Human beings are indelicate creatures, and they are never beautiful. I really feel that way when I go out into society.
If you drink alcohol, someone's bad words are rampant, and everyone talks about this and that with a good face. When I was a new graduate, I thought that the stress of work must be quite serious.
The amount of cigarettes I smoked also increased. I have smoked since I was in college, but I consume more cigarettes than ever before. Recently, smoking has become more and more separated from the rest of the workforce, which makes it harder for me to be a smoker. In fact, at work, there are certain places where I can smoke. It's better that they haven't banned smoking altogether yet. Now when that that's happened, I'm finally ready to go on strike.
I haven't had a girlfriend for a while. The girls I've dated since I started working didn't last long. It seems that the reason "I'm busy" doesn't apply to girlfriends.
It's not that I'm not interested in the opposite sex. But I didn't want to make a girlfriend. It would be too much trouble. That's why I'm convinced that I started chasing after idols at my age.
I was attracted to a five-member group called Sakura Romance. They may not be a national treasure, but they are well-known to a certain extent.
One of them is Momoka Aimi, whom I call Momo-chan. She has shiny black hair and bright eyes. At 27, she is become the oldest member in the group, and if you consider her as an idol, she seems to be on the verge of her due date.
Still, I thought she was the prettiest and wanted to support her. I have no sympathy for her, saying, "She works hard even though she is the oldest." But in fact, she is leading the other four in performance.
But she has not been walking on the elite road. As she said in an interview, she is proud of the fact that she has worked harder than anyone else. This gave her confidence and was the driving force of the group.
Then, she was suspected of having a passionate love affair.
No way, I thought. No, no, no, no, please not Momo-chan! I told myself that, but it was all over the Internet news and on SNS. Because of that, I even bought a weekly magazine, which I usually don't buy.
I regretted when I reading it. The picture of her holding hands with a man in a suit. The man was covered with a mosaic, but the woman did not look like Momo-chan. In fact, the picture was so different from her on stage that I really didn't want to admit it.
So I took a day off from work. I couldn't say it was because my idol was suspected of having a passionate affair. I used a temporary illness for the first time since I joined the company. In fact, I don't have the mental capacity to work. Now, it's easy to make the visitors snapping at me.
I didn't feel like doing anything from the morning, and before I knew it, it was nighttime. I didn't think I would be this depressed.
It wasn't that I was in love with her. I was not what you would call an otaku in love. It was more like the discomfort I felt when I found out that my acquaintance, whom I had been rooting for, was doing something "female". I'm sure there are better analogies, but this is the best I can do with a brain that has stopped thinking.
It's contradictory, but I think it's good for idols to fall in love. They are at an age. They usually fall in love a lot and experience a lot of bitterness. That's how they find their mates. It is human nature to want to do it when it is forbidden. It's just like quitting smoking.
But still ...... I had never thought of a passionate love only for Momo-chan. ...... I got up my body, which had been lying down for a long time, and stretched as tall as I could. My bones rang as hard as they could.
"You want a cigarette......?"
Standing up from the bed, I find a discarded weekly magazine on the table. It's in view due to Momo's carefully unfolded pages.
[Sakura Romance Momoka Aimi hot love? Smiling at a convenience store after a concert in Fukuoka]
I went all the way to Fukuoka. ...... It's kind of sad, or maybe it's just a little bit unwilling.
Momo-chan says she likes guys in suits, so most of the guys in Momo's group wear suits. It's simple, really. I was the same way.
Speaking of after the concert, there was a woman who dropped her purse in front of a convenience store. I stopped her and handed it to her. I wonder if I looked that suspicious. ......
Suddenly, I looked at the photo.
It looks like a man in a suit and Momo-chan are holding hands. But it also looks like they are handing something to each other. What is it? I can't stop sweating. Maybe, but no, I don't think so, but maybe.
"Isn't that me in this picture?"
I'm about to be involved in something terrible. I had a feeling.