Volume 9 - CH 3

Men of Culture Presentation

“Anyway, this is Yoru-san, my new part-timer. I heard she’s Hideyori-kun’s classmate but this should be your first time meeting Tatsuyuki-kun, correct? He’s Touno Tatsuyuki, a benefactor of Seiko-chan and a master to Hideyori-kun.”

“Nice to meet you.”

“Yup, nice to meet you too.”

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Master introduces Yoru to Tatsuyuki-san.

The fact that she already acquainted herself with Seiko without me knowing is irritating though…….

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“You’re……Akechi’s master?”

“Yeah. It seems my teaching did come in handy when he got attacked by a Gift Hunter the other too.”

“G, Gift Hunter…….? H, Haa!? You were targeted by the Gift Hunters!?”

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With a lot of bad blood between her and the Gift Hunters according to the game story, Yoru pressed me for an answer.

I don’t think she has any grudge against that clumsy Gift Hunter though……

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“One did come after me but that Gift Hunter was Uematsu Yurika you know.”

“Yu, Yurika…..? Eh? She’s a Gift Hunter!?”

“She already quit though.”

“…….Eh!? She actually did!?”

“Oi, Earth to Yoru!”

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Perhaps it came as a huge shock for her that Yurika who was living in the room next to her in the school dormitory and her fellow stalker was a Gift Hunter, Yoru looked clearly distraught.

After all, Yoru probably loathes the Gift Hunters even more than she hates Akechi Hideyori……

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“They said the 5th Academy was built on the land where a disaster dragon lay asleep. It’s kind of an urban legend that the lingering malice attracts the bad sorts toward that place.”

“The land where dragon sleeps? That’s stupid……”

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Tatsuyuki-san tells me and Yoru about the academy in an explanatory tone.

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“Perhaps so. But for some reason, the crime rate does abnormally spike up only in that area. This legend has been around for more than 5,000 years after all.”

“That sounds like a background setting for a game’s location.”

“Who counted that 5,000 years thing anyway?”

“Who knows? It’s a fact that the rate of Gift-related crimes in Japan is the highest near the location of the 5th Academy. Well, scary isn’t it……”

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Both Yoru and Master interjected Tatsuyuki-san’s story with a skeptical tone.

……well, she’s right on the spot that it’s a game’s setting though.

Rather, the game’s plot itself was only steered forward with crimes.

Hideyori this, Hidyori that, Torture this, Torture that.

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“Also, this is according to the information I’ve gathered but Hideyori, you got caught up in a HALF DEAD GAME recently too right? The legend might unexpectedly be true, don’t you think?”

“H, HALF DEAD GAME? What’s that? I’ve never played it before you know?”

“…….Ha?”

“Is it a FPS game or something?”

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I don’t have that kind of B-movie-ish game at my place and I don’t think a movie with that kind of plot even exists.

So what exactly is this HALF DEAD GAME?

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“You didn’t even notice huh…….well, forget it.”

“Y, Yes…….”

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Tatsuyuki-san said it like I simply forgot about it.

Now I’m curious what kind of game it was……

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“HALF DEAD GAME…… HALF DEAD GAME!? Wait a minute!? Someone organized a HALF DEAD GAME at my school!?”

“I just heard about it from my acquaintance…….it seems the culprit turned himself in and the number of casualties was zero.”

“A HALF DEAD GAME with 0 casualties…..?”

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Yoru looked dumbfounded.

Seeing the two of them speaking about HALF DEAD GAME, something that doesn’t make any sense to us at all,  Master and I turn to look at each other in puzzlement.

It’s like our wavelengths just don’t align.

However, Tatsuyuki-san turned toward me and smiled.

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“Alright, the confusing story is over. Anyway, Yoru-san. Can you start by tending to our 2 customers?”

“Ahh, so that’s why you didn’t serve us coffee.”

“She has to practice after all.”

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When Master said that to Yoru with a smile, she nodded and ran up to Tatsuyuki-san and me.

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“May I take your order, sir?”

“The usual please.”

“Mine will be the usual E.”

“Certainly. The usual and the usual E, correct? Right away.”

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Yoru jotted down our orders with a ballpoint pen and headed straight back to Master.

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“They ordered the usual and the usual E, sir.”

“What? You have to be clearer than that when taking orders from customers you know……..”

“Y, Yes, sir…….”

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Leaving Master, Yoru gets back to me and Tatsuyuki-san.

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“May I take your order again, sir?”

“The usual.”

“The usual E.”

“Understood. The usual and the usual E, correct? Right a-……HEY!? You can hear this too right, Master!? What is this, employee harassment!?”

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Seeing how Yoru reacted, Tatsuyuki-san, Master, and I were holding back our laughter.

We were messing with her on purpose.

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“Hideyori-kun will have espresso and Tatsuyuki-kun’s will be cola float right.”

“There’s no way anyone would get that right! I just started here okay!”

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*Bang* Bang* Yoru slams her hand on the desk in front of me.

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“Come on now, don’t intimidate our customers like that. I’m willing to forgive you if you tell me what Hideyori-kun was doing at school yesterday though.”

“After school yesterday, Akechi, Takeru, and Yamamoto had a secret meeting in a classroom…….”

“Hey!? How did you know about that, Yoru!?”

“Hideyori? Quiet down and listen okay.”

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Master and Tatsuyuki-san brilliantly smile at him.

Ahh….., there’s no stopping this huh……

That thing yesterday.

It was something incredibly embarrassing.

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—————-

“Gentlemen, to commemorate the coming of Golden Week, I’d like to announce the beginning of our 15th Men of Culture Presentation.”

“We’ve been waiting for this, Akechi-sensei!”

“This is gonna be a good one, Akechi-sensei!”

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My opening statement was lauded by applause from the two idiots.

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“Can you two not put me on a pedestal?”

“It’s not that I particularly admire Akechi-sensei though.”

“Neither do I…….”

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With Takeru and Yamamoto treating me as the connoisseur, I became both the organizer and moderator of the Men of Culture Presentation.

Incidentally, no woman is allowed at this gathering.

It’s a shame but I had to bar Emi and Risa from participating in this event (It’s not like I’m thick-skinned enough to tell them that we’re holding something like a Men of Culture Presentation in the first place.)

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“Today’s topic of discussion is from Takeru-kun, so please, take it away.”

“Yes, Akechi-sensei!”

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Saying so, Takeru presented Yamamoto and me with a piece of paper with [Who has the Ideal Breasts] written on it.

The three of us gaze at the paper before looking at each other and nodding.

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“Alright, I will go first.”

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Yamamoto raises his hand.

Slightly nervous, he starts his presentation.

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“I think Hasegawa Hinano’s are the best!”

“Wait, who!?”

“I think I’ve heard that name before but who is she exactly!?”

“My girlfriend.”

“Girlfriend Brag!?”

“Go to hell!”

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Even while being booed by Takeru and me, Yamamoto coolly took it.

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“For reference, please submit your photo evidence.”

“Got it.”

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3 images were sent to our 3-member RINE group, [Explode Riajuu].

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“……isn’t this on the smaller side?”

“Hold your judgment, Master Juumonji. Please take a good look. This here is clearly a beautiful specimen.”

“Hmph, in terms of shape, Risa’s is prettier and hers is practically the bomb you know.”

“Objection, Akechi-sensei! This man’s sister complex is clouding his judgment!”

“Overrule.”

“Siscon is okay but girlfriend bragging is not!?”

“I declare Siscon not guilty, Girlfriend Brag is Guilty though.”

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Siscon is acquitted, Girlfriend Brag, on the other hand, is a great crime.

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“She blushes just from hand-holding you know!? Don’t you think that’s cute!? Hasegawa Hinano is the best, Your Honor!”

“No, Juumonji Risa is still superior.”

“Don’t just compare my girlfriend to your little sister. My girlfriend is the best, right Akechi-sensei?”

“I declare you both guilty.”

“Wah!?”

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Unfortunately, Takeru is also guilty this time.