[v2] Chapter Twenty – In which a busy Ark does a few things that needed doing around Goblinhome so he can be lazy.

[v2] Chapter Twenty – In which a busy Ark does a few things that needed doing around Goblinhome so he can be lazy.

It was the day after Rushk and I had our first intimate encounter and there was no sign of any goblinization happening to her. Stella said there weren’t any profound changes right away for her either, so it was just a waiting game to see what, if anything, happened. I had a laundry list of things that needed to get done around here, and decided that much like my goblin wives, the sooner I took care of things, the sooner I could be lazy.

First on the list was remodeling the shit-pit.

This was something a long time coming. I had to recruit a few of the girls to help me out—primarily Glace and Mint as they had more efficient magic available to them that would make pressure washing the funky shithole a breeze. I had Grotte help me carry the wooden toilets that Toy had constructed in her workshop and gave her something to hammer down in the process.

I had smoothed out all the now mostly clean walls and floor, created two urinals for me and Vera (as well as Button) who for whatever reason, stood up to pee. Five toilets in total had been made by Toy. Three were adult sized and two were more child-friendly. The scary crevice I was always afraid I might slip and fall into was sealed. A pillar with a hole in it was erected to redirect waste from the upper floor down into the murky pit below. A hole was also made to direct some of the stench outside, which was a resounding success.

Also, suspiciously, both Mint and Glace knew how to use the toilet without me explaining a single thing. I figured I was going to have to hold a class on how to use it, but I guess not. Flushing wasn’t something configured into any of the toilets. The truth is, I would need a toilet made of vernir metal to enchant anything like an auto-flushing mechanism into it.

However, along with the shit-pit remodel came some nice shelving for storing extra leaves that Lily is in charge of gathering for wiping purposes, and some space for Berry to put a basket of her potpourri to spruce the place up. Even a few special sconces for placing torches, not that I needed them anymore, but they were still used all the time around here. I made a water fountain for washing hands and filling a small bucket of water that would be poured into the toilet to wash away any excrement left behind, and a small bucket was put between each wooden toilet that had easy-to access leaves.

Honestly, I was quite proud of myself for getting this done. I also paid my girls well for their much-appreciated help, issuing ten standing each to them for a job well done. It wasn’t all done, though. Vera and I would try our hand at configuring some kind of light panel in the future. But for now... Goblinhome was just a teeny bit more civilized overall.

Next on the list was Magic Lessons. The students today were Jewel’s daughters, Ruby and Jade. As well as... Prima.

Ruby and Jade were born with affinities in their mana, Fire and Wind respectively. Having an affinity meant that rather than having neutral mana which needed to be converted into one of the governing elements of Runic magic, their mana was non-neutral, and so using any magic outside of their affinity took extra steps to perform and would be more taxing.

Neither of them cared, really. They were just fine using their element of choice, and so I had to come up with a few creative spells to teach them. Also, like a certain video game from my past life, the fourth installment of an endless fantasy series, they... had the ability to cast spells in sync.

Yeah. Not going to lie here, it’s pretty fucking badass to watch a couple of small gobbos whip up a fire tornado out of nowhere with little effort. But putting it out can be a chore.

As a father, I believe my little girls should know how to protect themselves at times. Which is why I taught them how to keep undesirables away.

“Ready, girls? Know what to say if someone you don’t know asks you to go with them?”

Both of them nodded.

““We didn’t say we’d go with you, what we said was FIREBALL!!””

Jade put up a magical circulating wind screen around both of them while Ruby conjured a fireball and dropped it right in front of them both. In a single moment, there was an explosion of fire that wrapped around them and torched their immediate surroundings while they stayed safe within the wind screen, taking no damage from the heat.

“GWOAH!”

“HWEE!”

Crow was the kind of goblin that if she were a human, would probably be the one for me.

Hmm... the last thing on my list is... well...

Orga Lush.

While she’s a kind and friendly sort, she’s also old. Like... menopausal cougar old.

Still, a war-bride is a war-bride.

I had secured a jar of... something experimental from Berry earlier, and brought it with me when I visited her cave.

“Oh, a gift for me?”

Orga Lush took the jar and gave it a sniff, a tuskless smile invoking itself a moment later.

“Smells delicious.”

Orga Lush set about pouring us both a cup, but I requested only a small amount of the fruity liquor in mine. We carried on with some small talk before she began to undress herself. She, like the other orcs, had huge breasts, though hers sagged a little. Unlike the others, there was almost no place on her chest that didn’t have markings. She also didn’t have any nipple piercings, and when I asked about that, she said when her tusks fell out she removed those as well, to signify that she wasn’t really trying to impress any future orc husbands. She was curious as to whether I wanted her to pierce them again, but I said it was fine if she kept things as she wanted.

She did regale me with some stories involving her breast-markings and she even had a small scar on the inner part of one breast from when she had begun learning how to tame and accidentally got scratched. It was neatly decorated, and I found the breast-art they did to be quite cultural. Like one of those nature documentary series that I’d watch at night when I had insomnia in my past life, about some indigenous tribe on a southern continent or some remote pacific island.

Getting it on with her was actually quite enjoyable. In that department she wasn’t all that much bigger than Grotte, which saved me from a lot of unintentional psychic damage. She was also a bit like Pear, quite open to going with the flow. Even being twice as old as Krushka, her libido may as well have been that belonging to someone half her age.

We went at it many times, stopping only to eat with the others before I wound up returning with her to her cave-hole and spending the night fornicating our brains out. How I didn’t get crushed while laying next to her, I’ll never quite know, but come the morning, I found that she had changed into Rushk.

Well, she had woken up early, and let Rushk take her place.

“War Chief... no... Husband... about... yesterday...”

Seems she had felt like she had done something wrong and wanted to... correct things between us. So, seeing there was a chance to make some goodwill between us, I did my best to show her a good time. All in all, I had an extremely productive day and I felt that things were going well.

That is, until I noticed something.

Her ears were jutting out... just a little...