Chapter 15: Catastrophe (4)

Chapter 15: Catastrophe (4)

[Hena’s POV]

I didn’t want to believe it.

I blinked several times, trying to deny what I had seen.

I hoped I had seen wrong.

Everything should’ve been a grim hallucination of this wicked year. It would have sufficed if it were just a bad dream.

I would have apologized over and over again, hoping that once he came to his senses, the young master would be well.

But nothing changed.

The young master was still bleeding profusely, and Razen, covered in wounds, was supporting him.

I hated this cruel reality.

My throat was choked up, and I could hardly speak properly.

Gulp, gulp.

Only after pushing through my constricted throat did something resembling words finally escape my lips.

“Ah, no... Not the young master. Please, no!”

His injuries were too severe.

It had to be the throat, of all places.

The throat through which Master Terion’s precious breath and beautiful voice once flowed.

How painful it must be for him.

He never showed it, suffering even from the smallest wounds.

He was also the type to fear blood so much that he would never look directly at his injuries.

I could see Master Terion’s hands trembling.

I wanted to hold them if it were alright, but I needed to stop the bleeding.

It felt as if the world was turning upside down. The air around me choked my breath, heavy with despair.

Did he notice how I was feeling? The young master’s hand moved slightly.

Yes. He was still alive.

I managed to steady my heart.

Let’s do what we can now.

“Razen. If you can move, could you call the lady? She must be hiding in the basement. There are bandages and herbs nearby.”

“Okay. I’ll be quick.”

Should I wait for Razen to return?

I couldn’t afford to. Not even a moment could be wasted. I had to attend to the young master’s wounds immediately.

I ripped my garment.

Fortunately, it tore into a usable shape.

I immediately started bandaging the wound on his nape.

Again and again.

I wrapped and pressed it repeatedly.

Once Razen and the lady returned, and after I entrusted Razen to her,

I kept cleaning the young master’s blood and trying to stop the bleeding, even as Razen was being bandaged.

All the while, the relentless red blood soaked my hands.

No matter how much I wiped, the blood seemed endless.

I had to somehow close the wound, but it was too large and deep.

The pain seemed to radiate visibly.

Suddenly, a pained groan escaped the young master’s lips.

My heart sank.

The air around felt heavy.

I couldn’t lift my head.

“The blood, the blood won’t stop. No, what do we do? Our young master... Ah, oh... sob.”

I shouldn’t cry. Tears would only blur my vision.

But I couldn’t hold back.

The guilt of staining my hands with the young master’s blood was unbearable.

Unable to treat him like this, I wiped away my tears.

“Hena.”

“It’s all my fault. I’m to blame for everything.”

“Why would this be your fault, Hena? Don’t say such things.”

No. It’s my fault.

Honestly, I didn’t hate life here.

I hated that you, young master, had to be in a place like this, but that was all.

Preparing meals for you every day, falling asleep in the bed next to yours, it made me happy.

The thought of always being with you excited me.

It was like the scenes I had dreamed of. A dream I shouldn’t have wished for.

I imagined us living together in a little house, having a cute child, and occasionally smiling and locking eyes.

So this must be my punishment.

Because I dared to dream such wicked dreams.

“Stop crying... Ah. I’m a bit cold.”

“Please, please. No. I don’t want this. Young master... please.”

“I’m sorry. Razen, please keep your promise.”

“Don’t worry and rest. I haven’t forgotten the promise.”

“Thank you...”

The young master let go of my hand.

Emotions overwhelmed me. Razen and the lady were watching as I broke down crying.

I cried so much I didn’t even realize when I had collapsed.

My eyes were swollen and painful.

When I woke up, the young master was lying peacefully. His eyes closed.

Not breathing.

I was by his side. Razen and the lady were nowhere to be seen.

It seemed like they had stepped out for a moment.

Had they gone to gather wood?

In the Grand Duchy of Eilencia, they cremate the bodies.

Razen was unwell, so he could have woken me, but perhaps he was being considerate.

He knew I loved the young master. Maybe he wanted to give me some time alone with him.

I tidied the young master’s hair.

It was something I always did, but today his hair felt stiff. Normally, I would make a shampoo from steeped petals, olive oil, and egg yolks.

That would soften it right away. He was always such a fine man.

“Yes, young master. I meant what I said to Razen. I loved you, but being by your side was enough for me. But now, I can say it.”

His skin was pale, and there was no warmth.

Still, it felt like there was a little warmth left, so I hugged him tightly.

“I love you, young master.”

I finally said what I wanted to.

“I loved you more than anyone else in this world. I loved you even though I knew it could never be. Every night I cherished every word you said to me. I would have loved you until my dying day.”

It was ironic.

The words I most wanted to say, why did I have to say them at the moment I least wanted to imagine?

“I really don’t want to let you go, young master.”

A world without you seems too cold.

I want to see your occasionally clumsy expressions.

Sometimes dignified, sometimes childlike, sometimes mature. I can’t live without the various faces you showed.

“I could not be connected with you through love.”

But, young master.

Do you know?

I still have one last chance to be with you.

“Just wait a little longer.”

I’ll be following you soon.