putting it in.

*****

Callian stands there blankly.

He sent Ophelia, who he had wanted to meet so much.

He just looks down at the letter in his grasp.

This is the third letter.

Maybe the last time.

Callian lowered his eyes slowly.

– This is a very helpful letter to you, Your Highness. 

– I hope you will have a good understanding

Ophelia didn’t see this letter. But how does she know the content?

Did his mother tell her?

There were questions, but this was a question to be considered later. 

Callian slowly opened the letter.

And he read it slowly, as if savoring the contents of the letter.

[So this is the last one. 

I can’t hold a pen anymore because I don’t have enough energy. So this is the last letter, so please understand.] 

The former Empress was weak by nature. After getting pregnant with Callian, it became even worse, so she died while giving birth to Callian. 

Knowing this fact, Callian had no choice but to be engulfed in sadness.

She must have been so sick that she couldn’t even hold a pen.

Callian sympathized with his mother’s pain and wanted to comfort her, but he couldn’t hold his mother’s hand, who had already left. 

He read the following, feeling the tip of his nose getting hot.

[I want to say. 

I’ve been told a lot to choose between you and myself.] 

This is the first time he heard of it.

Callian’s eyes widened.

[They said I would die if I gave birth to you. This is what I’ve been hearing since the first time I had you.

Nevertheless, I chose you.] 

Why? 

Just why? 

You should live your own life, why did you choose me?

Callian didn’t understand his mother.

But the answer to the question was in the very next sentence.

[I thought you’d be a much better person than me]

Callian’s hand trembled.

[Because I thought you’d be more popular than me and more amazing than me. I can’t give up on you like that. Because you’re an amazing kid.]

No, it’s not. 

He’s not now. 

The current self— was not very popular, nor was it great.

He was just a man who lived like a stream of water, had no sense of purpose or great ambition.

To be more precise, he’s crazy about women. From Fleur to Ophelia. He just wants to have those women, so he’s just turning on the lights. With no interest in politics at all—. 

Callian was ashamed of himself.

[The current Emperor is a tyrant.

Perhaps by the time you’re all grown up, he’s not as energetic as he used to be, but the Emperor’s basic cruelty will not change.] 

That’s right. 

The current Emperor is still terribly frightening. 

[I love this country]

Callian took a breath.

[So I want you to lead this country. 

Wise and warm.]

Callian closed his eyes tightly.

Ah! 

What the hell was he doing last time! 

He just turned on the lights in his eyes and walked around saying that he would find a wife and only a woman to be with him. 

He couldn’t be the son his mother wanted.

He couldn’t keep her will!

Callian was gripped by the overwhelming shame, and then he sat down on the spot. 

[My beloved son]

Callian’s eyes heated up. He read the following slowly.

[I trust you to do everything well. Because you are my son.

So please, I hope you will go and make your world.]

“….”

My world.

What is that?

What kind of world do I want? And what the hell was the world that his mother wanted—. Callian fell into confusion and could not control himself.

The letter now leaves only one sentence.

[I love you.] 

That’s what he wanted to hear so badly.

A tear rolled down Callian’s tightly closed eyes.

He misses his mother. 

He wants to pamper her by her side, and he wants to overhear her thoughts and do everything with her.

Maybe he was looking for women to fill his mother’s vacancy.

Now that Callian had a great realization, he has to act with the right subjectivity in the future.

‘The world my mother wants.’

He had to make it now.

To do that, he couldn’t live a messy life because of his emotions.

Callian lifted himself up, wiping the tip of his hot nose.

The two eyes of Callian, who were thus reborn, were shining like never before. 

******

“Whoo.”

In the carriage, I was breathing hard, sweeping my chest down.

I thought Callian would catch me. So I almost ran and got into the carriage.

But fortunately, Callian didn’t catch me. Maybe he was very touched by reading the letter.

If there is no change after reading the letter—.

‘There’s no reason to make Callian Emperor.’

Because that’s how stupid he is.

First of all, it seemed like I had to see how Callian came out at the next ball.

Please, I hope he changes.

So I wish he would stop paying attention to women and being obsessed with themselves.

I could only hope so.

It was then. 

“Excuse me, Madam.”

The coachman talks to me.

“What’s going on?”

“I received a letter when you were away earlier.”

“Is that so?”

I got a letter from the coachman.

The contents of the letter were quite long. 

The sender is—.

‘Jasmine?’

Come to think of it, it’s been a long time.

I went through the contents of the letter.

At a glance, it felt like she’s going to my mansion today, but it was written that her carriage broke down and she couldn’t move. She really wants to see me, but she has no choice but to make a promise for the next time. 

“Isn’t it telling me to pick her up?”

This cunning girl. 

I smiled and roughly folded the letter.

“Let’s go to Viscount Smith.” 

Then I said to the coachman.

“Because I have to adore cute and cunning things.”