CH 26

26. Between Instinct and Emotion

“…Mmm.”

She slept deeply today. Lasilia opened her eyes feeling refreshed after a long time. The sun was clear and the room was cozy. In a warm season like these days, she didn’t turn off the fire in the fireplace, so she felt a little cold at dawn, but today it wasn’t like that at all. The morning was surprisingly refreshing. Lasilia stretched herself happily. Then she noticed something shiny by her bed.

“Hmm? What is that?”

When she removed the blanket that was blocking her view, she could see the glitter properly. 

It was the Emperor’s blonde hair.

“…hmm?”

That was to say, the Emperor was sleeping with only his head resting on the edge of her bed while sitting on the floor.

“Why… Ah, the blue moon.”

They were supposed to sleep in the same room. Lasilia naturally knew that she would watch over the Emperor suffering from mutations with the shadow knights, just like the day before. 

But she herself waited for the Emperor and she fell asleep first…

‘…Is that why he just slept next to me?’

It was something she didn’t quite understand. Yesterday, too, there was obviously a blue moon. Lasilia moved her body silently as she drew closer to the Emperor. There was no sign that his bones had sprouted and re-entered, and there was no bloodstain. She saw instead that he was impeccably dressed. With that outfit, she couldn’t figure out why he was sitting on the floor in such an uncomfortable position.

‘It’s strange…’

Lasilia tilted her head.

‘What happened while I was asleep?’

So, the sleeping face was just beautiful. At first she was just looking for traces of last night, but now it’s just aimlessly staring.

‘…What is human?’

As she looked at the Emperor’s face, she almost forgot how much time had passed. She laughed bitterly at the fact that even the prophetess herself was seduced by his beauty.

‘At this rate, I’ll forget why mirrors weren’t allowed in the Prophet’s room.’

It meant to be wary of what was visible. The eyes were gullible. The prophet had an obligation to see the truth beyond what was seen.

“…Anyway, I have to get up.”

The Emperor was still in a deep sleep. She didn’t know how long he’s been doing that, but if he stayed like that, his body would hurt here and there. Lasilia got down from her bed and pushed the Emperor onto her shoulder. It didn’t make sense for her to carry this physique by herself and lift him to bed, it was best to push.

“Groan,”

She did everything in her power, but it was impossible to lift the Emperor into bed. Lasilia, who quickly gave up her no-nonsense task, rather put the Emperor on the floor. She took a pillow for him, put it under his head, and covered him with the blanket. At this point, she seemed to have done all she could.

It was at this moment that Lasilia turned her body, thinking that she would be changing from her pajamas to her underdress before her ladies-in-waiting arrived.

“It was less covered in blankets, this way.”

“…?”

The Emperor was looking at her with clear eyes, wondering when he fell asleep.

Tok, he made a sound by tapping the floor with the tips of his fingers protruding from the covers.

“…So?”

“I was afraid I might have to cover you again.”

Lasilia’s eyes became a little frightened.

“So what?”

“Then I didn’t go.”

“…”

“…I don’t like this.”

The Emperor raised his lying body. It was an appearance that could not be seen as someone who had been asleep so soundly that he would not even know if someone touched him just a moment ago.

“Were you pretending to be asleep?”

When Lasilia asked in a voice with a drop in temperature, her golden eyes shook slightly.

“…a little.”

“What was the reason? Were you going to watch me do something?”

“No, I didn’t think of that.”

When Lasilia stood still with an expression asking if she would believe it, Lescal hurriedly explained.

“It is true that I was sleeping. When you opened your eyes, I awoke too. However…”

“However?”

“Because you keep looking at me.”

“Is that why you pretended to be asleep?”

“I don’t think you hate it.”

“…?”

The Emperor’s answer was very surprising. Lasilia was briefly surprised by the unexpected answer.

“You never looked at me like that when I was awake. You never covered me with a blanket or anything. so.”

“So…?”

“It was good.”

“…”

Lasilia made an impression involuntarily. It wasn’t because she hated it, it was because she was embarrassed.

‘Such a small thing…’

It was unfamiliar to her that he pretended to sleep with his eyes closed because he loved such trivial things. She knew that the blue moon intensified his instinct to need a companion. She confirmed with her own eyes how desperately he needed the existence of his companion for the blood of the demons.

‘But this… It’s different.’

There was no room for emotions or intentions in that instinct. It was an instinct that literally could not be controlled. The Emperor’s words that he liked little things sounded a little different from Blue Moon’s instinct. Not knowing exactly how, how much, or why it was different, Lasilia felt unnecessarily strange.

“Yes… That’s right.”

“Don’t you hate it when you open your eyes and talk?”

The Emperor asked with a slightly stiff face. Perhaps it was because she had heard that, but now that expression read that he was carefully examining his mood.

“…Not necessarily.”

Lasilia tried to calm down the agitated feeling. She didn’t know what it was, but it wasn’t good for her to feel more than she needed for the Emperor.

“What I hate is when Your Majesty makes difficult words or demands. There is no such thing as falling asleep.”

“Tell me specifically.”

“It’s like asking me to put the blanket back on you just now. Since you are awake, isn’t it something you can cover yourself with the blanket again? Asking me to do that seemed like a deliberate attempt to annoy me.”

“Absolutely not.”

Lescal quickly got up and stood in front of Lasilia. It was an act that came out of a hurry, but it was very difficult for humans to properly understand his actions. Lescal moved too quickly and without warning. The gold eyes were brilliant, but the expression was few. All humans saw was the expressionless face of Lescal, who had suddenly approached her.

“I will never bother you. If you are suffering because of me, it means that I made a mistake without knowing it. When that happens, let me know. So, allow me to ask for your forgiveness.”

“…”

And Lasilia somehow felt like she had realized how to understand Lescal’s expression. She could see that he was misunderstood and nervous.

“Then.”

“Please do so. Please let me know.”

“…All right.”

Lescal let out a small breath. It meant he was relieved.

“Thank you in advance.”

‘…It feel serious.’

This time Lasilia sighed. She wasn’t feeling good. Looking at his sleeping face and thinking he was beautiful, she was now reading his expression and accepting his feelings.

‘You know that shouldn’t be the case.’

The outcome of the Emperor and herself had already been decided. She herself was struggling to avoid that ending. If she understood each and every emotion like this, she would eventually love the Emperor, and the Emperor would kill her like that.

“Looks like there was no mutation yesterday.”

Lascilia moved her feet back and turned her body around.

“Ah… Come to think of it.”

The Emperor was also asleep, and it seemed that he had no idea how the night had passed. 

Anyway, it was fortunate. Didn’t the fact that there were no mutations mean that the blue moon would soon be over?

“Then may you go back to your room now? I will wash now.”

“…”

The Emperor slightly twitched his lips and looked this way. It was embarrassing to see him with an expression of regret.

“…That should be it.”

“Yes, Your Majesty.”

After a quick greeting from Lascilia, she headed for her bathroom as if she were running away. The Emperor’s expression, which she could understand now, remained as an afterimage in her mind, which was very difficult.

* * *

“Your Majesty the Empress. Today is the day of discipline.”

She opened her mouth with the Marquise of Farshad standing behind her and her seven ladies-in-waiting like knights. The expression was unusual. Perhaps it was because she was able to read the very small expressions the emperor showed, and the clear expressions like those of the Marquise Fashad were easily visible to the eyes. It was the expression that he was determined to do something.

“Is it?”

“Yes, Her Majesty the Empress, stand this way. You better go to the bathroom before the smoke disappears.”

The Marquise, outwardly pretending to be extremely polite, bowed to her and beckoned her.

“I will help you undress.”

But her purpose was blackmail. The Marquise clearly knew that the Empress was hiding the signs of her disappearance, so she deliberately called all of her ladies-in-waiting and prepared a situation in which she would take off her clothes. It was a provocation, wondering if she could reveal her secret so easily.

“Oh, I didn’t say that.”

Unintentionally, however, Lasilia had prepared herself for the provocations of the Marquise.

“What do you mean, Her Majesty?”

“From now on, the princess of Shryden will attend my bath.”

“Yes? What do you mean by that?”

A blood clot stood on her neck at the bewildered Marquise.

“The princess of Shryden. Is there such a person in the Empress’ palace? We have never even heard of that name.”

“She received His Majesty’s approval yesterday and was appointed as the lady-in-waiting of the Empress’ palace.”

“Yesterday. How could you do that without saying a word…”

The Marquise’s voice began to tremble. Lasilia was obtuse with things like this, but the ladies-in-waiting of the Empress’ palace were microcosms and pinnacles of society. The influence of the Empress’s eight aides, among them the first lady-in-waiting, the Marquis Fashad, was enormous. It was natural for her to be shocked when a stone was suddenly rolled in the world of solid power they had built.

“Should I tell you in advance about choosing who will serve on me? It couldn’t be.”

“Your Majesty the Empress. There are etiquette and customs in the palace.”

“Are you saying you’re going to discuss etiquette and customs in front of me?”

Lasilia put on a stern expression. She was in fact the one she had as a prophetess, but not too different from her Empress.

“I don’t know who the Empress is.”

The Marquise’s complexion turned pale. But here she was, the Marquise had quite a lot to lose if she backed down. They knew the Empress of Cartagena all too well.

“Ha-ha-ona… How could someone else entrust such an important job as attending a bath? That should be my responsibility as the first lady-in-waiting.”

Unfortunately, Lasilia was not the Empress of Cartagena.

“Then the princess of Shryden must be the first lady-in-waiting.”

“Yes…? Her Majesty, how can you say such words so easily?”

“Even if you look at your status, isn’t that right? Princess Shryden is the only daughter of the duchy.”

The Marquise involuntarily raised her voice.

“What are you talking about! The Duke of Shryden, there is no such family in the Empire!”

Lasilia grinned whether or not the Marquise cursed her. It was because she heard a cute voice beeping from behind the bathroom door.

“Come in, princess.”

“Uh, uh…? Yes? Did you already know that I have arrived, Your Majesty the Empress? Then I will go in.”

Yvette, who hesitated for a moment as if embarrassed, opened the bathroom door and entered.

“Greeting Her Majesty,” she said. “It’s a very, very good morning!”

“Beep!”

The ladies-in-waiting saw Yvette entering the bathroom and were astonished.

“You…!”