CH 99

The days were fairly quiet, the base wasn’t so busy, and the two would sometimes see each other, but again to a point, not doing much else. Lin Han listened to He YunTing and wore gloves after the other man told him to, was careful not to touch him, and wore clothes tightly when hugging.

The two didn’t mention this matter again for a few days, as if Lin Han wasn’t curious at all and quietly accepted this fact.

The people and research related to Gu Miao were all destroyed by He YunTing, but some of the samples weren’t named, and there was no way to find the Omegas that had been used as experiments but were unaccounted for.

And why after three years, this experiment had restarted again, or was it that these Omegas were the remnants of the last time, just to be found and used again?

But the good news was that Xu Zhiheng had been focusing on Qi JiaZe all this time, and his efforts had not been in vain. Qi JiaZe’s recovery speed was getting faster and faster, and now had reached the level of being able to communicate with people very slowly and normally.

Although his reactions were still slow, his words were gradually becoming more organized.

When He YunTing arrived at the lab, he saw Qi JiaMu, who had been allowed to visit him, struggling to say something to his brother, while he was struggling to reply word by word. As he got closer, he heard Qi JiaZe say, “Brother, I’m fine.”

He saw Qi JiaMu kept thanking Xu Zhiheng, hardly saying anything else but thank you, and the other smiled very lightly, as if the hard work during this time, day and night, wasn’t worth mentioning.

He didn’t know what mood he had been in and if he didn’t stop himself three years ago, Lin Han could be in this situation now. He YunTing’s heart suddenly tightened, and felt uncomfortable. He finally also opened his mouth and said to Xu Zhiheng, “Thanks.” 

It was obvious that Xu Zhiheng was more concerned about He YunTing’s thanks, his tired face regained a little bit of energy, but he could still see the weariness of the day and night, “It’s nothing.”

Xu Zhiheng paused, wondering if he was remembering some teenager who had been left behind on V Proton, and glanced sideways at Qi JiaZe who was struggling to speak.

After a moment, he stood up, as if he wanted to say something to He YunTing emotionally, and extended his hand to shake the other, but He YunTing habitually dodged and took a step back to avoid it.

When Xu Zhiheng saw that He YunTing was still wary of him, he didn’t feel embarrassed and even smiled politely, “I’m sorry for causing you to be misunderstood because of me, and I’m very sorry for making you defensive of me.”

He YunTing didn’t say anything, nor did he approach Xu Zhiheng again because of these words, but just nodded as if he understood.

“By the way,” He YunTing suddenly thought of something, “there’s a question I want to ask Professor Xu.”

Xu Zhiheng lifted his head and waited for him to ask.

“Since you have researched this… Do you know when his glands were destroyed? Just infer it alone.”

Xu Zhiheng didn’t expect him to ask this question, his face froze for a moment before he said, “A few years ago, preliminary estimate, at least two years or more.”

“Thank you.” He YunTing asked no more questions and left the lab. He originally wanted to head to the base, but it was getting late again, and just when he was considering where to go, his communicator lit up.

Lin Han’s voice sounded normal, “I’m off duty, where are you?”

He YunTing spoke truthfully.

“Are you… are you free?” Lin Han paused, “I’d like to use your flying machine.”

All the transportation in the core area was very convenient, if Lin Han proposed that he wanted to use the flying machine, it was most likely the same as the last time he went to the zoo in Q area; he wanted to go to places outside the core area.

“I am.” He YunTing thought about their current situation and hesitated for a moment before saying in a deep voice, “Do you want Lu AnHe to send you, or should I come myself?”

“It would be good if you could come to keep me company.” Lin Han’s tone lightened a bit and said, “Change your clothes and don’t wear a military uniform.”

“Okay.”

He YunTing didn’t know that Lin Han wanted to come to this kind of place. This wasn’t the first time he came to a civilian area, but the first time he came here with a different mood than even before.

“Today is the anniversary of my mother’s death,” Lin Han said naturally and in a calm tone, “I wanted to come over to see her and bring you along.”

Lin Han wore gloves, and even through a layer of silk fabric, he could still feel the warmth of He YunTing’s palm. He pulled He YunTing off the flying machine and the two of them made a detour before walking to Lin Han’s mother’s grave.

Even the cemetery in the civilian area was more modest than the core area, and there were few caretakers, so as long as they bought it, they could be buried here, along with countless other people who were once ordinary but vivid.

There was no picture on the woman’s tombstone, only the inscription with the date, and the epitaph she wrote for herself long ago.

[Even from despair, rise with tenderness, hope, and love.]

On it was in the woman’s crisp handwriting, and alongside the text was a white rose that she had loved most in her life. It wouldn’t wither, just quietly sealed in the special material of the tombstone, quietly open, accompanying her long sleep.

He YunTing looked at the words for a long time in silence.

She finally failed to leave the despair behind, or choose to leave in a long torment. But fortunately, she still left behind her tenderness, hope, and love.

He YunTing’s eyes softened and bowed very deeply to her.

Lin Han bent his eyes and smiled, looked at his mother, and then at He YunTing. He suddenly had an uncanny feeling. It was very amazing, how he would have never thought he would actually bring He YunTing here.

Like there was some kind of ritual, he saw He YunTing who bowed deeply, and there were so many things he wanted to tell him little by little.

He YunTing words were few, but it didn’t matter, and he could slowly tell him everything.

“Mom said she didn’t want to be buried in the core.” Lin Han spoke, “She said it was too crowded and boring.”

The core area was filled with memories of spoiled young masters who usually called out “mother”, but Lin Han still had the civilian area habit and would very smoothly call “Mom”, in respect outside, inexplicably it was more sticky and intimate.

He recalled little by little, “But she didn’t stop me, let me take the test to the core, and said at least in that place, Omegas wouldn’t be too crowded, and I could live a better life. She told me to do whatever I wanted to do, to go wherever I wanted to go, and not to have any regrets about anything.” Lin Han tilted his head, “Now that I think about it, I guess it’s still kind of how I’ve always lived.”

He tried to drive a mecha, but after trying, he found that his body couldn’t keep up, but he ended up doing a job he liked, so he didn’t have any regrets in the end.

“Mn.”

He YunTing responded and looked at the face of the youth in front of him. There was little change from three years ago. He was still gentle and soft.

Lin Han saw He YunTing raise his hand, seemingly to touch his face, but finally let it go because of heavy concern. He heard He YunTing say, “You can do whatever you want.”

Lin Han’s heart moved, “I’ll show you the place where I used to live. It should still be there.”

—

The place was naturally not as well organized as the core, and even when they walked to less crowded places, there were still loitering Betas staring at them, or more directly, some Omegas leaning on the railing at the side of the road in their loose clothes, seeing the tall and mysterious people, and even trying to giggle and come up to them.

Fortunately, it wasn’t far, the two soon arrived at the house where Lin Han used to live.

He YunTing unexpectedly saw this was already considered a rare and nice place in the civilian area. The surroundings weren’t that bad, and it was even more rare that this place was quieter than the noisy cluster buildings, not like in the civilian area, but like the outer ring of the core area, with little disturbance.

“I don’t come here often, maybe once or twice a year.” Lin Han said, “But my mother bought the house, and I’m not short of money, so I’ll keep it as a memento.”

He YunTing remembered that Lin Han’s mother had not actually gone out to earn a living to support herself and her son since she came here, yet in every way there were no economic concerns, seemingly just to escape the core area and the nightmare she once had.

Although Lin Han only occasionally came, he would regularly call someone to clean, so the house still looked neat and clean.

“Next time I’ll bring Grr over to see, there’s still a mecha model in the room that I collected when I was a kid, and I don’t know if it will like it.” Lin Han said, picking up a model in his hand. He seemed to talk a little more than usual today, starting from his childhood, such as when he would inexplicably cry when he first read, such as when he had been in the civilian area for so long, his mother was worried about Lin Han’s safety and never let him go too far away by himself, and whenever she was free, she would bring him along.

“Wasn’t I quite petulant?” Lin Han laughed halfway through, “My mother never said that about me, but I always felt I was quite petulant.”

“Maybe it’s because I haven’t suffered much.” He muttered to himself.

He YunTing listened to him quietly, his eyes serious. After a few minutes, however, Lin Han suddenly stopped, his lips pursed very lightly, and called the other man’s name.

“He YunTing,” Lin Han asked, touching his face with his gloved hand as if inadvertently, “What you don’t want to talk about is related to me, the Burning Blood Project, or my mother, right? I can guess.”

He YunTing was a little surprised, but ultimately didn’t say anything.

“Anyway, it’s just these few things, isn’t it?” Lin Han said calmly, “I had doubts before, my conditions obviously fit so well, so why did nothing happen to me? I don’t mean to make a wild guess, but anyway… I’m sure you won’t easily forget about me.”

Lin Han tilted his head to look at him, and even deliberately leaned closer to create the illusion that he could only rely on He YunTing, “You said the decision was in my hands. So I want to know now, okay?”

“Okay.” Whenever Lin Han said these four words, it was obviously a normal discussion, but He YunTing could always hear the meaning of pampering.

He saw He YunTing’s expression finally change.

Before waiting for the other to speak, Lin Han continued, “I know you must not want to tell me. But you have to know that I’m not the same as before.”

Lin Han came closer, his breath brushing the side of He YunTing’s face, close enough to bite into his earlobe and learn all about the dusty past at the moment of skin-to-skin contact.

“You won’t leave me behind.” Lin Han used an affirmative sentence, as if he was just reminding himself that this would never change.

“So I can’t help it.” He said as he reached out and wrapped his arms around the other man’s neck. “There’s no way I can stop spending time with you only point-blank, like I did before. There’s no way I can stop kissing you or controlling the desire to get closer to you. I can’t help it if I have to keep touching you through a layer of gloves.”

Lin Han’s eyes seemed a little red, it’s not that he didn’t know what he might know next, he was actually so nervous that his palms were sweating, luckily he was wearing gloves so He YunTing couldn’t notice.

“I know I’m useless, don’t laugh at me. Just tell me, okay?”

—

“Do you want to?” He still seemed hesitant and talked a little more than usual, saying again what he had said at the beginning, “All the decisions are in your hands.”

Lin Han opened his eyes hard to hold back the tears that were about to fall out, and wondered if he had succeeded, and if he would now look ugly.

“If I can, I hope you never have to know this.”

Always live in the cleanest world and always face only the sun.

He YunTing walked step by step in front of Lin Han, he was quite a bit taller than the other person, covering Lin Han with his shadow He only looked down at Lin Han for a moment before reaching out his hand, holding the back of his head with his five fingers and running it through his hair.

He YunTing was very stupid before he regained his memory. He didn’t even know how to talk to Lin Han properly. Not knowing that his inner thoughts turned out to have caused him a misunderstanding, sluggishly took the snacks Lu AnHe had hidden in his aviator over to curry favor, tentatively asking if he wasn’t angry anymore.

He wanted Lin Han to stop crying, to apologize hand over fist as he had just returned from V Proton, or to subconsciously lean over and kiss the other man’s tears dry.

His feelings weren’t rich, most people have a cold stereotypical impression of him, thinking that years of polishing has turned him into a cold weapon, only to get closer to know that he was still standing in the same place, sincere and would never change.

It was a pity no one would come near him.

He took the gloves off for Lin Han with his other hand, and then held Lin Han’s five fingers firmly. He knew he would see those images, but he didn’t know how Lin Han would feel after seeing them.

Lin Han’s hair was soft and supple, and He YunTing half forced Lin Han to his shoulder, so that his face was buried in his arms. He said, “Go ahead and cry.”