Chapter 52

(Arc 2 begins!)

Currently, I am in the bathroom.

Why?

Because I need to clean myself, that is why. Just because I am a dispensable character does not mean I should be dirty. I still need to wash my clothes and my hair, you know.

To be fair, taking a bath is the only thing I can do besides delivering my lines. It is also one of the few things that can help me eliminate dark thoughts. The soothing warm water does help with negative emotions, I tell you. I would have lost my mind if I did not put my head under the water a few times.

Like all the other rooms of Han's mansion, the bathrooms are vast and well equipped with all kinds of things. You would be surprised how big the bathrooms are compared to my place. Just the bathroom is already as big as a third of my house. Then again, what do I expect?... Why do I have to compare? But that much is to be expected for Han's mansion. This place has everything he needs since he is the protagonist. It even has its own gym somewhere!

Thanks to all of the convenience, the owner, namely Han, does not need to find anything since these places will always have the things he needs. When Han misses something, Rachel will find them or buy them immediately.

Rather than a childhood friend, I think Rachel is more of a caretaker.

Or a mother...

Anyway!

Ranged from simple and ordinary items such as a shower, a bathtub, and soaps, to those of...interesting usage such as anal cleaner, a massage table, and aromatic oil, these bathrooms have it all. They even have those inflatable beds so one can have their procreating activities on them while cleaning. If I remember correctly, their respective name is Nuru massage.

In all seriousness, there is no need to go into details. I would just simply say Han was very...um...well taken care of. It is his house, so I have no right to judge what he does inside it and with whom. After all, I am but a freeloader.

I do have one question for him, though. Does water really work as a lubricant? I heard it did not. In fact, it should have been much harder to have sex while you were under the shower or submerged in water. Yet the sex scenes did not seem to have anything related to that. I thought they would have difficulty maintaining the friction or balance, but no. Han was able to do anything and everything without slipping and sliding.

Probably eroge physics. I do not know for sure...

But I have to digress.

At this point, you should know that this is not the first time I have gone inside one of Han's bathrooms. In the past, I had to use this place to wash and clean myself. Albeit there was always the imminent danger of being found out by the yanderes, I managed to escape unharmed about 70 percent of the time.

I would say a 70 percent of win rate is an acceptable rate.

I think...

Back when I still had to sneak in to take a bath, I always had to keep a low profile. Knowing their schedule was one thing. Expecting the bugs and the changes was another. Even though the girls had a specific time and place for their sex scenes, it was a must to try my best to keep my intrusion unknown to them.

Especially when Han kept on living longer, it would become harder to keep track of every single one of them all the time. The more he survived, the more characters were introduced, and the more chaotic the mansion would become. Therefore it got exponentially hard. In addition, Han's decisions could change the story drastically. For example, choosing to go down Rachel's route would lead to a sex scene in the morning after the first night. On the other hand, not choosing Rachel will leave the bathroom relatively easy for me to access. Sometimes, the difference between a murder and a kiss on the lips is only one sentence.

However, things will probably be different from now on. I will not have to be like a little thief just to take a shower anymore!

Bless whoever made this possible!!

*Shaaaaaa*

My ears can hear the soothing sound of running water. Slowly but surely, the bathtub is being filled up. Because it will probably take a while, I make my way toward the sink to brush my teeth for the first time ever. I honestly do not know how to do it right, so I will just wing it until I feel my mouth is clean.

Oh, wait...

I forget that I do not have a toothbrush...Can I ask Rachel if Han has a spare one around this mansion? Is that rude? I slept here last night, had delicious meals cooked by Rachel, and now I am again bothering her because of a toothbrush.

This is honestly shameless...

What if I just leave my teeth like this?

No... It should create cavities and stuff.

Now that I have teeth, a tongue, and probably a digestive system, I should take care of them. At least, I do not want my breath to smell like a sewer or have tooth cavities. There is a hospital in this world, but I seriously own no money, so if I develop something like a disease, it will be nasty. The only way for me to escape a severe sickness is death itself.

Wow. I never expected having your own organs would be this troublesome. Back when I did not have a mouth, I did not have to care about these trivial things at all. Since I lacked the need to eat or go to the bathroom, my life was free from all the basic instincts of a human!

Not anymore...

*Guuuuuu*

Eh?

My stomach is rumbling out of nowhere. From the inside of me, I can not explain this with words, but it feels like some gas bubbles are popping. Is it because of hunger? That is not likely since I just had breakfast with the gang a few minutes ago. And I felt a clear distinction between hunger and fullness thanks to that breakfast.

Then there are only two more options left.

Using my incredible intellect, I have deduced that a fart or some stool is coming out.

Call me C-lock Holmes!

*Guuuuuuuuuuuuu*

Ah! Crap!!! It is getting worse!! I need to run!

As I hurriedly make my way to the toilet, I suddenly feel this is annoying. For real, though, what if this happens all the time? Do I have to run to the restroom every time like everyone else? I used to feel envious of those who could do their fundamental physiological activities.

Today, I stand corrected.

Oh, wait. Let me fix that sentence a little.

I sit corrected.

*Prrrrrrrt*

Ah, shit! Here we go!!

...

...

...

That felt good.

Crazy, I know.

I would rather not talk about what I just did there. So please, feel free to fill in the blank space yourself. All I can say is I somewhat understand why the girls would agree to do anal with Han. It does make some sense.

Also, there is good news after pulling my pants down.

My penis has grown bigger.

Do not ask me anything. I do not know how or why. Just accept it.

*Knock knock*

"C, can I come in?" I can see Rachel's silhouette.

"You'll need someone to wash your back." And also, my girlfriend Laura is there with her.

Strangely enough, Kurokawa is not on the outside. I wonder where she is right now.

Wait, why am I even expecting Kurokawa to be outside? She joined us the whole day yesterday, so I am probably getting a bit over my head. Having two yanderes on my behind is already a bad sign. If Kurokawa joins the team for any god damn reason, then I may just kill myself as soon as possible.

*Knock knock*

Hearing their knockings, I politely decline. "No, thank you. I can clean myself perfectly fine. By the way, is there a spare toothbrush outside?"

"Yes." Laura and Rachel answer at the same time. Through the blurry glass door, I can see their silhouettes looking at each other after that.

"Then could you please put the toothbrush right at the door for me?"

Rachel says. "Come out, and I will personally give it to you." Her voice appears to be seductive, and that gives me a sense of danger.

"Don't listen to her, C." Laura defends me.

That is the class representative for you! She is always cautious. Thank you, Laura! If not for you, I would have given in to temptation. Laura is definitely worth the title: my voice of reason.

"You should let me in instead!"

My voice of reason is tainted...