Chapter 2

Chapter 2

Son, eat a lot.

The golden-brown grilled mackerel glistened with the colors of the sea. My mother meticulously removed the bones and placed a thick piece of mackerel in my rice bowl. Her face was wrinkle-free, the face of a young woman who had lost her husband early and single-handedly opened a fish stall at the Namhang Market.

The moment felt too precious to be a mere glimpse before death. I wanted to hold onto it forever. Wasnt this the mother who devoted her life to me? The image of my young mother was more beautiful and noble than any actress Id seen.

Son, are you crying?

My mother looked at me with a worried expression. I managed to swallow the tears welling up in my throat and shook my head. What a foolish son I was, causing worry even on my mothers face in this fleeting moment. With a grunt, I lifted my spoon and barely pushed the mackerel and white rice she had prepared into my mouth.

But whats this?

The sensation

As the savory taste and the fullness of the white rice went down my throat, the vividness of the taste was too real to be an illusion. Although it was supposed to be a brief encounter, it was incredibly delicious, as if I was again at my mothers table. Thats when it happened.

Huh?

Only then did the rooms scenery gradually come into focus. The wallpaper of the cramped space, which seemed to only contain the two of us, was old and worn with mold here and there. The lamp hanging from the ceiling also had one lightbulb removed to save on electricity. It was unmistakably the tiny room in Yeongdo that I had shared with my mother since middle school. It was a perfect replica of that time.

Mom?

Her face, lovingly gazing at her child, overflowed with vitality. It seemed as if I could touch her if I had just reached out. Gathering my courage, I did just that, and her skin, still untouched by sunlight, felt real. My mothers eyes were wider than ever. She wondered what was happening, seeing her usually irritable son stop eating and crying while tenderly touching her face.

***

I had returned.

How it happened, I couldnt say.

I was sure I had decided to commit suicide by hanging.

But when I opened my eyes, I found myself back in my 14-year-old self.

Had my past life been just a nightmare?

Or was it a prank by the gods?all new stories at n0ve/lbi/n(.)com

Either way, it was fine. The fact that I could experience this moment again felt like a blessing.

Yeongguk, lets play soccer after school!

A friend, whose name I didnt know and who was sitting next to me in class, spoke to me as if it were familiar. In this rural neighborhood without even a modest arcade, it was an era when gathering to play soccer after school seemed like a promise.

Im not playing soccer starting today.

Sigh.

I took a deep breath and put strength into my lower abdomen as if practicing deep breathing. In sales, the most essential aspects were vocalization and pronunciation. Moreover, I was just a 14-year-old. I needed to breathe even deeper. Soon, my mouth opened as if pulling a trigger.

Now, now! Weve got very affordable and delicious mackerel! We also have hairtail and Spanish mackerel, so dont just pass by, take a look before you go!

My voice burst out like cannonballs, causing my mothers eyes to widen in shock. But that wasnt enough. I also needed gestures to compete with the seasoned Busan women who had been in the Namhang Market for a long time.

Noona! How about mackerel for dinner tonight? Just take a look. Mackerel is very popular with boyfriends!

A middle-aged woman passing by looked at me with wide, curious eyes. I was halfway to success. I seized the opportunity and put more strength into my voice.

The spring mackerel so good, even husbands who left home would return after smelling it!

Oh my, look at this kid. How old is he? So audacious.

Ladies, dont just walk by, come over here! Ill give you plenty of service!

Tourists and women started approaching the fish stall one by one. I took advantage of this momentum and engaged in even more aggressive sales pitches, making passersby stop as if they were watching a spectacle.

Oh, youre such a beautiful lady that I added a few extra hairtails. If my boss finds out, Ill get in trouble. Its a secret, a secret!

Now, even the Busan women selling fish around us stopped their aggressive sales pitches and curiously watched me. Thanks to that, the mackerel, hairtail, and Spanish mackerel on the fish stall sold out quickly.

My mother was able to pack up the fish stall earlier than usual that evening. Despite her objections, I helped with our fish stall and assisted the women nearby in cleaning up theirs. Perhaps because of that, I seemed to have become a local celebrity in the Namhang Market in just one day. The fruit vendor even brought us some leftover strawberries, praising my skills.

Son, you dont have to help me like this

My mother seemed proud and apologetic as her son sold fish with nimble hands. On our way home, her eyes were filled with countless emotions.

Its okay, I enjoy doing it.

Son, should we have your favorite pork belly for dinner tonight?

Mom, I like mackerel the most. Please make mackerel for dinner.

I would have liked to prepare dinner, but I couldnt bring myself to do it, knowing that feeding her son to his fill was my mothers simple joy. After a happy dinner in our small room, which felt like it could be filled up if we lay down, I spread out my study materials on the little desk.

Son, are you going to study?

My mothers eyes widened as she looked at me. This was so different from my usual behavior. She seemed at a loss at the sudden change in her son, who now seemed more mature. I was ready to study day and night. My mothers eyes reddened as memories of the past years came back. She must have had such a hard time losing her husband and raising her son alone as a young woman. The small room we finally got after moving from one lodging house to another. The earnings from the fish stall in Namhang Market were not enough. But today, with my help, we could sell all the fish for the first time. I silently held my mothers hand and didnt forget to hug her.

Looking at my mothers reddened eyes, I made a vow to myself repeatedly.

I would live a life without regrets.